I was in the bathroom of a BedStuy bar in February, doing my thing, when I heard a loud banging on the door.
“Be out in a sec” I said, figuring it was just some drunk.
A second later the lock is picked. Virgil, puffing on a Juul in defiance of local law, steps in. I start to say “what the fu . . . .”, but he cuts me off by blowing his mango vape in my face, along with what smelled like halal cart meat. “Shut up, you lepton” he said, then took out his keys and took a large bump of cocaine. As he replaced them his portable bidet fell from the interior pocket of his cheap blazer. He looked at me again with scorn in his eyes and said “Are you gonna sit there peeing out your doo-doo ass all night?”.
At this point I was getting mad, but as I started to speak he just said “what? What?” loudly as I did. By that time the bartender had come to see what the problem was - before I could say a word Virgil said “hey man, this junkie was shooting up in here, call the cops”.
I was thrown out, and my credit card was left behind at the bar. The worst part was the next day there were 14 Cape Cods and 4 Brandy Alexanders charged to it.
I saw Virgil Texas at a grocery store in Los Angeles yesterday. I told him how cool it was to meet him in person, but I didn’t want to be a douche and bother him and ask him for photos or anything. He said, “Oh, like you’re doing now?” I was taken aback, and all I could say was “Huh?” but he kept cutting me off and going “huh? huh? huh?” and closing his hand shut in front of my face. I walked away and continued with my shopping, and I heard him chuckle as I walked off. When I came to pay for my stuff up front I saw him trying to walk out the doors with like fifteen Milky Ways in his hands without paying. The girl at the counter was very nice about it and professional, and was like “Sir, you need to pay for those first.” At first he kept pretending to be tired and not hear her, but eventually turned back around and brought them to the counter. When she took one of the bars and started scanning it multiple times, he stopped her and told her to scan them each individually “to prevent any electrical infetterence,” and then turned around and winked at me. I don’t even think that’s a word. After she scanned each bar and put them in a bag and started to say the price, he kept interrupting her by yawning really loudly.
I won’t have to see people like this for at least a week :
the dude looks so happy it makes me feel bad
fr tho is… is that u
I was in the bathroom of a BedStuy bar in February, doing my thing, when I heard a loud banging on the door.
“Be out in a sec” I said, figuring it was just some drunk.
A second later the lock is picked. Virgil, puffing on a Juul in defiance of local law, steps in. I start to say “what the fu . . . .”, but he cuts me off by blowing his mango vape in my face, along with what smelled like halal cart meat. “Shut up, you lepton” he said, then took out his keys and took a large bump of cocaine. As he replaced them his portable bidet fell from the interior pocket of his cheap blazer. He looked at me again with scorn in his eyes and said “Are you gonna sit there peeing out your doo-doo ass all night?”.
At this point I was getting mad, but as I started to speak he just said “what? What?” loudly as I did. By that time the bartender had come to see what the problem was - before I could say a word Virgil said “hey man, this junkie was shooting up in here, call the cops”.
I was thrown out, and my credit card was left behind at the bar. The worst part was the next day there were 14 Cape Cods and 4 Brandy Alexanders charged to it.
What?
Exactly.
I saw Virgil Texas at a grocery store in Los Angeles yesterday. I told him how cool it was to meet him in person, but I didn’t want to be a douche and bother him and ask him for photos or anything. He said, “Oh, like you’re doing now?” I was taken aback, and all I could say was “Huh?” but he kept cutting me off and going “huh? huh? huh?” and closing his hand shut in front of my face. I walked away and continued with my shopping, and I heard him chuckle as I walked off. When I came to pay for my stuff up front I saw him trying to walk out the doors with like fifteen Milky Ways in his hands without paying. The girl at the counter was very nice about it and professional, and was like “Sir, you need to pay for those first.” At first he kept pretending to be tired and not hear her, but eventually turned back around and brought them to the counter. When she took one of the bars and started scanning it multiple times, he stopped her and told her to scan them each individually “to prevent any electrical infetterence,” and then turned around and winked at me. I don’t even think that’s a word. After she scanned each bar and put them in a bag and started to say the price, he kept interrupting her by yawning really loudly.
I think he was doing drugs. It would explain the rambling
PAY MY BARTAB VIRGIL
oh