I worked way too hard turning this post legible.
Most of the state name changes are brilliant, but some are either weak or jokes I didn’t get (“Mime SODA”?), or maybe I just misread the whiteboard chicken-scratch. Regardless, suggestions for alternatives encouraged; I’ll post an updated version if there’s interest.
Alt text:
spoiler
A map of the United States of America, with the state names changed out:
Washington - Obama
Oregon - Whoregon
California - Caliphornia
Idaho - Weedaho
Nevada - Old New Vegas
Montana - Mount-a-man-a
Wyoming - Yaoiming
Utah - Putah
Arizona - Gayrizona
Colorado - BIPOColor-ado
New Mexico - New Sexico
North Dakota - Top Dickota
South Dakota - Bottom Dickota
Nebraska - Neosbraska
Kansas - Transas
Oklahoma - Wokelahoma
Texas - New California Republic
Minnesota - Mimesoda (Minnesoda?)
Iowa - Biowa
Missouri - Missyuri
Arkansas - Arktransas
Louisiana - Lesbiana
Wisconsin - Wiscumsin
Illinois - Polynois
Michigan - Michicano
Indiana - Libdiana
Kentucky - Demfucky
Tennessee - Themussy
Mississippi - Mxissippi
Alabama - Alabortion
Ohio - Omegahio
West Virginia - Estroginia
Maine - Ukraine
Vermont - Hermont
New Hampshire - New Tofushire
Massachusetts - Maskachusetts
Connecticut - Connecticunt
Rhode Island - Rode v. Wade Island
New York - Mamdanistan
New Jersey - Nude Jersey
Maryland - Gay Marryland
Delaware - Delawoke
Washington DC - Doll City
Virginia - Vagina
North Carolina - Nonbinary Arolina
South Carolina - Sapphic Arolina
Georgia - Orgya
Florida - Fursona
Alaska - Allahska
Hawaii - Hawahe/him
Also labeled:
USA (United Socialist Allahism)
Gulf of Mexico - Gulf of Gay Sexico
Or-eh-gun, don’t stretch out the e.