so drop 'em if you got 'em

  • @GraniteM
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    1111 months ago

    A man walks into a bar with an owl on his shoulder.

    He says to the bartender “I bet you a hundred bucks this owl can talk!”

    The bartender accepts and tells the man to prove his claim.

    The man turns to the owl and says “Who gives you water and lovely owl food every night?”

    The owl answers “H’you!”

    The man asks the owl “Who was the President of China from 2003 to 2013?”

    The owl responds “Hu!”

    The man asks “What’s the greatest British rock band of all time?”

    The owl promptly answers “Who!”

    The bartender has had enough of this nonsense and he throws the man and his owl out of the bar.

    As the two of them are sitting in the alleyway, the owl turns to the man and says “Led Zeppelin?”

  • anon6789
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    1111 months ago

    I apologize ☺️

    • FuglyDuckOP
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      1511 months ago

      not nearly as bad as:

      Knock, Knock!
      Who’s there?
      Ducks.
      Ducks who?
      No, ducks quack – owl’s hoo.

      • anon6789
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        411 months ago

        Lol you masochist! 😆

        • FuglyDuckOP
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          511 months ago

          I’ve developed a high tolerance… my nephew just started reading not-picture books, so I got him a science-themed joke book.

          Guess who loves showing off his reading skills?

          • anon6789
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            411 months ago

            If it’s funny the first time, it’s gotta be funny the tenth time!

            I remember those times!

            • FuglyDuckOP
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              11 months ago

              It is kinda funny… when you teach them a poop joke and sick them on the parents who absolutely don’t get the humor…

              (Orange you glad I’m looking for owl jokes?)

              • anon6789
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                111 months ago

                I always look forward to when the kids get to the pool and pee joke stage. They just find anything with those words soooooo funny even if it makes no sense. I always feel like a star comedian when they’re in that phase!

      • @Late2TheParty
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        311 months ago

        Hahahaha OHMYGOSH I’ve always said this as

        Knock, knock Who’s there? Cowsgo Cowsgo who? … You can see where I’m going.

        I’m glad to see others have a funnier takes!

  • FuglyDuckOP
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    9
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    11 months ago

    Knock, Knock!
    Who’s there?
    Hoo.
    Hoo who?
    You sound like an owl.

  • nifty
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    511 months ago

    Two owls are invited to a party, one of them didn’t want to go because didn’t want to be around a lot of people. The second owl says “Hey, it’s just a small group of us, and we can always leave early”. They go, food is tasty and drinks are chill, host is nice. Some barn owls crash the party. First owl says, “Oh great, now it’s a hootenanny”.

  • @[email protected]
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    511 months ago

    ‘When I was out the other day, I hurt my leg when an owl attacked me!’

    ‘Tawny?’

    ‘No, actually, it went for my thigh!’

  • @x4740N
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    511 months ago

    Well yeah, owls can’t speak

    • anon6789
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      211 months ago

      That’s because they get stageflight.

    • FuglyDuckOP
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      211 months ago

      what do you call a Murder Mystery written by an owl? A Who-dunit