I feel like a matchmaker of memes
I’m glad I’m not the only person who stands half naked in a dark kitchen eating shredded cheese directly from the bag while staring at my phone and hoping nobody sees me.
Your phone sees you. It is cursed to always see, and to hear everything.
haha mark zuckerburg you creepy fuck look at me LOOK AT ME
It’s like a year’s worth of pent up desire for more free time, then we get it and have no clue what to do so we default to scrolling, YouTube, and enough weed to stay at least mildly stoned for a week. Then back to work like nothing happened, except nobody has been doing your work so you get to deal with whatever work picked up during that time.
Meanwhile, people in eSSenTiAl industries: “there’s a holiday?”
What else do you think the paper plates full of warm ham in the break room are meant to signify? Management is here to celebrate with you, in spirit.
Have we all collectively lost track of time??
We currently exist outside time itself. No gods, no sins.
Image Transcription: Twitter Post
Do Less Dad, @do_less_dad
*Sometime during the December 26th - January 2nd haze
[Me]: I think I’ll read a book on this beautiful Sunday morning.
[Narrator]: It was actually 7pm on a Wednesday. And he didn’t read a book. He ate the shredded cheese instead.
