Summary

Owners of Return to Nature Funeral Home in Colorado, pleaded guilty to 191 counts of corpse abuse after nearly 200 decomposing bodies were found at their facility.

The couple, Jon and Carie Hallford, admitted to defrauding families by taking payments for burial or cremation services they never performed, sometimes substituting concrete mix for ashes.

They also admitted to a related federal conspiracy to commit wire fraud, including $800,000 in COVID-19 relief fraud.

Sentencing for both state and federal cases is scheduled for 2025, with each facing up to 20 years in prison.

    • @pyre
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      1 day ago

      but if they waited the free market would make sure competition would kick in and solve the problem ✨magically✨

  • Nougat
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    252 days ago

    She’s got that Amy’s Baking Company face.

    • @Nutteman
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      2 days ago

      Its that suburban trophy wife face. I grew up in a suburban labyrinth and so many of my friends’ moms looked exactly like this.

        • @Nutteman
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          52 days ago

          Yeah “trophy wives” as a concept is really weird anyway. I know it can have misogynistic uses as well, I prolly should have used quotes the first time

    • @Khanzarate
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      92 days ago

      Not convinced it’s not her.

      Tweak the story just a bit and you get Sweeney Todd though, that’d be an interesting take.

      • Admiral Patrick
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        72 days ago

        Now you got me wondering again lol

        Well, it seems like Amy’s Baking Company has not survived the test of time. According to Kitchen Nightmares Updates, the bakery closed in 2015 after its owners found a new buyer for the business. In response to a question posted on X (formerly known as Twitter) about the business closing, Amy’s Baking Company confirmed the news, tweeting, “Yes! Now we can focus on several other projects!”

        Source

        • @EmpathicVagrant
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          52 days ago

          Wasn’t that one revealed to be a front for money laundering or something?

          • Admiral Patrick
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            62 days ago

            I vaguely recall rumors but have never looked into it to be sure. That said, it wouldn’t surprise me. But its equally plausible they’re just horrible business owners.

  • @[email protected]
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    162 days ago

    What was the plan here? Surely they had some idea of what they were going to do with the bodies?

  • magnetosphere
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    142 days ago

    Lemmy has been very interested in this story, which I’m grateful for. I’ve been able to follow it since the beginning. Thanks, OP!

  • RubberDuck
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    1 day ago

    And these fucktards did not even have the frame of mind to rent a backhoe, and a wood chipper and get these bodies done in an afternoon.

  • ✺roguetrick✺
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    2 days ago

    Really, the sentences are going to be concurrent and I think the fraud conviction will likely be much longer than whatever the corpse thing is.

  • gingerman
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    62 days ago

    I just finished listening to a podcast about a very similar situation, it’s a great listen. It’s called Noble for anyone interested.

    • AmidFuror
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      52 days ago

      Wasn’t there a case in Georgia where the furnace used for cremation broke down and they didn’t fix it?

      • @[email protected]
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        82 days ago

        It wasn’t broken. He just didn’t use it. He dumped 339 bodies in the woods behind his crematorium. It took years for anyone to find out.

        • @[email protected]
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          9 hours ago

          I feel like that would’ve smelled really bad, and there would’ve been flocks of crows and vultures hanging around.

          I don’t know, maybe I’m just super sensitive to the smell of death or something, but one decomposing mouse can stink up a good portion of a warehouse. If he was too lazy to cremate them, I doubt he was throwing garden lime down.

          Strange situation.

        • magnetosphere
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          22 days ago

          I forgot the number was that insanely high. 339! WTF, dude!

          I guess that after the first one, it just gets easier to think of the bodies as mere things instead of human remains that deserve at least token respect.

  • Kokesh
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    32 days ago

    Well… they did what they promised, returned them to nature

      • @RizzRustbolt
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        22 days ago

        Packed in barrels with extra-dimensional fluid to turn them into demon midgets?

      • Kokesh
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        12 days ago

        I thought it was the case with dead bodies being dumped in the nature around the place.