Stupid sexy jesus
First it’s Seville holy week, now this
It’s definitely cheating but I’d have a hard time swimming too if my hands and feet had holes punched through them.
Speed holes
That was my nickname in college
Mom?
Is she stuck in the dryer again?
No, but my step sister is. Let me go check on her.
You don’t have to get my permission, cousin.
This is the third time this week!
See it’s illegal because this was clearly a butterfly event, if Jesus had just saved his act for the freestyle event there would be no problem.
Found the fellow butterflyer
Freestyle event sounds like a weekend with Debbie Deb and Exposé
Jesus needs to work on getting out of the blocks faster. He’s literally walking on water, but every other swimmer got out faster and is even with him at the time of that first picture.
OK but he would be shit at diving, that would hurt
“Jesus takes the Gold!”
Kind of a dick move turning the pool water into wine mid-event though, drunk people don’t swim all that well.
“And the frankincense and myrrh, which we didn’t even know we had here!”
I’d be curious to see what prompts were used to make this
“disqualified?! Me?! It’s not my fault that your definition of swimming is stupid and demigod-excluding! Dad was pissed enough when you sports types threw hissy fits about ThE TrAnS-aThLeTeS, he is gonna be livid when he hears this! He sends me to spread some love among you warlike idiots, you folks discriminate and butcher me, he sends homosexual people to enrich your life, you lay words in his mouth, discriminate and butcher them. He sends trans people so you’d finally do away with gender norms, you discriminate and butcher them. Then he sends me again to calm you fuckers down and look what you are doing again! I’ve convinced him to not instantly wipe this shit universe when he saw what some of you did, im not vouching for your sorry lot ever again!”
Smash.
They should be interviewing that camera guy with the third leg instead
“I like to thank my coach, my teammates, mom and dad… Shout-out to everyone back home – sup Vatican City!! And most importantly to Jesus -uh, I mean me. Thank you, me!! For I wouldn’t be here. ✌️”
He’s in someone’s lane running over them
They’re 70% water!
