Like “does the Pope shit in the woods?” or “that train has sailed?”

Also, what good examples can you think of?

    • @[email protected]
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      402 months ago

      See also as related:

      https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mondegreen

      A mondegreen (/ˈmɒndɪˌɡriːn/ ⓘ) is a mishearing or misinterpretation of a phrase in a way that gives it a new meaning.[1] Mondegreens are most often created by a person listening to a poem or a song; the listener, being unable to hear a lyric clearly, substitutes words that sound similar and make some kind of sense.[2][3] The American writer Sylvia Wright coined the term in 1954, recalling a childhood memory of her mother reading the Scottish ballad “The Bonnie Earl o’ Moray”, and mishearing the words “laid him on the green” as “Lady Mondegreen”.

      and

      https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Malapropism

      A malapropism (/ˈmæləprɒpɪzəm/; also called a malaprop, acyrologia, or Dogberryism) is the incorrect use of a word in place of a word with a similar sound, either unintentionally or for comedic effect, resulting in a nonsensical, often humorous utterance. An example is the statement attributed to baseball player Yogi Berra, regarding switch hitters, “He hits from both sides of the plate. He’s amphibious”,[1] with the accidental use of amphibious rather than the intended ambidextrous. Malapropisms often occur as errors in natural speech and are sometimes the subject of media attention, especially when made by politicians or other prominent individuals.

      • sp3ctr4l
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        2 months ago

        Though this is not for idiomatic phrases, there’s also misnomer, for when something is named in a misleading or inappropriate manner.

        Though, different dictionaries seem to give different scope to what can and cannot be considered a misnomer, and others place different emphasis on precisely how the name is wrong qualifies it as a misnomer.

        Cambridge lists ‘dry cleaning’ as an example, a process that involves liquid and is thus antithetical.

        The focus is on something being named such that the obvious, plain reading of it implies the precise opposite.

        Merriam Webster lists that its a misnomer to call a farmer a peasant, which is not antithetical but more along the lines of being rude, out of date.

        Their conception of it is fairly broad: any name that is inaccurate for basically any reason, or even just a word that has offensive connotations due to inaccuracy.

        Dictionary.com uses the examples of Chinese Checkers, a funny bone, and hay fever.

        They focus the definition on the factual/historical inaccuracy of the term:

        Chinese Checkers did not originate in China, a funny bone is actually a nerve, not a bone, and hay fever is not caused by hay, nor is it a fever.

        • @[email protected]
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          -62 months ago

          Cambridge lists ‘dry cleaning’ as an example, a process that involves liquid and is thus antithetical.

          Ehhh…man, I dunno about that example, Cambridge. Like, wouldn’t sweeping involve cleaning something? Vacuuming?

          • Rhynoplaz
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            42 months ago

            That’s not “Dry cleaning”

            • @[email protected]
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              -82 months ago

              No, but if they’re going to assert that cleaning involves liquid, they would be counterexamples to such an assertion.

              • Rhynoplaz
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                92 months ago

                “dry cleaning” is a specific term for a method of laundering clothes that DOES require a liquid, but not soaking the clothes in water.

                Those things you mentioned are not counter examples, because they have nothing to do with “dry cleaning”.

                That’s like if I point out that peanuts aren’t actually nuts, and you respond with “but walnuts are nuts!”

                Yeah, walnuts are nuts, but that doesn’t have anything to do with peanuts and whether or not they are nuts.

              • @[email protected]
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                32 months ago

                They are focusing on the dry part of the term. Using a liquid during the process goes against the dry part.

                • NielsBohron
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                  -12 months ago

                  I would tend to disagree with the Cambridge example, because liquids can be dry. “Dry” liquids are anhydrous, meaning they’ve been treated to remove any water.

                  Source: Am chemist and I teach O-Chem, which frequently uses dry solvents, like anhydrous acetone.

      • @Mango
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        32 months ago

        Bone apple tea!

    • @jakemehoff11
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      182 months ago

      Good pull. Malapropism has always been one of my favorite words and comedic devices, so this is good info. Bravo!

      Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m gonna go read an article about the Women’s Lubrication movement and eat my hot astronomy on rye.

      • Gumby
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        42 months ago

        That’s my favorite one to use

    • Billiam
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      342 months ago

      I can’t believe you got such a simple saying wrong. It’s not rocket surgery.

      • Otter
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        32 months ago

        I need to start using this one, I already use “burn that bridge” fairly often

  • @Gingerlegs
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    382 months ago

    My buddy and I have a whole list of these…I started calling them masonism’s because he messes them up so often lol

    “I don’t give a shit if he wrote the Mona Lisa!”

    “I’m not attached to my hip!”

    “I’m taking my own life…into my own hands!”

    “How’s that for apples?”

    “There’s not enough meat to play with”

    “That’s a hit…and a miss!”

    “If it weighs anything to you….”

    “Jesus Christ! That’s slave robbery!

    “Welp, I’m going to get hard at work”

    “I’m making shit up out of my ass.”

    “He was flopping back and forth” (flip flopping)

    “I’m going to go tell this kid a piece of my mind…”

    “Oh, here you go….you’re going to piss on my parade!”

    “Don’t count your chickens before they turn into eggs.”

    “Well isn’t that the horse calling the kettle black”

    “Does a fat kid shit in the woods?”

    “I can sleep through a rock!”

    Ibanez AZ series guitars? Yea I know them like they’re in the back of my hand…”

    “There’s a lot of onions to that…”

    “I’m pulling it off my head”

    “Knock the balls off!

    -knock it out of the park/socks off

    “That’s a double sided sword!”

    “You can’t lead a horse to fish…”

    • @ChonkyOwlbear
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      162 months ago

      “Well isn’t that the horse calling the kettle black”

      I love this.

    • Rhynoplaz
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      92 months ago

      “Welp, I’m going to get hard at work”

      Umm… Yeah, that TOTALLY never actually happens to me either.

      • @Klear
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        42 months ago

        I can’t get hard at work because there’s not enough meat to play with =/

        • Rhynoplaz
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          62 months ago

          There’s not enough meat to play with because I can’t get hard at work!

          Ahh! It’s a Catch 22!

    • sp3ctr4l
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      52 months ago

      Arguably, a mechanic who is literally performing maintenance on exceptionally mechanically dense and complex parts of a rocket, say the rocket engine plumbing or wiring harnesses… is figuratively performing rocket surgery.

      • @[email protected]
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        32 months ago

        Or, taking a different perspective:

        https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/1433409/

        Management of trauma and emergency surgery in space

        As on Earth, the major determinant of emergency surgical care in spaceflight may be the presence or absence of a well-trained surgeon.

        Sounds like they need a rocket surgeon!

    • Bahnd Rollard
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      22 months ago

      Now, that one does have its place. I either it in an ironic sense that you dont need multiple degrees to do something. The flip side is that the people we send to space tend to be the most qualified people in multiple fields, a medical surgeon with a stem degree does not sound too far outside the realm of reason.

  • Rhynoplaz
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    272 months ago

    “I could care less”

    • @Postmortal_Pop
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      72 months ago

      I like, “get two birds stoned with one bush” as some bastard amalgamation of “kill two birds with one stone” and “a bird in the hand is worth two in the bush”

      • @afk_strats
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        22 months ago

        Two stones with one bird

  • @[email protected]
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    222 months ago

    “It’s not rocket surgery.”

    This one irks me. Combination of “rocket scientist” and “brain surgery”.

    • @Donebrach
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      122 months ago

      Nothing holds a bar to this as being my favorites, but I generally don’t pay much mind to idioms—they’re all water under a duck’s back.

    • @bitchkat
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      12 months ago

      It’s just people combining “it’s not rocket science” and “it’s not brain surgery”. Just like the pope one.

  • @[email protected]
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    142 months ago
    • The grass is always greener in the hand.
    • You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t look it in its mouth.
    • We’ll burn that bridge when we come to it.
    • Caught with his pants in the cookie jar.
    • @Klear
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      52 months ago

      That last one… goddamn, that’s amazing.

  • Seraph
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    132 months ago

    “Not the brightest cookie in the crayon box” is an amalgamation of 3 different sayings I’ve been trying to make happen. It won’t happen.

    • @davidgro
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      72 months ago

      My mom was fond of “Not the brightest egg in the drawer”.

    • @gedaliyahOP
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      52 months ago

      I used to say not the sharpest cookie in the jar

    • @[email protected]
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      22 months ago

      I do it in danish, but we have the idiom here too. I’ll often make up a new one following the not the x y in the z template. E.g. Not the loudest spoon in the forest.

  • @cabron_offsets
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    122 months ago

    One of my standbys is “that horse has sailed”.

  • @thenextguy
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    112 months ago

    I’m running around like a chicken with its legs cut off.

    • @Klear
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      22 months ago

      Reminds me of my friend once saying that “the discussion leads nowhere. It’s like the snake biting its tongue”

  • @bitchkat
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    112 months ago

    It’s not rocket surgery.

  • ShurtBert
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    102 months ago

    “The blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb.” Meaning contracts, friendships, and keeping promises should take priority over family loyalty.

    Now changed to “Blood is thicker than water” and means the exact opposite of the original.