• Skua
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      811 month ago

      Henry Cavill is jacked enough to count as at least three

      • @[email protected]
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        61 month ago

        No, no, he’s just a little elf prince. Never worked out a day in his life, no sir. Probably a vegetarian.

        • Skua
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          31 month ago

          To be fair if I was going to depict an elf prince with a hobby of bench pressing trees, he’d probably look a lot like Cavill’s Geralt

          I like to think he has a bear as a workout partner, and every nearby dwarven society has a secret training program to try to identify someone that can beat him in an arm wrestle

      • scops
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        91 month ago

        Is Pedro Pascal generally pretty jacked? I remember him looking buff for Game of Thrones and he’s probably getting into Marvel fit for the F4 movie, but it seems like he leans more towards trim or dad bod, depending on the role. I’m thinking of Last of Us or maybe the second Kingsman movie.

      • @[email protected]
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        1 month ago

        Markiplier is athletic?

        Edit: I looked at some pictures and the guy must have started working out because he clearly wasn’t in that kind of shape when I was watching him ten years ago!

        • @SkyezOpen
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          11 month ago

          Did you find the… Charity pictures?

    • @[email protected]
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      331 month ago

      Its so funny because this meme is just the flipped version of guys not knowing what “no makeup” actually looks like.

      • @[email protected]
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        1 month ago

        “Just want a nice normal looking guy like Henry fucking Cavill” lmao. I have no skin in the game being happily married, but hitting the gym/doing sports is still good for you regardless.

    • Pennomi
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      121 month ago

      Muscular never really hurts, it’s just not the most important feature.

      • @[email protected]
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        1 month ago

        Let’s just write it out: Cover your body up with a look that is on the fashionable end of normal, but have a fit body underneath to reveal.

  • @lepinkainen
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    701 month ago

    The “line cook” is fucking jacked tho

    • @nepenthes
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      31 month ago

      That does nothing for me; gimme Dad Bod though ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

    • @Donkter
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      31 month ago

      The classic “I just want a normal body” and the normal body they’re talking about is one on TV that takes a full time job to maintain.

  • @[email protected]
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    391 month ago

    Another less serious thing: backing up the “girls don’t need muscle hunks” with pictures of a bunch of famous actors, several of which are definitely jacked, is not proving the point you want it to.

  • Jo Miran
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    361 month ago

    Depressed middle-aged appeal is apparently a thing. Never in my life was I hit on more (by women and men) as I did when I hit my forties and my hair turned gray.

    Come to think of it, that diagram is super accurate. When I was in my teens (elvish) and twenties (line cook) it felt like was living in a sex avalanche, but when I hit my thirties, I became invisible. Thirties doesn’t meet any of the three criteria.

    • @[email protected]
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      251 month ago

      Can confirm. Skinny numetal kid in my teens, too many kitchen and bar jobs in my 20’s and now mid 40’s on Zoloft and apparently old goth dads are on the menu.

      Cheers man. May the well never run dry.

    • @[email protected]
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      101 month ago

      Thirties doesn’t meet any of the three criteria.

      Math checks out. Had all my relationships in my 20s. Haven’t had a single one in my 30s and I’m going on 38 now.

      • Pennomi
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        261 month ago

        He was fuck on in his twenties, and then fuck off in his thirties. We already established that.

  • ShaunaTheDead
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    241 month ago

    Let’s see if I can guess everyone here, from left to right, top to bottom:

    1. the guy from the TV show The Bear
    2. Eddie from Stranger Things season 4
    3. Legolas from I’m gonna guess that still is from Return of the King
    4. Jack Black from School of Rock
    5. Markiplier?
    6. Geralt from The Witcher TV Show
    7. Pedro Pascal’s character from The Last of Us, I think his name was Joel?
  • ShaunaTheDead
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    181 month ago

    I was just talking about this recently. There are of course some women who like muscle men or assholes, but most women are attracted to men who make them feel safe and/or make them laugh. If it is about looks, they’re probably just looking for a slender/chubby guy who has a caring/funny/brooding kind of look about them.

    Also! Looks can change as you get to know someone. A person who was initially hot as hell can become revolting if their personality sucks, and vice versa, someone that didn’t really stand out to you could become literally the hottest person in the universe if their personality rocks!

    • AwkwardLookMonkeyPuppet
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      101 month ago

      And buff. Most of those guys are buff and well above average attractiveness.

  • AwkwardLookMonkeyPuppet
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    141 month ago

    That line cook is a muscle hunk if you haven’t noticed. He’s a straight-up bodybuilder.

  • @[email protected]
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    111 month ago

    I see this sentiment all the time and it always bothered me, but I only recently realized exactly why: you’re not talking about the same thing as the cis straight guys.

    You don’t have to be that attractive to find love. Plenty of ugly people have relationships. Just be yourself, dress well, don’t say stupid things etc then go out and meet people and you’ll probably meet someone you vibe with. But that’s not really what the cis straight guys are talking about. They want to put less effort into having a sex life. They want to walk into a party and have women approach them. They want to feel conventionally attractive. Best way to do that is to be somewhat muscular.

    • @ameancow
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      31 month ago

      Best way to do that is to be somewhat muscular.

      And even then, guys, really get your fucking expectations and entitlements and just like, take them and shove them all into a duffle bag, squeeze any fragile ego you might have laying around in there too, and just throw that thing down a well and forget about it.

      Seriously, if you can just “let go” of all the things you wish you had involving dating and relationships, and just learn to enjoy life and enjoy being around people, you will be a thousand, million times happier than the dudes who spend all their time trying and even succeeding to get laid when they want it.

      If what you’re doing is frustrating you and making you unhappy… change. That’s your greatest power, just change. Go somewhere else, change what you want, change who you are and be genuine about it. (When you stop caring, it also has the bonus effect of making you cool, and thus wildly attractive to people who get to know you.)

  • @HeyThisIsntTheYMCA
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    111 month ago

    As a former line cook who got married during his elf prince years, I have now gained enough flab to be moved to the depressed middle age father circle.

    Explains a lot about my dating life tho

  • @[email protected]
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    51 month ago

    Whoa whoa! Hey there’s only so many girls with Daddy problems to go around man.

    And look- people can pull off the skinny elf look but they can’t pull off Orlando Bloom.

    Also who’s in the middle top?

    • @[email protected]
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      21 days ago

      And look- people can pull off the skinny elf look but they can’t pull off Orlando Bloom.

      Hell, I’ve tried to do both. All it got me were some pants I can’t return and a restraining order. C’est la vie, I guess.

  • @[email protected]
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    51 month ago

    It’s less a out being buff and not ea out signaling that you have enough of your shit together to do something healthy for yourself. Most of y’all fail that bar and wonder why you’re alone.

  • HubertManne
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    31 month ago

    My wife is very practical. See she wanted a faithful husband and really took chris rocks advice to heart.

      • HubertManne
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        61 month ago

        the particular chris rock advice are you asking? If so its, a man is as faithful as his opportunities. When she saw me walk into that scifi convention with my fully socked crocks and live long and prosper t-shirt. She knew she had found the one.