• rockerface 🇺🇦
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    4 days ago

    Does it count as dysphoria if I’m ashamed of being a guy after reading some of the garbage posted by other men in the internet?

    • Cadenza
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      63 days ago

      Well, for what it’s worth, I’ve always felt closer and identified to girls, girl characters and behavior stereotypes identified as female by the broad public not out of active adhesion to them but rather than absolute rejection of men.

      I long pondered then possibility of seeking transition, and to a certain extent still am, but ended up more or less getting to terms that my sex is “male” and my gender is “traitor”

      Being an active traitor to my group (and not a “good” man) is, I suppose the best I can do. Not as a feminist ally but as an enemy of masculinity.

      It may sound dumb, but that’s where I belong right now.

      • @GaMEChld
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        13 days ago

        What does an enemy of masculinity mean? You cheer when the women on The View say we don’t need men and they are useless?

        • Cadenza
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          33 days ago

          What feminists do is what feminists do.

          Ain’t got nothing to do with me. My job is to not protect aggressors, to ridicule overt display of classic masculinity and to debunk any attempt from my fellow men to act like the “good guy” because they read a comic about feminism.

          Oh, and support M/M sexual assault survivors. That also is part of my job.

          Ain’t much, but it’s honest work.

          • @GaMEChld
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            23 days ago

            Good on you! Just out of curiosity, how often do you run into aggressors IRL? I too would call out bad behavior but I’m relatively introverted so I often wonder where everyone is running into assholes and what context. Could you share an anecdote or two?

            • Cadenza
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              32 days ago

              I work in univs… My god the sheer number of : -Sexual misconduct -Misogyny against foreign female students (prohibited hijab in courses which is illegal in my country) -Scientific fraud with a very sexist overtone (gimme your results for free or I’ll break your career) I’ve seen…

              I also have a weird personal background that I happily share when I suspect something. More than often, it allows people to talk about thing they may or may not share in certain situations.

              • Cadenza
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                22 days ago

                @[email protected] but to be honest, more often than not, there’s nothing to do because the victim has too much to lose and asks that her story is kept a secret, which you need to respect. But nothing prevents one, in this case, to advise the coming generation of who they should avoid being in a room alone with. And in a few (rare) cases, collective action led to some of the most dangerous ones being fired.

                • @GaMEChld
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                  42 days ago

                  Oof. That must be infuriating. Apparently ADHD ppl like myself can have increased justice sensitivity. I can’t let shit go. I got fired last year for standing against workplace toxicity and for employees rights. Litigation in progress. If I’m wrong, I want a court to tell me that.

                  • Cadenza
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                    32 days ago

                    I suppose it required a great deal of courage. I hope the court will rule in your favor!

    • Luffy
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      3 days ago

      In my opinion it is a good way to start the „Am I actually male, or is it just what everyone told me?” thought. I am not Saying that you cant identify as non cis because you are ashamed about what Nazis (Let’s just call them what they are) make out males to be. But if you actually really 100% (I can’t stress this enough, if you just have a faintest afterthought, just don’t block it with the „I am a male” argument) identify yourself as male, you should not choose a gender you are less comfortable with because there are some bad people there. Bad people are everywhere. Alice weidel and the Braune Lappen are woman too. People who gatekeep being non cis are non cis too. So just identify as the gender you feel best with.

      • rockerface 🇺🇦
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        153 days ago

        Good point. I am comfortable with my gender, but sometimes my mind goes to a darker place. Thanks for the words of encouragement, I feel I needed them.