People who haven’t really resumed socializing at levels they used to, people who lost the capacity to regulate during interpersonal interactions, people who lost trust in others… I encounter lots of partial returners out there

  • @[email protected]
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    207 hours ago

    Autistic Spectrum Disorder.

    We don’t have a natural ability to infer emotions from body language, for a start. We have to learn to actively pay attention to it. Replacing natural instinct that a neurotypical person has with an active thought process is tiring, for a start.

    Add to that most ASD people have trouble with emotional control, need to actively think about their own facial expressions, and often have social quirks that are unacceptable like nail biting which must be actively repressed… and being around others for hours on end is exhausting.

    On top of this, most ASD people also have ADHD, and in the modern open office environment between the social aspect and never ending barrage of distraction, and the workplace is hostile, actively hostile to folks with ASD.

    This combination of factors leads to having no where to unmask and relax until they get home. When they do, they are so exhausted from being something they are not for 10 hours (commute has to be included as its all public space) that when they get home they just shut down. They don’t call family or friends usually, they don’t get things around the house done. They have to turn off and try to re-energize themselves for doing it all again tomorrow.

    I know all this as I am ASD and ADHD

    Being able to work from home has brought actual balance to our lives as we can unmask the moment the camera goes off, we have rooms at home where we can close the door and remove distractions (well except mandatory work chats, but its a matter of muting that for focus) and at the end of the day we still have energy for our actual lives. In other words, this is the true work-life balance that I had always heard of but never truly felt I had.

    • @rottingleaf
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      44 hours ago

      Well, working from home it still requires discipline to optimize distractions, but it’s at least possible.

      • @[email protected]
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        33 hours ago

        Absolutely, especially with ADHD in the mix. When demand aversion kicks in, your brain literally tries to undermine any attempt to focus unless you can force it to cooperate. Music usually helps me with this.