- cross-posted to:
- nottheonion
- cross-posted to:
- nottheonion
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Land of the free
- Freedom not guaranteed. Subject to availability and restrictions at the time of issuance. Pursuant to obligations according to local regulations, your freedom may be more or less than the freedom implied. All rights reserved to freedom issuers. Freedom may be revoked at any time for any reason subject to local availability. Please visit your freedom office to dispute claims. Disputes may or may not be resolved at the freedom offices discretion, with resolutions including but not limited to the loss of additional freedom.
Conditions may apply.
For more information, please reread.
Land of the free
You misunderstood, see it was “Land or the free”… and then they took all the land.
Land of the dumb.
Free to do what they say.
And the home of the wage slave
This is even more concerning when you look at some of the motivations: “The bill was largely spurred by recent protests on university and college campuses across the country, including North Carolina-based schools, against the war in Gaza.”
this is about control, fascism. historically student protests are the canary in the coal mine on a number of issues. powers that be are looking to stamp out any dissent going forward.
It’s about all of that, but they absolutely could have put in an exemption for medical needs and chose not to. The anti-mask virtue signaling to their plague-ridden base is a bonus.
There is def throwing out meat for the rabid base. Feel like North Carolina is looking to hook up with TX and FL. University of North Carolina to divert $2.3m DEI budget to safety and policing “Some members of the board of trustees, which voted for the divestment, cited students’ recent anti-war demonstrations as a reason for the redesignation of funds to the campus police.”
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What a stupid fucking rule, guess immunocompromised people are just supposed to die?
In the article it says that immunocompromised people spoke during the public comments on the bill and Republican senators said that the bill would criminalize their wearing masks but they just won’t be prosecuted for it.
So the law would demand it, but the “trust me bro, I got yo back” defense says to ignore what the law actually says?
Okay, I think I will.:-P
Pretty sure a SCOTUS justice said that they can’t trust prosecutors to not do this just a month ago.
Yeah, that’s just simply not how laws work… and even if they did, for a time, people could forget and prosecute later, bc that’s what the law says to do.
I think I missed that one. Got a case name for it?
Trump v. United States
https://www.supremecourt.gov/oral_arguments/argument_transcripts/2023/23-939_f2qg.pdf
CHIEF JUSTICE ROBERTS: Well, that’s what I – I mean, shortly after that statement in the court, that – court’s opinion, that’s what they said, but there’s no reason to worry because the prosecutor will act in good faith and there’s no reason to worry because a grand jury will have returned the indictment. Now you know how easy it is in many cases for a prosecutor to get a grand jury to bring an indictment, and reliance on the faith – good faith of the prosecutor may not be enough in the – some cases. I’m not suggesting here.
What a fucking incoherent word salad.
GPT 2.5
So instead of just having cancer, you’ll have cancer and be a criminal.
That’s a much smoother way to become a criminal than by committing an actual crime, kinda convenient.
AKA you’ll be removed from the voter pool of you wear it.
Sounds like Florida’s law about Mexicans, and then poof, all the Mexicans left Florida.
Translation: don’t worry about it if you are a cishet white Christian.
If they die, there will be no additional fee.
If God loved them, he wouldn’t have assembled them all jacked up!
They’re fascists, so unironically yes.
This is how you sue dumbasses who pass this law
I have strongly held religious beliefs that compel me to wear a mask whenever the fuck I want.
Yeah… but their religion says that yours doesn’t count and only their beliefs matter.
Funny how that shit works…
Rational arguments don’t usually work on religious people. Otherwise there would be no religious people.
What about as a political statement? Isn’t that still protected speech? You republicans made masking/not masking a political act, don’t blame me.
Someone should try wearing a “Trump 2024” mask and see what happens
A bill written by representative I. N. Fluenza
Do viruses control our Congress critters like the brain worms do?
Yes, RFK accidentally revealed he had a brain worm when his died and he regained control. I’m sure his goa’uld will be replaced soon.
I reflexively down vote the term “congress critters”. It is basically the same as the “tea party”. It tells everyone how little you understand things.
Just a stupid term wielded by folks to eventually let the worst amongst us yield control. Them critters gonna get us! It’s not a system of representative democracy where we elect those to represent us! They are critters!
They’re just a bunch of critters! Not people, not criminal actors, just a bunch a squirrels!
I reflexively downvote anyone who types the word “downvote” into their comment. It typically reflects how much of a bitch the commenter is.
I have a similar rule about people who say “updoots”
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Cool. Good for you. Substance matters how?
On a side note, you need more beets and less Schnapps.
FREEDOM means having GOVERNMENT OFFICIALS make HEALTH decisions for YOU!
DId someone say Obama Death Panels?
Operating rooms are about to become interesting.
My guess is Operating rooms would be considered private, but EMTs… They clearly operate in public.
Sounds like it would conflict with the ADA.
What about for purely fashion reasons?
Also illegal. Don’t worry though, the KKK is specifically listed as a group that can apply for an exemption. The reason that’s in there is because every version of the bill that explicitly listed the KKK as an organization that can’t apply for an exemption failed. I know this sounds like insane hyperbole and not something that actually happened, but that’s the state of things.
The Onion can’t keep up with reality anymore
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Halloween is going to be interesting this year.
“I’m not wearing the mask for health reasons. I’m cosplaying someone that doesn’t want to get ill from a respiratory communicable disease.”
Silver lining: it will be a lot harder for cops to go undercover and pretend to be “Antifa” now.
Just in time for the avian flu.
Now that avian flu is available in hamberders, masks only get in the way of eating. So, still irrelevant and illegal.
Somebody please fire those legislators.
And prosecute them for reckless endangerment and spreading infectious disease.
On the one hand, at least the Patriot Front have to show their faces now.
Oh ho ho, where have you been that you think they’ll hold their own side to this standard?
If you think this law will apply to their neo-nazi proxies I have a bridge to sell you.
