National security officials are used to shaking off absurd conspiracy theories, but the latest rumor that’s gripped MAGA world just hits different.

The claims by Fox News and far-right influencers that pop star Taylor Swift is part of a Pentagon “psychological operation” to get President Joe Biden reelected, and somehow rig the Super Bowl to benefit Kansas City Chiefs tight end (and Swift’s boyfriend) Travis Kelce, has been met with forehead slaps in the national security world.

“The absurdity of it all boggles the mind,” said one senior administration official, granted anonymity because they were not authorized to comment publicly on the matter. “It feels like one of those ‘tell me you are a MAGA conspiracy theorist, without telling me you are a MAGA conspiracy theorist’ memes.”

    • @Professorozone
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      144 months ago

      Yeah but… ummm…you’re on the OTHER end of all our guns. No one is safe from our craziness.

    • @Retrograde
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      124 months ago

      As a half Brit half American, Britain really hasn’t been really pulling many Ws recently either

        • @Retrograde
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          24 months ago

          It’s paradoxical, I throw the tea and it just spins in place in mid air

          Also it’s obviously spelled C̴͉͎̘̱͙̙̣̱̜̲̖̎̂̋̔ȍ̶̻͕̬̞̰̫̙̩̯̤̳́͊̒̚͜ͅl̷̨̹̺̳͔͉͇͎̻̐̐͌̽̾̀̉͐̈́̆͗̎̚̕œ̸̢͉̜̽͛̅̚ư̸̪͍̂͐̀̀̍r̶͈̮̲͉̀̓̏̋̈́͑̌̔̽͊́͘͝͠

      • CashewNut 🏴󠁢󠁥󠁧󠁿
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        44 months ago

        Doesn’t stop me being able to laugh at America. If you’re half British you should know one of our defining traits is self-deprecation. Britains Ls are eternal and everlasting and I will laugh at them all. But Americas - oh fuck yeah. They gimme a hearty laugh too!

        How does someone be half American? Where do you pledge your allegiance?

    • @theangryseal
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      64 months ago

      Until it reaches you in the form of a global economy collapse.

      Of course, China could be the savior, but would that really be a win?

      • CashewNut 🏴󠁢󠁥󠁧󠁿
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        -54 months ago

        Why would I care about Chinese hegemony? Sinophobia is more of a Yank fear. I really couldn’t give a shit.

        • @[email protected]
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          4 months ago

          You should. We all need an at least semi-democratic country at the top. We need the non-democratic authoritarian kind of governance to be seen to fail. Again. If American fail, we need Europe to start punching it’s weight even more. And unfortunately the crazy right (no doubt helped by enemies of freedom) is on the rise across Europe. Least in Britain, it looks like the nightmare might be over this election. It will take years to undo the economic and social damage they have done though.

          Edit: English

    • billwashere
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      54 months ago

      Except if the Cheeto Benito starts some shit somewhere in the world due to his excellent diplomatic skills god forbid he gets elected again, pretty sure we are all in the shitter.

    • @Clubbing4198
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      44 months ago

      until we drag the whole western world into a real fucking shit show. lets not forget how close tony blair and george w bush were when it came to handling iraq

    • @[email protected]
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      4 months ago

      Yeah, except most reality TV is 99% made-up bullshit that just impacts nothing outside the “participants” and water cooler gossip.

      Except Love on the Spectrum. Thats just wholesome AF.