• @taanegl
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    10 months ago

    Texas when they realise they’re suddenly part of Latin-America.

    The CIA:

    • Cicraft
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      410 months ago

      What defines a country as latin american? I thought it was speaking a romance language, like Argentina, Brazil or Quebec

      • @ThatWeirdGuy1001
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        810 months ago

        I thought it was the parts of the American continents that were originally settled by the people of Latin based languages

        • Cicraft
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          510 months ago

          Would that include Louisiana?

            • @Telodzrum
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              610 months ago

              French is a Romance Language.

              • @ThatWeirdGuy1001
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                10 months ago

                Y’know sometimes my stupidity is almost frightening.

                Seriously though I took French in school I have no excuse lmao

        • @taanegl
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          210 months ago

          Latin-America is the geo political equivalent of a bully victim, the bully being the US. I refer you to all the sanctions, embargoes, government coups, etc.

          If Texas somehow manages to secede, it becomes Northern Mexico.

  • @DucktorZee
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    9010 months ago

    Wouldn’t it be great if the US started relocating it’s military bases to other states? I’m sure NM, MI or CA would be happy to have them.

    • @rockSlayer
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      11610 months ago

      That’s already happening, because the draconian antitrans and anti-abortion laws are impacting readiness in those states and driving down recruitment.

    • theotherone
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      5510 months ago

      Oh you mean the 42 town-sized forward operating bases inside the treasonous province? They will come in very handy in the 72 hours it takes to resecure that territory.

      • peopleproblems
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        2410 months ago

        I always wondered how quick that would go down.

        72 hours seems quick, but I guess they wouldn’t really encounter actual resistance.

        • @kautau
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          3210 months ago

          Yeah “muh guns” are pretty useless against predator drones and air support

        • PugJesusOP
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          1610 months ago

          We did Baghdad in a month; we could do Austin in three days.

          • @raynethackery
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            1310 months ago

            Barring the State politicians, I thought Austin was majority Democrat?

            • PugJesusOP
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              1310 months ago

              Probably, but nothing makes a statement like taking a regime’s capital.

                • @Viking_Hippie
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                  10 months ago

                  Both of which are much better for the world than the current main industries of Texas: fossil fuels and fascism.

              • @bitwaba
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                210 months ago

                Houston is the 4th largest city in the country, and generates a shitload of oil revenue. That’s way more important than Austin.

            • @[email protected]
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              110 months ago

              makes it real easy to justify liberating it then, doesn’t it? most of the people living there want to remain part of the US.

      • @dlpkl
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        510 months ago

        Do people really think that the servicemen in the military would willingly attack Texans? I have a huge suspicion that they’d revolt within the armed forces.

        • wanderingmagus
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          1410 months ago

          As someone currently serving active duty, yes - depending on the command climate and the servicemember. Especially if the targets are labeled as insurgents and a VEO threat with credible evidence. Now, bombing noncombatant civilians is a different story, but as far as conducting surgical strikes on domestic terrorists, no hesitation.

    • @snekerpimp
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      1810 months ago

      Would love to see what they would do to the ones they leave to “decommission” them

      • @[email protected]
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        2610 months ago

        If it’s anything like the rest, they just leave toxic fuel spills to slowly seep into all the aquifers

        • PugJesusOP
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          3110 months ago

          Perfect. Texas loves not having environmental regulations, so there shouldn’t be any issue!

          • @kautau
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            2510 months ago

            lol their power grid is already so fucked that key strikes against it would leave them wondering if it was part of the combat or if it had just failed of its own accord

    • don
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      10 months ago

      And here I thought Texas had all the guns guess I was wrong

      • @seejur
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        610 months ago

        Ohhh… they DO have all the guns. It’s a pity those gun range is not enough to shoot down all the very busy b-22 though

  • Pandantic [they/them]
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    5210 months ago

    Tell them it’s for their own good! They don’t even have an electrical grid that works properly!

  • @EtherWhack
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    5010 months ago

    I imagine if the US wanted to, they could embargo it, and most if not all other nations would just see it as a parent putting a 6yo to the corner; not their job.

    • @NegativeInf
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      1710 months ago

      Break us up into 5 states. Houston, Dallas, Brownsville, El Paso, and Austin!

    • CurlyWurlies4All
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      110 months ago

      I think plenty of little desert countries have recently proved that the biggest military in the world might have some issues dealing with insurgencies.

      • cheesepotatoes
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        10 months ago

        True. Imagine how much more successful a Texan insurgency force would be compared to the middle east. Their armored division would be formidable, the thunderous roar of hundreds of mobility scooters.

  • @[email protected]
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    410 months ago

    We aren’t seceding, we promise. Sure it’s interesting as a thought experiment. Texas has lots of things similar to developed nations, some of which many other states don’t like international airport, excessive land, military bases (not sure on the comparison here), several industries including a huge chunk of the petroleum industry.

    I think it’s silly to pretend it would happen though, are we unhappy with the federal government? Sure, who is honestly pleased with how things have been trending lately, or even the past couple decades? But we have issues with our local government too, so it’s not like it would be all sunshine and sweet tea if we didn’t have the rest of the U. S.

    • @MadBigote
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      910 months ago

      But the military bases are USA owned… If they leave the US, no more bases…

      • @[email protected]
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        310 months ago

        The USA has bases all over the world, there’s even one in Cuba (which I’ve never understood)

      • @hydrospanner
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        310 months ago

        Exactly

        If anything that’s an immediate foothold and for Texas, a serious defensive liability, not an asset in any way.

        Not that anything will ever come of this, but if Texas were to violently secede, it’s highly likely that the US could put down the secession, occupy and assume control of the territory, and manage the forced reunification of same…

        …all using only the US military forces already within the borders of Texas.

        Again, not that it’s actually going to happen, but in a just world, we’d let them do it, then occupy the “rogue state” and re-annex them, but as a territory.

        Basically nothing changes for the citizenry except they lose the impact of the vote. Texas now gets one non-voting member in each chamber of the legislature, and send no electors to Washington for presidential elections.

        They should also lose the ability to govern themselves at the state level and instead, affairs within the territory are managed by a joint panel of provisional military government working together with state department officials and UN observers.

        While they’re at it, let the US seize and nationalize all corporations, which now roll all profit back into reimbursing the American taxpayers for their trouble and expense of dealing with this Texan nonsense.