• @[email protected]
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    1 year ago

    Oh don’t even worry about it, you’re not at all wrong! I have tried anything you can think of, except strong opiates. I’m saving those for if I ever get terminally ill!

    Ketamine is one of the most incredible and insane drugs I’ve ever done. I believe in a therapeutic setting, it could be of amazing use. (Well obv it is, since it’s being used with success right now!)

    I’ve only had ket insufflated. A little bit of it makes you feel like you’re a liiittle drunk, but without the wobbles. It takes about ten minutes to kick in. Your coordination stays pretty good but things just seem a little weird and silly. Lasts about a half hour.

    A moderate dose makes things REALLY weird. It still takes 5-10 minutes before you feel it. Stuff just kinda… tastes cubic? Like, not the actual taste, but they look like they taste cubic. Walking around is very funny. There’s a distinctive K-walk where you kinda lean back and balance is strange. You’ll be back to normal in an hour to and hour and a half.

    High doses are where things get absolutely wild. A K-hope is a different experience for everyone, but my last one… I was in a hotel room with like seven of my friends, and we all had the same amount: too much. I was laying in bed with my partner and I VERY quickly after insufflation could feel my body free-falling, even though I could feel the bed against my back. What I experienced for the next few hours is completely indescribable. I was conscious and could see and (kinda) interact with my friends… but I wasn’t there. Or anywhere. I could see the flow of time. I could see… so much. Like a curtain was peeled back and I was peering into the inner workings of all existence. It was absolutely terrifying. It would never end. I would never end. I’ve never existed. I’ve existed forever. Completely inexplicable, completely horrifying, and unforgettable experience.

    We came back to relative normalcy around two hours later, and full normalcy once we finally got to sleep. That was five years ago and the only time I’d try that again is in a clinical setting with a licensed therapist/physician. I’ve had some since then, but only a few times and probably a fifth of that amount or less.

    Recreationally, it can make games super interesting under the right circumstances. I blind started The Forgotten City on a moderate bit of K and as a confusing mystery game, it was the perfect state of mind. I was just as confused as the character I was controlling, hahaha.

    • @ZMonster
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      11 year ago

      Wow, what a vivid description! Thank you for sharing. My Dr. Is convinced that the problems that I’m having stem from a lot of trauma that I have normalized. She has a very strict clinical setting for it where things are discussed before and after. I got the feeling that preparation and expectation were very important to them.

      But I’m looking forward to it whether it helps or not.

      • @[email protected]
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        21 year ago

        If you remember me, please let me know how it it goes! I’m sorry to hear about your past trauma, and I hope it’s a transformatively healing experience for you. Much love!

        • @ZMonster
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          11 year ago

          You’re very kind and I will. And it’s not anything that I have really been aware of. I mean, I have but haven’t thought it wasn’t normal. I was homeless for a few years as an adolescent, then I was part of a genocide, then I learned that my parents were wildly abusive and normal people don’t do things like that. So from my perspective, everything has been fine and I’ve just been trying to get by. 😆🤦 Luckily, I met some people that got me help and that led me here. I’m entirely unaware of my own anxiety (even though others around me see it clearly) but I tested very high. So I have no idea what to expect, and my current homework is to come up with goals and I’m unsure of what I want the outcome to be.