A bill proposed to the Ohio statehouse will make male ejaculation without intent to have a baby, a fineable offense of up to $10,000.
The bill has been proposed by State Representatives Anita Somani and Tristan Rader, who wrote it to point out what they see as the absurdity of rules that control women’s bodies but do not control men’s. It has not been formally introduced to the House Floor yet.
Per Somani and Rader, men would face a $1,000 first offense, $5,000 second offense, and $10,000 subsequent offense fine to “discharge semen or genetic material without intent to fertilize an embryo.”
We could pay down the national debt in about 4 hours.
A lot of men will need
bankspank loans.New business opportunity!
New fintech startup, Wankr, provides loans at 2400% to pay your wank-fines.
…Now to get $300 million in Series-A funding.
A few nation’s debts
They should quit trolling and start resisting. Gesture politics is a displacement activity.
I mean tbf the GOP has a supermajority in the Ohio House so there’s probably not much she can do other than trolling.
Not true. She could take a page from AOC’s book and inform the people of their rights and how to resist the fascist administration AND troll the fascists for their ignorant reactions.
Ohio voters recently passed a constitutional amendment guaranteeing abortion rights, so writing that bill here is certainly mostly a signal to national politics.
Also, I had a vasectomy, so would I still be able to wank away under the proposed bill? lol
Also, I had a vasectomy, so would I still be able to wank away under the proposed bill? lol
Required, actually. With mandatory minimums for both frequency and duration.
mandatory minimums
duration
…fuck.
Better get to practicing! I hear thinking about your grandmom playing baseball has a 50/50 chance of either being helpful or very traumatic…
Fair enough.
How about proposing actual progressive legislation that would help her constituents, and calling out the Republicans who oppose it?
Agreed.
I get what they’re doing, but they can look at the stats and see that Trump has broadened his coalition, in part, because of the fashionable hate directed toward men by people who consider themselves progressive, and stupid shit like this just adds gasoline to the fire.
Seriously, I’m so tired oh these “Gotcha! Look at how hypocritical they are!” gestures. They’re empty and a complete waste of time.
They. Do. Not. Care.
Less this. More beating the shit out of their opponents with canes like the old days.
I’ll never financially recover from this.
Every sperm is sacred:
I’m already several hundred thousand in debt.
These performative bills are so dumb; you can’t shame the shameless. Republicans are open hypocrites. You think they care about this?
Push laws for actual protections against people being hurt
Absolutely will not happen in Ohio, the only way the statehouse could do anything beneficial for it’s citizens would be to have a massive gas leak
They are too busy hurting people.
They aren’t trying to shame anyone. They are just trying to get thier own names on the news. You mistake these poloticians for people who care about others.
This isn’t performative. It’s part of the plan. Porn and non-nuclear child-rearing families are absolutely in the crosshairs once they clear out the judicial “interference” and suspend habeus corpus.
Here’s the introduction (aka “Pillar I”) to the plan currently being implemented: https://static.project2025.org/2025_MandateForLeadership_FULL.pdf
Some highlights:
From page 20 of the project: “Vought (officially in charge of OMB after being confirmed recently) writes that the White House Office of Management and Budget (OMB) should establish a “reputation as the keeper of ‘commander’s intent,’””
From page 21: " In Chapter 1, former deputy chief of staff to the President Rick Dearborn writes that the White House Counsel “must take seriously the duty to protect the powers and privileges of the President from encroachments by Congress, the judiciary, and the administrative components of departments and agencies.”
Page 28: “When a new President takes office, he will need to decide expeditiously how to handle any major ongoing litigation or other pending legal matters that might present a challenge to his agenda”…“, the President should hire a counsel with extensive experience with a wide range of complex legal subjects. Moreover, while a candidate with elite credentials might seem ideal, the best one will be above all loyal to the President”
Page 32, regarding the office of presidential personnel (DOGE): “Playing “bad cop” in a way that other White House offices cannot (including serving as the office that takes direct responsibility for firings and hirings).”
Tell me you didn’t read the article without telling me you didn’t read the article.
This bill was introduced by two Democrats to highlight how all these policies are being enacted by Republicans that target women but not men.
Well thats 10x worse if you actually read the goals of the project.
You wrote all that in response to an article you never read?
Which is great until you remember that the religious right is okay with that idea
It’d legitimately be hilarious if they introduced it on the House floor and the general response was, “Oh, yeah, this is perfect!” and it somehow passed.
Hilarious, but awful. This has cursed monkey paw wish written all over it.
I don’t live in the USA, so I would be very amused to see these things pass.
It’s already happened. Not this exact bill, but a “inception begins at ejaculation” bill. Forget which idiot Congressman proposed it.
I believe they actually did it before these people started to attempt to use it to troll people.
No, all of these bills are satirical. Dems are doing it in a few states to point out the absurdity. https://www.nbcnews.com/politics/politics-news/mississippi-lawmaker-introduces-contraception-begins-erection-act-rcna188938
I thought that the first one I read about was a Republican, but it’s definitely possible that I’m misremembering.
Yah, the at times almost universal male genital mutilation in the US goes back to religious nutjobs like Kellog & co to stop boys from masturbating. It’s also what motivated Kellog, in his quest for the blandest food, to invent cornflakes, because, apparently, spicy foods make you naughty. Good Glob, I wish I was kidding.
As well as with homosexuality. People should definitely learn about the history of sodomite. Gang bangs of pastor were a thing.
Every sperm is sacred,
Every sperm is great.
If a sperm is wasted,
God gets quite irate.Fucking Spoogspeare over here
More like a Monty Python.
Same difference 🤷
And now for something completely different…
The name seems like it has to have also been a dick joke, but I looked it up and apparently not.
Differing, somewhat confusing accounts are given of the origins of the Python name, although the members agree that its only “significance” was that they thought it sounded funny. In the 1998 documentary Live at Aspen during the US Comedy Arts Festival, where the troupe was awarded the AFI Star Award by the American Film Institute, the group implied that “Monty” was selected (Eric Idle’s idea) as a gently mocking tribute to Field Marshal Lord Montgomery, a British general of World War II; requiring a “slippery-sounding” surname, they settled on “Python”. On other occasions, Idle has claimed that the name “Monty” was that of a popular and rotund fellow who drank in his local pub; people would often walk in and ask the barman, “Has Monty been in yet?”, forcing the name to become stuck in his mind. The name Monty Python was later described by the BBC as being “envisaged by the team as the perfect name for a sleazy entertainment agent”.[24]
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Their bill has some exceptions, as it says men in Ohio will not be fined if they are using birth control, donating sperm, masturbating, or having sex with another man or member of the LGBTQ+ community.
The bill is specifically aimed at men having straight sex without protection who do not then create a baby. (emphasis added)
all the listed exceptions will be declared illegal in separate legislation.
I haven’t read the article yet but I’m really not understanding what they’re even trying to dissuade here… Like what tort are they even punishing in their twisted little minds?
EDIT okay right away the article adds some much needed context:
The bill has been proposed by State Representatives Anita Somani and Tristan Rader, who wrote it to point out what they see as the absurdity of rules that control women’s bodies but do not control men’s.
It’s like a protest bill.
Thank you.
That’s wild
Would be nice if we had an actual opposition party to, you know, put in bills to oppose the massive abuse of power that’s been going on for a while now. Instead we get frumpy faces, folded arms, an occasional angry letter, moral victories, and of course the “that’ll show 'em” bills.
the fake christians of America prove why freedom of religion also means freedom from religion.
the term “moneyshot” gets a whole new meaning
Pro gooners are fine because they never cum /s
That just makes having a wank more thrilling, getting close knowing you’re about to reach a 100 grand fine that day.
America, edging its way to a theocracy.
I can’t wait for it to pass
So, what you’re saying is I can move to Ohio, open a sperm bank that charges $100 per deposit, and make a mint?
Maybe I’m OOTL, but what is the appeal to pay $100?
So that you could legally ejaculate, paying $100 rather than paying much more as a fine.
if they pass this law, people would go out jerking off everywhere in protest
I mean, what about people with vasectomy? Do we just get the death sentence?
There would be a national day of gooning.
