• magnetosphere
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    82 days ago

    “Attention prosecutors: we have to drop all charges. We just found out that this guy wrote a letter to the government asking for paperwork that doesn’t exist, so now he’s immune to all laws ever. Thanks for your hard work anyway. Oh, and for those of you who are working in the prosecutor’s office for college credit, YES, your work still counts. Thanks again.”

  • @JigglySackles
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    2 days ago

    Fucks sake, they can’t write one clear sentence. Stupidest mother fuckers alive. Any fewer brain cells and they wouldn’t have to manually breath and beat their hearts.

  • @[email protected]
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    42 days ago

    This one isn’t technically a sovcit, but he’s pretty close. He thinks the phrase, “I don’t answer questions,” is a magical incantation that imbues him with immunity from the law. Ranting about illegal arrest and being a USA citizen. I mean, just look at his beard and stache. This guy will be a sovcit in a handful of years.

    When TikTok Legal Advice Gets You Thrown Out of an Airport

    • @BonesOfTheMoonOPM
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      21 day ago

      Oh he’s definitely on his way. There are many paths to sovcittery.

  • @IphtashuFitz
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    152 days ago

    Why do these people think that literally everything boils down to a contract of some sort or other? And ones that nobody has ever seen, aside from their own chicken scratch?

    • @MothmanDelorian
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      52 days ago

      Because the entirety of Western political thought operates under the notion that we agree to rule. Sovcits don’t see the nuance there so they think everything is a contract and with a wave of the right wand they can magik themselves out of legal situations.

    • @[email protected]
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      52 days ago

      Because they misinterpret the term Social Contract and think there are similar “hidden” contracts everywhere?

  • @Sludgehammer
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    393 days ago

    …brain is cooking.

    I mean, not gonna disagree.

  • @[email protected]
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    202 days ago

    How do these morons not cotton on to the fact that not once has any of their nonsense ever worked?

    • @BarbecueCowboy
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      102 days ago

      Every once in awhile some official somewhere is just like… fuck, I don’t get paid enough for this and just moves on. The 1% with a singular success story holds up the entire community.

    • @shalafi
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      62 days ago

      It’s because the law is wildly complex to a layman. They see magic happening when a lawyer cleverly applies the law and think they can be clever as well. A word or a phrase can make or break a case.

      Recent example; NY State charging Luigi with terrorism. People thought the state was tacking on a bullshit charge. Well, kinda. A terrorism charge is the only way state law allows a charge of first-degree murder (in this case).

      tl;dr; People see technicalities applied, think they can learn this without going to law school.

  • Endymion_Mallorn
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    253 days ago

    I’m sorry, but this doesn’t make sense to me. I genuinely don’t understand the point of this.

    • @BonesOfTheMoonOPM
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      82 days ago

      Well that makes two of us. Aren’t the machinations of their brains something else?

      • Endymion_Mallorn
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        32 days ago

        Sometimes, yes. Some of it, I understand the point - and sometimes when I understand, I don’t disagree.

    • Nightwatch Admin
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      123 days ago

      You sound like Charles Babbage:
      “On two occasions, I have been asked [by members of Parliament], ‘Pray, Mr. Babbage, if you put into the machine wrong figures, will the right answers come out?’ I am not able to rightly apprehend the kind of confusion of ideas that could provoke such a question.”

  • Nougat
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    183 days ago

    WTF is “due performance” and FOIA doesn’t apply to private companies.

    • ignirtoq
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      213 days ago

      When they say “two corporations” they’re talking about the federal and state governments they referenced earlier.

      It’s part of a conspiracy theory that the US government is actually a corporation (and I guess state governments now, too?). The original theory I heard was that they never actually got the 16th amendment to the constitution ratified, so in order to levy income taxes on US citizens they secretly converted the federal government to a corporation and by having a birth certificate you are an employee of the government, rather than a citizen of the country. That’s of course all made up and doesn’t make any sense when held to 2 seconds of scrutiny, but I’ve met more than one person who believed it completely.

    • Noxy
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      63 days ago

      At least when Beavis and/or Butt-head cook up a scheme they can explain it well enough!

  • @[email protected]
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    183 days ago

    “Hey, give me this information!”

    “lolno”

    “… SUDO give me this information!”

    any if all

    (⊙_⊙)?

    spoiler

    i learnt what sudo does from xkcd i have no knowledge of my own

    • federal reverse
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      2 days ago

      sudo means switching to another user account with different permission settings before performing a command. Usually, people use it to switch to the admin account (root) but any account is possible. On Ubuntu (and distros configured like it) sudo can be used from the primary user account without entering a password.

      So, xkcd’s sudo make me a sandwich example would thus only work if there was a higher power/authority that could more or less control Cueball’s friend. Also, Cueball would have to be able to become/impersonate that higher power/authority. Checkmate, atheists?

      • @[email protected]
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        22 days ago

        I’ve dabbled in network stuff since reading the xkcd so I do know slightly more than just sudo make me a sandwich but not enough to confidently make that dumb joke without fear of offending the entire Fediverse. I appreciate the explanation :)

  • @[email protected]
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    113 days ago

    Send a letter to congress? Like…the whole thing?

    And that’s the most coherent part about this whole…brain slop.

    • @son_named_bort
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      22 days ago

      And also the State of _____, like the whole state? How do you send a letter to the state itself?