• @TotallynotJessica
    link
    149 months ago

    Punishment probably isn’t the best way to improve things. Even under your view of things, it should be clear that punishment does more to make the punisher feel good than actually solve problems.

      • @captainlezbian
        link
        109 months ago

        I sympathize with your pain but also holy fuck I hope you never get your way. I’ve seen what happens when people who think like you get power, they’re brutally abusive.

      • @TotallynotJessica
        link
        59 months ago

        Believe it or not, most people will stop doing things if they are convinced that it isn’t in their self interest. The idea that trauma is effective at getting people to stop doing something is neither accurate or acceptable. Trauma could easily make some people lash out and cause even more damage. If there’s something we shouldn’t tolerate, it’s people who want to inflict unnecessary and unproductive harm on other people. It probably didn’t make you less of a threat.

        You need help, and not just therapy. You would benefit from real life friends and positive interactions with people who treat you as an equal. Residential treatment might be a good idea if you haven’t done it before. Treatment will only work if you work with it. It’s assistance, not having the problem solved for you. You need to do some of the lifting.

          • @TotallynotJessica
            link
            19 months ago

            It doesn’t really make sense that a species of irrational narcissists would all work together to deny you happiness. Ironically, that perception is both irrational and narcissistic. It’s full of contradictions and assumptions about everyone’s beliefs and intentions, while also assuming that people make sure you cannot be happy in particular. You’re not that special.

              • @TotallynotJessica
                link
                19 months ago

                I’m not keeping you out of my social circle, partially because I don’t have one, but mainly because people on fourms like these aren’t really true social circles. You can find more proper social circles in communities on discord, but this place is too large and anonymous to be a solid social circle. You might be able to find a smaller group through a community like this, but this place isn’t that intimate.

                The biggest reason people here are frustrated with you is that you seem to have spiraled into a bad spot, yet aren’t here with the intention of escaping your despair. You seem to be here to lash out against the world that wronged you, but it seems to have done more to perpetuate your anger. This stuff is difficult to listen to, even for well meaning people. Trauma dumping to strangers isn’t generally a good idea.

                You also appeal to the discrimination minorititized groups face, as if I’m not a member of those groups? Most people in this community are queer, but I’m personally a brown, neurodivergent trans woman. On top of doing well at discrimination bingo, I’ve also suffered from debilitating mental illness for most of my life. I’ve required medication to function since I was 11, and I’ve spent years of my life resisting the urge to off myself because I didn’t want to make other people feel bad.

                When I say that you’re not special, I mean that you’re not an exceptionally terrible human being deserving of suffering. I know I certainly believed that in the not too distant past, but one thing that helped me recover was recognizing that I would never treat another person the way I treated myself. Your outlook may be different as you seem to view people in a much worse light, but it still may help.

                  • @TotallynotJessica
                    link
                    19 months ago

                    You and I have very different views on how to make the world better. I don’t care much for retribution. I prefer what’s effective. Some people need to be removed from society permanently, some can be reformed, and for some transgressions, threat of and follow through with punishment will dissuade behavior. Regardless, I want to build a social contract that serves everyone. A big part of that is limiting unnecessary harm.