Art by caanantheartboy

  • @Lost_My_Mind
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    444 days ago

    If this ever became cannon, it would mean smurfette isn’t necissarily the huge slut everyone assumes the series paints her as.

    See, the theory going is that for every 1 male smurf besides papa smurf you see, it means smurfette had sex, got pregnant, and delivered birth.

    Now since we don’t know much about smurf births, we don’t know if it’s like humans, where it’s 1 at a time, or if it’s like animals where 12 might pop out per round.

    Somehow though, despite not being human, the going assumption is that it’s a 1:1 ratio of pregnancies to births. If that’s true, that means she’s had sex and given birth something like 35 times. All from Papa Smurf.

    Which brings up the age issue. That would mean Papa Smurf was fucking this girl since she was pre-puberty age. And since the assumption again is that everything the smurfs do is human like, including aging, that would mean Papa Smurf is currently like 75 years old. And the rest of the village would be in their teenage years to their early 20s depending on the smurf.

    It also means smurfette was like 10, and papa smurf was in his late 50s at the youngest, but more likely in his late 60s when he began fucking smurfette.

    But if this comic becomes canon, all of that can change. First of all, it would mean not only are smurfs mutants, but also there are more females than just smurfette. It also implies that the village is artificially keeping smurfette small in size.

    It also suggests that the other female smurfs didn’t die. They abandoned their village.

    So you begin to ask yourself why. And my thought is that papa smurf runs a controlling environment, much like the taliban, that’s meant to control smurfs, and keep them in line.

    However if male smurfs leave the village, nothing happens. But if female smurfs leave the village, they gain independence, intelligence, and become human size.

    So that means smurfette didn’t birth the current group of smurfs. It means she just hasn’t run away yet.

    It also suggests that the controlling nature of the smurf society conditions the large female smurfs to emotionally seperate from their past. Having no fond feelings of the village, or their problems.

    Mystic could EASILY kill Gargamel, and save smurf village, but as shown here, she’s instead killed far more xmurfs herself than Gargamel is ever have shown to.

    It also suggests there are other unseen female smurfs out there in the world. Which would suggest that they’re prone to either hiding, or possibly blending in with humans so far.

    • @[email protected]
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      4 days ago

      Cool story, however, the Smurfs actually reproduce asexually and Smurfette was made by Gargamel to destabilize their society by encouraging sexual competition.

      Yes, there’s a lot to unpack there, however, my general interpretation is that it’s because Gargamel is a weird loner who thinks things like that.

      • @dohpaz42
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        194 days ago

        If Gargamel created Smurfette, it’s also possible he created the other Smurfs; including Papa Smurf. Maybe he created them, and they rebelled against his evil ways, or he had a master plan of some kind that they ruined and he holds a grudge for it.

        • @ripcord
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          4 days ago

          It’s weird that people keep acting like there wasn’t actually source material for this stuff and that we know this didn’t happen.

          I mean, at least according to Peyo. It’s all fiction and people can make up whatever shit they want of course.

        • sp3ctr4l
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          4 days ago

          I have zero knowledge of … Smurf lore…

          But could it just be the case that ‘female’ smurfs are sort of like self inseminating plants?

          The last ‘matriarch’ passed away, or fled, and Smurfette is the only one capable of birthing another generation, but the ‘male’ smurfs could all just be ken dolls, sexually inert but societally useful as workers.

          Then Papa Smurf is just the eldest remaining ‘male’ smurf.

          The socio gender dynamics just happen to roughly emulate human society, but the underlying sexual structure of the species is dramatically different.

          The males would then be interested in Smurfette mostly for the status of being beloved by basically the one they must all protect to continue their species, they would be as capable of sex as a Ken doll.

          It would explain why they collectively really really want her to stay … which is still manipulative and controlling, but at least does not necessiate literal sex slavery. Just… non coital brood mare slavery.

          Thats … at least a theory that afaik may not contradict with any lore (which i admittedly know nothing of) that allows for a sustainable smurf population that does not involve sexual abuse?

        • @[email protected]
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          44 days ago

          Or maybe Gargamel is God and the Smurfs are “fallen angels”. Papa Smurf is the Devil! Gargamel is trying to round up demons

          • @dohpaz42
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            24 days ago

            Oh I like it. I kinda believe that to be the way of Judaism: “God” is not the good guy, and the “Devil” is actually the good guy trying to free us from servitude.

      • @surewhynotlem
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        64 days ago

        It’s an anti-jewish allegory with Christian purity morals.

    • @camr_on
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      164 days ago

      papa smurf runs a controlling environment, much like the taliban

      I almost choked

    • @devfuuu
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      33 days ago

      There’s so much hen-tai potential here that I’m almost convinced to go do the research.

  • @Etterra
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    84 days ago

    Only if Mystique goes on a bloody rampage and slaughters all the smurfs.