• @ilinamorato
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    2123 hours ago

    “Pal, look. If you had your gold coins stacked in your cave, and put in a couple tables, we’d just call it a ‘counting room.’ Then we’d be talking maybe a little citation for not spacing your dragon-discouragement columns close enough together. But what you’ve got here, with all your gold and gems and statues just like…piled up on the floor? I gotta be honest, I don’t know how you don’t at least have a little wyrmling in here yet. This is absolutely a hoard, and if we don’t remediate now you’re gonna need exterminators by the end of the week.”

    • @edgemaster72
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      1120 hours ago

      That would be a fun way to subvert expectations, make it sound like your typical “rats in the cellar” job:

      “Yeah, I’ve got a bit of a pest problem in the cellar and you came highly recommended.”

      “I mean, we’ve done that in the past, but that’s a bit beneath us now…”

      “The job pays quite handsomely.”

      “…Well, it better.”

      And then the pest problem is a wyrmling and maybe some kobolds

      • @ilinamorato
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        819 hours ago

        Brilliant. For a while I have wanted to do a Victorian/Steampunk gothic fantasy “monster rally” campaign in the vein of Werewolf by Night/League of Extraordinary Gentlemen/Van Helsing/Universal Monsters, and I think I may have just found my hook.

    • @LovableSidekick
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      English
      617 hours ago

      You want Avaricious Dragons? Cuz this is how you get Avaricious Dragons.

      • @ilinamorato
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        619 hours ago

        Greatest call ever. Yes, absolutely.