National security officials are used to shaking off absurd conspiracy theories, but the latest rumor that’s gripped MAGA world just hits different.

The claims by Fox News and far-right influencers that pop star Taylor Swift is part of a Pentagon “psychological operation” to get President Joe Biden reelected, and somehow rig the Super Bowl to benefit Kansas City Chiefs tight end (and Swift’s boyfriend) Travis Kelce, has been met with forehead slaps in the national security world.

“The absurdity of it all boggles the mind,” said one senior administration official, granted anonymity because they were not authorized to comment publicly on the matter. “It feels like one of those ‘tell me you are a MAGA conspiracy theorist, without telling me you are a MAGA conspiracy theorist’ memes.”

  • @foggy
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    4311 months ago

    When we look back on this era what are we going to say drove them to this? Like, we explain the Salem witch trials by saying that there was ergot in the water which likely had them hallucinating.

    What is it now? Is TikTok this much of a problem? Is there ergot in the water? What the hell is happening…

    • @Xbeam
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      3611 months ago

      Maybe lead and micro-plastics? But that’s just a guess.

      • SharkAttak
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        3411 months ago

        Lead in the water, micro plastics in the food, Reagan in the air.

      • @foggy
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        911 months ago

        Plausible. It seems apparent that this is something that’s been introduced into basically all humans water supply in the last 50 years. I’m sure it’s been getting worse and worse as time has gone on, and it could be that we are at a critical mass where it is starting to affect behaviors en masse.

        • @MegaUltraChicken
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          411 months ago

          Yeah “deliberately making ourselves too stupid to survive” sounds about right for some shit we’d pull off.

      • @foggy
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        2011 months ago

        I mean, bro, we had fucking witch trials.

        Witch trials.

        We actually believed in witches and we burned people at the stake.

        This is not the most lunacy humanity has ever seen. Not by a long shot. It’s just the most lunacy that we’ve seen with modern tools to help suss that lunacy out.

        There is certainly an explanation for what’s going on. We just haven’t identified it.

        • @Viking_Hippie
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          11 months ago

          We actually believed in witches and we burned people at the stake.

          Only a matter of time before the cult starts talking about publicly executing LGBTQ+ people and women who have had abortions or miscarriages. Possibly by burning them at the stake.

          • @[email protected]
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            711 months ago

            Or federal employees…they’re also called the deep state.

            Where’d I hear that in the news recently?

            • @Viking_Hippie
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              1211 months ago

              A deranged MAGA cultist recently CUT OFF HIS DAD’S HEAD and posted about it online because of the dad apparently being a federal employee 😬

              I’d find you a link to an article about it but frankly I dread what other search results I’d get for THOSE keywords!

          • @foggy
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            211 months ago

            I do not disagree. But we are not there yet, it has been crazier before. It does appear that we are on track, that’s why I’m so concerned and curious as to what the fuck is causing this shit, but we’re not there yet. Probably because of those modern tools that we have, I feel like if whatever is going on right now is going on in the 1700s we would be done for.

      • @[email protected]
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        711 months ago

        They joined the war on disease on the side of the disease. There’s nothing else to say, at that point. They are bereft of joy, logic, life, survival instinct, humanity, anything good you name it.

        • @[email protected]
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          511 months ago

          "He who fights with monsters should look to it that he himself does not become a monster. And if you gaze long into an abyss, the abyss also gazes into you. "

          Basically : tread carefully on your crusade lest you become the thing you hate

            • @[email protected]
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              211 months ago

              Nietzsche has some broad appeal, well, amongst those that read philosophy. You can’t get past the post-modernists without summiting that intellectual mountain. I suppose existentialism is somewhat Niche-ey…but what do I know, I read Zarathustra at 16. Ymmv

    • @[email protected]
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      1011 months ago

      we explain the Salem witch trials by saying that there was ergot in the water which likely had them hallucinating

      Witch trials were ways for powerful people to get rid of those who challenged the established system. These conspiracies are the same as they’ve always been.

      Fox News leaders aren’t pushing these stories because they’re high. It’s because they’re billionaires who don’t want to lose their power and control. Just like in the time of witch trials, these powerful people are spreading fear, doubt, and confusion in order to distract the masses from giving too much attention to meddling people making troublesome arguments against the current system.

    • @SlopppyEngineer
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      1011 months ago

      Possibly how all the different crises like inequality, climate, capitalism, pollution all converged. People sought quick solutions and some leaders gave them solutions that were ready, quick and wrong. Blaming others went to cult like heights. Until it all collapsed.

      • @foggy
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        411 months ago

        All of these things contribute to it, yes, but I do think that there is a level of absurdity to what we are witnessing that is not adequately explained simply by coercion. Perhaps I’m wrong.

        • @SlopppyEngineer
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          311 months ago

          Humans do whacky shit on a regular basis, certainly if they don’t really understand what’s going on. Cargo cults come to mind.

    • @surewhynotlem
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      511 months ago

      Tiktok? If you find someone who isn’t a swifty on Tiktok, they probably won’t survive long.

      This nonsense comes from Fox and truth social.

      • @foggy
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        111 months ago

        Didn’t Andrew Tate rise on TikTok?

        • @surewhynotlem
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          511 months ago

          I think he was YouTube. Tiktok is very short form content.

          That said, the only time I’ve ever seen that guy’s face is in a mugshot, so I could be wrong.