you can’t just leave your house with kids. they have to come along. cue, 30 minutes of wrangling and 15 minutes of putting them in the car.

then you get to the burger place and the kids bitch and moan that this isn’t “mappy meels”.

so you order your burger, and take off to get your kids a happy meal.

you finally return home two hours after you decided you wanted a burger. get the kids settled in. they open the box and it’s not nuggies. so now the kids are crying, because they have hamburgers instead of chicken nuggets.

so you throw some nuggets in the microwave, and give them to the little shits.

it’s now been 30-40 minutes since you got home, so almost three hours since your craving for a burger. you’re feeling dizzy and irritable because you haven’t ate since breakfast 12 hours ago.

you sit down with your bag burger and open it up. it’s cold. the fries are all dry and limp. with much disappointment you open the wrapper to your burger. it’s a fucking grilled chicken.

you pick up your meal, toss it into the garbage out of rage, and grab a box of ramen.

the ramen is salty because you’re crying into the broth.