• @RegalPotoo
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    23710 months ago

    Unpopular (?) opinion - text/IM systems are asynchronous messaging systems, and in most cases it’s totally reasonable to not immediately jump on your phone and answer a message as soon as you get the notification.

    One of my friends is the sort of person who will stop mid sentence when their phone pings so they can answer whatever they’ve been sent and it drives me nuts

    • @Dasnap
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      7210 months ago

      Can’t remember the last time I had my phone off silent.

      • @[email protected]
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        5110 months ago

        Yeah my phone gets attention when i want, not when it wants.

        I have all notifications off for all apps too, i don’t need an app saying hey we haven’t fed you crap for an hour come look

        • Fubber Nuckin'
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          1210 months ago

          My phone used to be on vibrate until i accidentally cut the motor during a repair. My phone suddenly became a healthier part of my life where i look at it when i feel like. I also miss every urgent message from everyone.

    • @[email protected]
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      4710 months ago

      My wife is like that, and it kills me. I might leave your text unread for hours because if it was important, you’d call. I have priorities! Like the next round of Helldivers.

      • TJA!
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        1610 months ago

        I’ll never call. But I also understand that not everyone looks at their phone at all times.

      • @[email protected]
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        9 months ago

        You’d call

        Does anyone call these days? Nobody seems to pick up for fuck all.

        I’ve received 158 calls in the last 7 days, and not one was a valid call. All spam and fraud.

        • Echo Dot
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          39 months ago

          For some reason I don’t get spam calls. I’m just had to look and the last call I received about anything was on the 18th of February. Where are all my spam calls dammit, I’m missing out.

        • @OhmsLawn
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          29 months ago

          I don’t know.

          Android is pretty damned good at filtering those. I usually have 1-2 a week that I have to send to the transcription service.

          The landline at work is a different story.

          • @[email protected]
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            19 months ago

            It doesn’t offer any out of the box filters to my knowledge. What are you talking about?

            My carrier does but it’s pretty bad. It does filter maybe 70 out of 150 and then I blocked each and every one. At a certain point I’ll have blocked every single number in my area code. Which is fine because I no longer live in the area code for my phone number.

        • @systemglitch
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          19 months ago

          I have had none in the last month. It’s the magic of not giving my number to anyone who does not absolutely require it.

    • @[email protected]
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      39 months ago

      This is so annoying, I like to remain in the room even if I’m using my phone, but my friends literally check-out. Like they’re in another place and can’t communicate with me whilst using their phones.

    • Footnote2669
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      29 months ago

      A relative does that, and sometimes completely forgets we were having a convo after they’re done with the phone

    • @systemglitch
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      09 months ago

      I feel so disengaged when someone does that to me that I just stop communicating with them in the future

    • Olivia
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      09 months ago

      It’s unpopular because it’s so far removed from it’s closes analogue analogue, envelope mail. And because it’s on mobile phones people incorrectly assume it’s closer to a phone call.

      I find it’s simpler to simplify all internet scenarios to postal mail & home telephone scenarios.

    • @[email protected]
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      -39 months ago

      I always see the priority from highest to lowest as Calls, then texts then emails. Texts can be responded to immediately or later in the day, but more than ~4-8 hours is unacceptable

      • @[email protected]
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        9 months ago

        I’d raise that to 24 hours, but you’re right. I know two people like that. One just lets messages pile up until they feel like responding, which can take up to a month. Another straight up told me they have so much incoming messages that they have no hope of ever going throughб so if I wanted to reach themб I should keep messaging them like every few minutes to keep the dialogue up in the list. I’d say that’s just a poor communications hygiene. Suffice to say I don’t really talk to either of them anymore. I know smalltalk isn’t urgent, but I cant see it as a dialogue anymore if it goes slower than a message/day.

  • @[email protected]
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    1239 months ago

    Orrrrrr he has social anxiety and has difficulty replying.

    Sincerely, somebody with social anxiety

    • @[email protected]
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      139 months ago

      This is me too. That and there is this stupid goddamn idea of “caring too much.” Like responding quickly is a bad thing because it makes you seem desperate… Ffs I wouldn’t be messaging you if I wasn’t interested, but now I need to wait and play a stupid mind game so I don’t lose the persons interest because they might assume that stupid thing about quick replies being a bad thing…

      I hate mental games so freaking much…

      • @[email protected]
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        129 months ago

        If the other person cares about silly games like this, they might not be that interested in taking to you.

        • Flying Squid
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          29 months ago

          Yeah, find someone not into playing head games. There are plenty such people about.

      • I Cast Fist
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        19 months ago

        There’s a Deathbulge comic for that, I just can’t find it. Basically a dude taking forever to reply to get “cool points” and accidentally replying immediately a second time, immediately losing all his cool

  • @[email protected]
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    839 months ago

    If it’s recently, its probably helldiver’s 2 in which case wait your fucking turn lady! He’s risking his life to spread liberty and force democracy on godless bugs and soulless robots. THESE ARE IMPORTANT THINGS

      • @headrush
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        29 months ago

        Rock and stone, brother!

    • @Sylvartas
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      79 months ago

      I kind of wish helldivers had more downtime so I wouldn’t neglect my gf’s texts as much

      • @[email protected]
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        109 months ago

        There’s tons of downtime if you’re trash like me! Two minute respawn timer hangout gang through and through

  • @[email protected]
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    5710 months ago

    At one point in college some friends and i made up a system for just explicitly state what sort of response you needed. Ok, “made up a system” is a little over stating it. Basically it was “Hey this is important can I have your undivided attention?” through the lens of stupid nerd jokes. Like, “setPriority(10) i’m locked out of my apartment do you have a spare key?” vs “setPriority(0) i am so mad that fallout3 requires GFWL”

    Now i’d probably just say “hey this is important do you have a few minutes?” in normal words.

    • @Delphia
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      59 months ago

      If you dont know why it takes me 25 minutes to respond, you dont know me well enough to get mad that you are only #2 on my priorities list.

      • @[email protected]
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        99 months ago

        You can tell this if your man starts replying in one minuite, but gets progressively slower and slower until it’s one hour each by the end.

      • @TheControlled
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        49 months ago

        Battlefield rounds can easily be that too. In custom matches in can be 1½ hours!

  • @wellee
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    3010 months ago

    Wait… some people immediately text back, over and over? Huh.

      • @[email protected]
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        19 months ago

        Any breaks during CK3 make me forget which country the daughter was to be married to compared to the country who’s line you were exterminating to get a title, yeah I need to sort that out before replying to a text about what flavour ice cream is the best. I do need to work on my memory though.

    • @[email protected]
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      9 months ago

      Reminds of peep show where David Mitchell injects the Battle of Stalingrad into every other conversation he has with a woman lol

    • @[email protected]
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      09 months ago

      Actual games. Obviously I’m generalizing here and that isn’t fair, but there are times when I feel like my wife is a Great Wife Buffalo who has never had the patience for that bullshit. She’s very direct when communicating.

  • @BradleyUffner
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    1910 months ago

    So what’s her excuse when it’s the other way around?

    • @scrion
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      229 months ago

      Why wouldn’t it be video games?

      • @BradleyUffner
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        89 months ago

        Because the text makes it sound like the person disapproves of the delay being caused by video games.

      • Captain Aggravated
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        39 months ago

        Fully half of women report they never play video games, and even more report specifically playing The Sims and nothing else.

        Lots of chicks out there for whom gaming isn’t part of their world.

  • Flying Squid
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    199 months ago

    My wife plays way too many video games at work apparently. Or is this just a guy thing?

  • @[email protected]
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    169 months ago

    My priority list goes:

    People in front of me What I’m doing now Thoughts in my head Digital communication

    • NickwithaC
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      39 months ago
      People in front of me
      
      What I'm doing now
      
      Thoughts in my head
      
      Digital communication
      

      Gotta leave an empty line in between

      • Echo Dot
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        9 months ago

        Yeah but now you put them in a code block

        It should be

        People in front of me

        What I’m doing now

        Thoughts in my head

        Digital communication

        • NickwithaC
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          19 months ago

          Code block = copy & paste-able.

  • I Cast Fist
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    129 months ago

    Whenever someone sends me an important message and I don’t read/respond in time, they call to get my attention so I can do so. My ex used to get mad at me for “ignoring” her for 2h or more and would call. I was just busy doing whatever and ignoring the phone as usual.

    • @Dnn
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      139 months ago

      I hate that. Also in a business setting. By definition a message (be it text, email, whatever) is not urgent. They might be important and of course you shouldn’t leave them unread for days, but for urgency there’s calls.

      • @[email protected]
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        99 months ago

        I always perceive an IM as high but not immediate importance, an email as “get to it when you can”, and phone call as immediate.

        The older people I work with tend to call for email level things.

  • Echo Dot
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    129 months ago

    Oh I’m busy doing some other aspect of my life. Might possibly be that I’m working, at my job, which by the way was one of your requirements on the dating profile.

    Not absolutely everything in my life is about video games.