You gotta poop. Badly. You go to the public restroom, there’s a person at the counter digging in their bag. They see your face. You can’t leave. That’d be weird. You go into the stall and sit. You now have to, somehow, sit on the toilet and not shit until they leave because the person has seen your face and will know what you did. They take MINUTES.
The end, sorry for the cliffhanger. You now feel like my poop, clinging to the edge.
Screw that, if I’m in a bathroom I’m going to poop. If somehow someone takes issue with or is offended by that, then that’s their problem NOT mine
The bathroom is for shitting and pissing. Just do your fucking business, wash up, and go on with your life.
Fuck that. I will make you regret spending too long in the bathroom. You’re in my world now.
“I’m not stuck in here with you …”
I feel no regrets for anyone that takes a stall next to me and dares to stay on the phone.
They’re gonna know what you’re doing, and you’re going to know what I’m doing. Loudly.
Look through the stall door crack , find and maintain eye contacts as you start to grunt loadly to maintain dominance.
If this was a mistake, please don’t correct it. “Grunt loadly” is perfect in this situation.
Yeah it was. my phone gets silly with autocorrect sometimes.Grunt loadly it is.
This was my best friend’s response too lmao
Leave the stall door wide open.
Broaden your stance. Square your shoulders. Maintain a professional demeanor. Continue making firm eye contact.
If you shit in your own hand it doesn’t matter what your stance is when you throw it at them.
Hey man, idgaf. If the stall’s available and I’m in the red zone, I’m gonna go in there and commit a war crime if I need to. If you like to dick around and waste your time in the men’s room, that’s on you.
Hmmm
Office culture be like
