• @LouNeko
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    210 hours ago

    If a knife isn’t meant to cut my own wrists, why am I holding it a perfect arms length away?

    Check mate arteries 😏

  • @PugJesus
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    713 hours ago

    Me, an intermittently suicidal person, when holding a big knife: “No one is around - cut through the air like a sword so it makes that neat ‘wooshing’ sound”

  • @[email protected]
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    fedilink
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    714 hours ago

    The only thing stopping me from cutting myself with my kitchen knife is the fact that I insist on all my kitchenware be only used on vegan products

  • JaggedRobotPubes
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    514 hours ago

    My knife just says weeeee when it cuts vegetables.

    Different brands maybe?