• @[email protected]
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      232 months ago

      I tried real hard, but I got born into lower middle class by mistake. My bad, I should’ve tugged harder on my bootstraps while I was an incorporeal potentiality.

  • Mayor Poopington
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    752 months ago

    I don’t even buy avocado toast, I should be a billionaire by now

    • @[email protected]
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      372 months ago

      That’s your problem. If you never buy it in the first place, you can’t stop buying it. You can’t save nothing from nothing!

      Here, let me help you out:

      1. Be rich
      2. Squander your money on avocado toast and greater luxuries
      3. Stop squandering your money on these things
      4. Now you’re rich.

      If you don’t do 2., how can you expect 3. to work?!

  • masterofn001
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    492 months ago

    My father has not gifted me the bootstraps made from billions in exploited labour, but the exploitation of coffee producers tastes like I’m already there.

  • @Heisenburner
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    452 months ago

    the primary habit of successful people is fucking over ignorant poor people who don’t realize they’re being fucked over

    • volvoxvsmarla
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      182 months ago

      I get the feeling that the ultra successful also fuck people over who very well do realize that they are being fucked over

      • @woodenskewer
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        2 months ago

        I was just at a depressing job fair trying to recruit for maintenance. It was held at a plant set to close in 3 days. Most of the people I talked to were there for 30 years. It was partially employee owned. Somehow a person in power (I don’t know the piece of shit’s title) convinced the employees to sell their share at the promise of expansion and investment.

        The person in power closed the shop, cashed out, and retired. Will not have to worry about a thing. 200 some people and families now have their lives upended at the benefit to few.

        This kind of aligns more with the person you responded to but still relevant.

        • @Buddahriffic
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          12 months ago

          Shit like this is always on my mind when I think of how better things would be if the economy was set up in a way that employees were paid with both money and equity in the company they are a part of. The main difference would likely come down to the employees at least getting a share of the sale proceeds when someone else wants to buy the business and liquidate it.

          Though I’d hope that most would at least hold out and not take the first big offer.

          But I don’t think that a majority vote should be enough to liquidate a business. If just one share wants to keep going, other shares should only have the option to sell their own shares or try to buy the holdout out.

    • NutWrench
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      92 months ago

      Also, make sure you own at least one media giant. Then, you can use it to spread agit-prop about how our society shouldn’t do anything that inconveniences rich a$$holes.

  • @[email protected]
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    2 months ago

    It’s less a lack of willingness - I’m just never presented with opportunities to massively defraud corporations

    • AwkwardLookMonkeyPuppet
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      332 months ago

      You don’t defraud corporations, that’ll earn you the scorn of powerful people. You defraud poor people.

        • MyTurtleSwimsUpsideDown
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          42 months ago

          But it’s more fun because you get to make more of them.

          /s, because last time I didn’t, people took me seriously…

      • @[email protected]
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        82 months ago

        Oh, you can defraud shareholders as well. You just have to tell more compelling lies and secure the right accomplices. Get the auditors on board and you can ride the sinking ship for at least a couple years before you finally run out of cash and the entire organization collapses within a matter of days.

        • @[email protected]
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          22 months ago

          You don’t stay for years. You smash and grab and bounce to your next gig immediately after getting your quarterly bonuses for unsustainable business practices.

    • @JordanZ
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      32 months ago

      deleted by creator

  • @fne8w2ah
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    342 months ago

    Or what about having rich parents or relatives?

    • @ladicius
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      282 months ago

      Step 1: Be rich.

      Step 2: Don’t be unrich.

  • partial_accumen
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    152 months ago

    If anyone is curious if the girl was buying a single $5 coffee per day, contributing that $35 into a basic S&P 500 fund each week, and doing so for 2 years she should have about $4500 in her account. Now, if she’s buying coffee supplies at a grocery store to replace buying it at take out , we’d have to subtract the cost of coffee supplies from the $4500 to know how much she truly saved making coffee at home.

    • @telllos
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      112 months ago

      Providing she doesn’t spiral into a coffee hobby.

      • @IMALlama
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        12 months ago

        Stay away from espresso and super “high end” artisan beans and you can have a very solid coffee hobby for not a whole lot of $$. We do a mix of drip, French press, and cold brew. The cost per cup is basically the same for each and the equipment was not very expensive.

      • @Karjalan
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        142 months ago

        Usually people eat some food and drink some water, as well as the coffee, during their day

        • مهما طال الليل
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          12 months ago

          Yes, but just one? By noon I am already on my third cup with two or three still left to be had over the afternoon and early evening.

    • @IMALlama
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      32 months ago

      You got me curious, so I did the math for us.

      I am a drip coffee person, drink far too much coffee (40 oz) throughout the day, and work on a fairly large corporate campus so I have easy access to hot/fresh coffee that I can purchase. Even though there are multiple branded places to get coffee from on campus, they have similar pricing.

      • Small (12 oz): 4x @ $2.65/pop = $10.60/day
      • Medium (16 oz): 3x @ $2.95/pop = $8.85/day
      • Large (20 oz): 2x @ $3.25/pop = $6.50/day. This is obviously the cheapest choice, but will result in a cold bottom half of the cup due to drinking my coffee slowly vs pounding it

      My wife and I split a pot of coffee. It takes us 3 oz of coffee beans to brew it. I can buy a 20 oz bag of the coffee beans we use for $15.29, which works out to $2.30/pot. We often stock up on the beans when they go on sale, but I don’t know what we paid for them the last time around.

      So… since my wife also drinks coffee let’s say that the price spread between purchased already brewed coffee vs brewed at home coffee is between $6.50-$10.60/day. Splitting the difference = $8.85. Doing that 365 days/year = $3,120 saved.

      The fact that I have coworkers who drink a similar quantity of espresso based (more $$) drinks at work is insane.

      Do this over a 25 year career, invest the money monthly ($260), plan for a conservative 5% rete of return and you’ll have $162,577 - only half of which is principal.

      Apply this pattern of thinking over a number of different spending categories and you’ll be way better off financially. That said, the stats on the billionaire class are eye watering and no amount of frugality will catch any of us up to them.

        • @IMALlama
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          22 months ago

          Ha, this is true as does amortizing things like the coffee maker that needs replacing every 5 years, white vinegar for monthly descaling, the Stanley thermos I bought 4 years ago to bring coffee to work, etc.

          Let’s say that it takes 15 minutes to brew the pot of coffee at 1,500 watts. That’s 0.375 watt hours. At $0.20/kwh that’s $0.075/pot. Yay for dumping it into a thermos once it’s brewed.

          All in, even if you added an extra $0.50/day brewing at home is still way cheaper.

    • volvoxvsmarla
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      12 months ago

      I calculated that if I only drink coffee at home I spend about 1000€ a year on it.

  • Diplomjodler
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    122 months ago

    Have you tried having rich parents?

  • @someguy3
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    112 months ago

    Must go cheaper: caffeine pills.

    • @Death_Equity
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      92 months ago

      Caffeine powder. The best part of waking up, is snorting rail of FDA certified caffeine. You WILL have to explain some things to HR, but they will trust your explanation because of everything else in your HR binder.

  • @HowManyNimons
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    82 months ago

    I’ve been smashing my own avocados like a chump!

  • madjo
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    72 months ago

    Just get a small loan of a few million bucks from your dad!

  • @RangerJosie
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    42 months ago

    The key to the Massive Fraud strategy is that you have to already be in the tax bracket that allows for privileges like massive fraud. If you try to do it without meeting that lone prerequisite you end up being arrested by the IRS.