On December 24th, 2008 I was almost 21 and drinking wine at my Grandma’s house with my family. We were having a good time. I don’t really talk to that side of the family anymore though. I got a phone call from my best friend, Kyle. I joking let my uncle answer. Kyle asked to talk to me. He sounded angry.
The next few words he said were like a a fucking nuclear bomb that seared my fucking brain for life. He said, “NineMileTower, Steve died (in Iraq). A bridge gave out, his hummer flipped, and he drowned.”
That was in 2008. I’m 37 now. I have two beautiful girls and an amazing wife. I think of Steve all the time. I ask myself, “Why do I deserve these amazing kids, wife and life, and he had to die?”
I fucking hate Christmas. I hate the stupid music. I hate fake bullshit decorations. I hate that I’m supposed to pretend that every Christmas it doesn’t fucking kill me that he isn’t here. I’m here enjoying my kids and their holiday and he’s dead.
I fucking hate Christmas.
Sending a virtual cyber hug your way. I’m a bit the same with Thanksgiving. Feeling a loss during a “cheery happy time” blows. Not too much else I can say. I hope you get through it.
If you don’t mind me asking, what happened on Thanksgiving?
Short story. Favorite aunt, cancer. Still miss her, so many years later.
Different person, but I also have a Thanksgiving story. My ex fiancee broke up with me on Thanksgiving from the way back from her family celebration because I’m autistic. This came right after the news about RTO that pushed out some of my closest friends and fellow organizers.
Thank you. It odd how it gets harder the happier I get.