• @[email protected]
    link
    fedilink
    686 months ago

    Take our honeymoon straight away. We decided to wait and take our time to plan a big trip after we got married, which was in November 2019…

    • @[email protected]
      link
      fedilink
      56 months ago

      Wife and I got married in between lockdowns in the UK. We were able to have 4 people there, our witnesses and our photographer and my witness’ wife. Would have liked to have had a few more people there, and a proper bachelor party, and a honeymoon of any kind…

    • @[email protected]
      link
      fedilink
      56 months ago

      Yeah same, we took a mini trip on the way home from the wedding, with plans to do a huge trip “soon”. With our lifestyles we already “need” to travel multiple times a year just for family etc, so taking the time and expense for such a trip just never really works out.

    • @MrVilliam
      link
      English
      36 months ago

      Our wedding was booked at a nice place for April 2020. So we got married in a backyard in September 2020 instead when it was unclear whether things would ever get any better lol. Hopefully you guys got to go away somewhere by now.

    • Revv
      link
      fedilink
      106 months ago

      Same here. There’s plenty I might like to change here and there in life, but absolutely nothing on this front. Celebrating 11 years in a few weeks, best decision I ever made.

      Now, the first time… Well, second time’s the charm, it would seem.

    • @undrwater
      link
      86 months ago

      This. 25 years later, I love her more than ever.

      Moral of the story: no clue. But sexiness was absolutely NOT the magic bullet.

    • @[email protected]
      link
      fedilink
      46 months ago

      Same. It was a great day and it went exactly as planned and as we wanted. Wouldn’t change anything.

  • @[email protected]
    link
    fedilink
    316 months ago

    Take a much more relaxed approach to the whole thing. We were young at the time and so worried about the expectations of our families that we forgot to make it into a fun day for ourselves.

    • @[email protected]
      link
      fedilink
      76 months ago

      Same. If it were just up to the wife and I we would’ve simply gone to the courthouse and signed some stuff but we decided on a ceremony because it was “important to our families” and did things more traditionally than if it were only the two of us. We would’ve had a lot more fun with the whole thing if we could have just realized that the day was for us and about us and should’ve been done our way.

      • @Today
        link
        26 months ago

        We we had been living together for two years and had kids. My mom wanted us to do a small ceremony at a beautiful park near her house but i was resistant. We did the courthouse alone and then just went home. I wish we had listened to her and really celebrated with at least our parents present. Looking back it feels like we made a business transaction out of what could have been a fun, romantic day. Just had our 30th anniversary.

      • @[email protected]
        link
        fedilink
        26 months ago

        I’m on my second (and very likely last) marriage, and that’s what I’ve tried to impress on my kids. I’d like to be there when they get married, even if it’s just a courthouse thing, and after that I have no expectations for what they do. My first kid eloped, and I was disappointed I couldn’t be there, but was still happy for them.

  • loopy
    link
    fedilink
    186 months ago

    I guess not something that I would change, but I’m very glad we started with a marriage counselor. We did not have any overbearing concerns, but it has been immensely helpful in understanding each other and having a healthier relationship. Sometime people get weird and say “Oh no, a counselor, what’s wrong with your relationship.” Nothing. That is the point. Talk to one to get a baseline and when (not if) challenges come up, you don’t have to waste sessions filling them on your back story. Honestly, I think it should be required to do like three sessions before signing the papers, if nothing else to have someone point some things out that youre blind to otherwise about yourself.

    • @[email protected]
      link
      fedilink
      English
      46 months ago

      Yes, I wish we had done this then as well. I also would tell myself what my migraine triggers are, so that I could try to avoid getting the worst one ever the day after the wedding. I started the honeymoon on hard mode, and didnt get to enjoy the initial travel. It took a couple days to subside and then honeymoon was great.

  • nocturne
    link
    fedilink
    186 months ago

    We eloped, and have no pictures. A couple pictures is all I want.

    • @Today
      link
      66 months ago

      We had no pictures either. Renewd our vows 11 years in and took a nice photo.

  • @[email protected]
    link
    fedilink
    156 months ago

    I would have spent more time at my wedding basking in the moment.

    I cared too much being the good host. And I didn’t get to fully be present at the happiness of holding her hand in marriage.

  • @iliketurtles
    link
    146 months ago

    I liked our wedding, but we would probably elope instead in hindsight.

    • @proudblond
      link
      English
      16 months ago

      Sometimes I think this too. But if I was 27 again, I’d still want to do the whole shebang. It’s only with the experience of having done it that I would choose not to do it again. Although it was freaking expensive…

  • @doublejay1999
    link
    146 months ago

    I should have thrown myself in front of a train, instead of throwing myself under a bus.

  • @hedgehogging_the_bed
    link
    116 months ago

    Would have gotten us both mental health drugs and therapy way sooner. Would have had some honest conversations way sooner than we had them. We wouldn’t spend nearly so much time angsting about making other people, especially our parents, happy around the wedding itself because a lot of those things didn’t matter in the long term but took away from our enjoyment of the event for our sake.

  • daddyjones
    link
    86 months ago

    I’d change what I booked for the honeymoon. We went to Turkey and it was too hot and we both got sick.

    I’d have just booked a cottage somewhere nice here in the UK.

  • sylver_dragon
    link
    English
    86 months ago
    1. Pay attention to the hand she gave me to put the ring on. Oh well, not sure anyone noticed.
    2. Tapped the keg much earlier in the day for the reception. I had no idea that it needed time to settle.
    3. Make sure we had someone to get the snacks out while we were taking pictures. Seriously, have one designated person, who is not in the wedding party, handle stuff like that.
    4. Find a different caterer. While the food was pretty good, they missed the vegan plate for my brother-in-law, despite us being really, really certain it was covered. Drinks and water were a disaster. I really think we could have just brought in a fuck-ton of tacos, sodas and water and we’d have been good enough.
    5. Make damned sure the jeweler’s idea of the ring is clearly the same as yours. We had a custom ring made for my wife and I think the jeweler failed to take good notes and the result was bad, very, very bad. We had the ring re-made, after it was presented and before the wedding. Her ring was very nice for the wedding.

    But, not a lot. Sure, the year or so before the wedding was stressful. We did the planning ourselves, put together complex invitations, “save the date” fridge magnets and all the programs. But, because we did give ourselves a year to get it sorted, we had the time to find what we wanted. We had also been living together for a couple years by the time we got married. So, it was more a “ya, we should probably finally do this” than any sort of pressure to “start our life together”.

  • @[email protected]
    link
    fedilink
    86 months ago

    I would have had a local barbecue joint cater the wedding instead of getting a fancy caterer. The food was the most stressful part of our wedding and it wasn’t even that good for the price and trouble.

    Would keep the strawberry shortcake instead of wedding cake though, that was bomb.

    Other than the food I wouldn’t change a thing. I married the right guy and he’s just gotten more awesome with time. And we had a (relatively) low-key wedding to start with so there’s not much I have in the way of regrets.

  • @[email protected]
    link
    fedilink
    66 months ago

    I should have considered leaving my toxic job.

    My wife is absolutely amazing I definitely don’t regret that at all.

  • BlueÆther
    link
    fedilink
    66 months ago

    Not almost cut my thumb off, the fucking thing ached like I don’t know what, espitally while my wife was squeezing my hand during the ceremony.

    That was over 25 years ago and the pain was real

  • @son_named_bort
    link
    56 months ago

    My wife and I went to Las Vegas to get married. In retrospect we would’ve taken a different airline out there. Spirit sucks.