• ZeroCool
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    1 year ago

    Tomorrow’s headline in Variety:

    Ben Shapiro rumored to be in high-pitched talks to play all seven dwarfs in anti-woke version of Snow White 90 minute conservative temper tantrum.

    • @Riccosuave
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      131 year ago

      high-pitched talks at 5000 words per minute*

      FTFY

      • @BourneHavoc
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        11 year ago

        It’s the high speed that lets you know he is right, and that the full-speed gish-gallop that runs over you is legitimately discourse…

      • Bob Robertson IX
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        401 year ago

        Yet they’ll still do incredibly well because the movie makers can launder money through churches, tax free, to buy all available tickets to give out for free to the church congregations. This then makes the movie appear to be better and more popular than it really is.

      • @RememberTheApollo_
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        291 year ago

        You can’t criticize the movie without criticizing the message. If you criticize the message you’re not on their team. Not conforming to the team is a bannable offense.

        • @Not_Alec_Baldwin
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          81 year ago

          But you can oh, so easily criticize the movie without mentioning the message. Because they are awful.

        • The Barto
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          61 year ago

          It’s easy, when script writing is worse than a high school play, they’re either over filtered to look cinematic or feel like they just filmed it and cut it together. I’ve seen better acting in b grade porn than anything I’ve seen in one of those movies, the sounds terrible like they’ve used the in camera mics on scenes.

          See I criticized the movie without criticizing the message.

      • sik0fewl
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        -71 year ago

        Sounds like they already have their own version of Hollywood then.

      • @Pasta4u
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        -231 year ago

        We talking Hollywood or daily wire?

        Hollywood has had a 100 years to get good st making movies and around 90 years in they forgot how. Daily wore has only.has a few years. Maybe in 80 years they will start making good movies

        • @Sanctus
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          281 year ago

          No they won’t. Because the message in their movies is always racist or bigot shit.

          • @Pasta4u
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            -341 year ago

            Like current Hollywood movies

            • @BassTurd
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              191 year ago

              How disconnected from the real world are you?

              • SuperDuper
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                131 year ago

                Karma is -165. It’s a troll account.

            • @Sanctus
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              71 year ago

              O’ thy father who art in heaven, help us! The mermaids are black!

              Come back to me when movies feature songs like “What Makes The Red Man Red” again.

              Unfortunately, both of these examples are Disney.

              • @Pasta4u
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                -151 year ago

                I was speaking more to the misandry in thier films

                • @Sanctus
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                  61 year ago

                  Yeah I don’t see that outside of chick flicks. Unless you’re pissed Ken got kicked to the curb.

      • TinyPizza
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        291 year ago

        His alive and very much female doctor wife with whom he shares an address of residence. Checkmate.

        • @[email protected]
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          1 year ago

          She’ll do her own dishes, without the help of the animals, and never leave the kitchen. The Dwarves will be coal miners who pull themselves up by their bootstraps every morning and work 20-hour days. The prince will be a Trump impersonator who plays in a worship band and “wakes” Snow White by giving her a red pill.

  • katy ✨
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    371 year ago

    I think it’s funny that Ben Shapiro failed as a Hollywood nepo baby. Do you know how much of a failure you have to be to do that?

    OTOH Kudos to Ben for giving Ben in a wig a job

  • Zerlyna
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    271 year ago

    Sadly this probably still won’t anger the Hispanic vote.

  • Margot Robbie
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    261 year ago

    Well, Ben, since as an almost forty year old grown man, you seem REALLY upset at a certain recent movie for being too “woke” or whatever, let’s see how well your movie does as a failed screenwriter with a failed actress.

    I’m not going to start throwing tantrums or burn anything, I’m just going to laugh at you in private.

  • @kromem
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    1 year ago

    Ah yes, Snow White and the Seventh Reich, a beloved children’s story about how a mirror that considered an underage girl to be hot got her roofied and then taken advantage of while sleeping by the dude with the most privilege who instead ends up celebrated for rescuing her from her laborer immigrant household.

    Honestly even without any alterations to the core plot this clearly has all the hallmarks of a conservative hit on their hands.

    A little Triumph of the Will cinematography and some dog whistles thrown in, and they can’t help but get everyone on Parler to buy a few copies each. (Literally, as the people there are suckers waiting to be parted with their bitcoins.)

  • TinyPizza
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    181 year ago

    Being so wrong about the reception and mind shattering profits of the Barbie movie done gone made Benny Shaps a might bit parched for some of that movie moolah sizzurp in his real boy diet cola. I would actually watch this if it got pirated and entirely redubbed with Robert Evans doing all the characters voices as Ben.

    • Chuymatt
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      111 year ago

      Ok with one change: H John Benjamin as Snow White’s voice actor.

      • TinyPizza
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        51 year ago

        Crap, I wanna say yes, but you know he’s gonna swing for the fences with the Boston accent and it might lessen the weight of the many Ben impressions. That might have to be the directors cut version.

    • Billiam
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      41 year ago

      No, you’ve gotta have Cody Johnston and Katy Stoll in there too!

  • @7112
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    171 year ago

    So… a movie featuring a sleeping girl getting woken up for her happy ending is too woke?

    • 520
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      71 year ago

      It’s more a backlash against the Disney ‘remake’…in quotation marks because rather than remaking it, it just sounds like they just did their own thing completely.

  • @Veedem
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    141 year ago

    Let them waste the money. A spite movie is pretty funny though. Straight out of Curb Your Enthusiasm

    • @[email protected]
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      11 year ago

      Looking at the trailer, it seems pretty obvious they’re not actually making this movie. It shows a single character for about 10 seconds of footage. My guess is they’re doing this strictly for the headlines.

  • @Ensign_Crab
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    91 year ago

    I thought Bob Clampett already made the right’s preferred version of the story.

    • Flying SquidOP
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      51 year ago

      Oh no, I think all of us really want them to make their own movie. I know I can’t wait to see them fuck that up.

    • @ougi
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      11 year ago

      I just don’t get the joke they’re trying to make, like… Ben in a wig doesn’t seem like a serious attempt at this, but I’m not even sure who it’s supposed to be hitting.

      • @[email protected]
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        -31 year ago

        They’re getting real close to the appearance of the Disney version, which isn’t public domain.

        • @[email protected]
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          61 year ago

          I’m not really sure how. Per the story, she has red lips, pale skin, and dark hair. Otherwise, there’s not a huge overlap between this and the classic Disney versions, unless I’m missing something

        • Poggervania
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          51 year ago

          Actual question: would that even be something in court? I would imagine the filmmakers of this Snow White could say her design is “inspired” by Disney’s take on Snow White, but otherwise say it’s “original”.

          • MoogleMaestro
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            1 year ago

            No. I think that anybody can make a spin of Snow White if they want to which is why Disney spent a lot of their 90s in making unique IP that simply “borrowed” plot elements from famous plays. (The Lion King, for example.)

            • @drekly
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              31 year ago

              Like kimba the white lion?

                • @drekly
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                  31 year ago

                  Holy shit that is long. I’ll give it a watch while I’m working. I looked at the similarities at university studying animation 17 years ago, so I’d be interested to see what been dug up!

          • @MeekerThanBeaker
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            21 year ago

            Snow White… they can get away with as long as it’s not the same basic outfit. I know they can’t use the names of the dwarfs. Those are Disney created. They would have to come up with new names and identities.

            They probably never read the original story so they may not know that. Could get sued if they have incompetent creators and lawyers who don’t check up on that, then use the same names.

          • @[email protected]
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            11 year ago

            I have no idea, I’m just spitballing, IANAL, etc. Just something I’ve noticed is to never fuck with the mouse.

          • @[email protected]
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            11 year ago

            Courts definitely make decisions like that. There’s a news story every few years about a court ruling that some big name musician ripped off a more obscure one, usually followed by music experts explaining why it’s not at all unlikely for different musicians to independently come up with the same baseline, chord progression, etc.

    • ripcord
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      1 year ago

      What would they sue over…?

      It’s a 300-year old story and a ton of Disney movies that come out are accompanied by like 4 dollar bin clones