• Jo Miran
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    7 months ago

    I am vacationing in Florida and a few days ago this guy swam up the drain and into the bowl.

    There’s no reason why a snake could not do that.

    • @SkyezOpen
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      447 months ago

      Yeah but it’s Florida, not a civilized place.

      Cute toilet freg though.

    • @aspitzer
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      137 months ago

      a commode toad!

    • Flying Squid
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      97 months ago

      Forget the racism and the bigotry and Ron DeSantis and the humidity and the palmetto bugs…

      For this reason alone, I am never going back to Florida.

      • AwkwardLookMonkeyPuppet
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        67 months ago

        My real question is "did the chemicals in the toilet water make that frog gay or not?

    • @Voran
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      27 months ago

      Squee hes adorable

    • BOMBS
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      27 months ago

      I have lived in Florida 90% of my life. I have never had a frog swim up the toilet pipe or even ever seen a frog in a toilet. How does that even happen?

  • @[email protected]
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    837 months ago

    If you are worried about late marriage you can easily avoid it by going straight to cats and a manfree lifestyle.

    • @Jerkface
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      397 months ago

      Cool, but to make room for the cats I had to flush all my snakes down the toilet. Am I doing this right?

      • @Flummoxed
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        107 months ago

        Oh shit, flush the snakes?? Not the husband??

        • @Jerkface
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          77 months ago

          I don’t see the contradiction.

          • @Flummoxed
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            37 months ago

            Lolololol, good point!!

    • @UnderpantsWeevil
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      157 months ago

      Worst thing for women’s friendships is marriage. Stick with your fellow ladies. Live in a big house together and embrace the sorority lifestyle. Reject the Patriarchy, abandon legal monogamy, and embrace Amazonian thought.

    • @TexasDrunk
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      667 months ago

      Doing it at like 8pm. By the time it’s over and you’re done with the reception it’s too late to hop a plane and go on a honeymoon.

      • @LemmyKnowsBest
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        127 months ago

        OMG yeah, what a nightmare. I hate getting married after 8pm. It’s so inconvenient.

    • nifty
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      57 months ago

      Why wouldn’t someone want to get married late? Like, they’re too old to have kids? If they wanted to kids wouldn’t they get married sooner? Or adopt any time? I think person is just talking about themselves.

  • @celeste
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    287 months ago

    New bottom surgery just dropped!

    • Zammy95
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      117 months ago

      Anyone have any tips on how to un-read a comment?

    • @Flummoxed
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      57 months ago

      This could save Americans millions in health care costs!!

  • THCDenton
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    147 months ago

    Kid on my street got bit on the ass while peeing in the woods and died. Valid fear.

  • @paddirn
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    117 months ago

    Guy, had a similar fear all growing up too, except that I was afraid it’d bite my butthole (no idea why there, but whatever), not sure how I ever got over it.

    • @tacosplease
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      27 months ago

      Let me know if you ever remember how

    • @lugal
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      17 months ago

      Don’t call your future partner “it”

  • AwkwardLookMonkeyPuppet
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    107 months ago

    Spiders swarming out of the toilet and killing me has been in the back of my mind ever since I saw Arachnophobia as a kid.

    • VaultBoyNewVegas
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      27 months ago

      I saw a horror movie as a kid where a guy was killed by something (snake, maybe) when sitting on the toilet. It made me very anxious when using a toilet for a long time. I think the movie was dreamcatcher based on the Stephen king book but I was only 6-7 when I saw that part so I could be completely wrong.

      • @[email protected]
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        37 months ago

        You’re remembering correctly. That’s how the first character dies in Dreamcatcher. Stephen King was recovering from a car accident and was on oxy when he wrote the book if that helps explain anything.

        • Flying Squid
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          17 months ago

          “Car accident” is putting it mildly. He was walking down the road and a van slammed into him at full speed. He apparently went completely over the van and into a ditch. It’s amazing he’s still alive.

        • VaultBoyNewVegas
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          17 months ago

          Thanks. With being so young when I saw the scene I wasn’t sure if I just imagined parts of it.

    • Semi-Hemi-Lemmygod
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      157 months ago

      That’s just Ralph the Toilet Snake.

      He guards the knife.

      • @LemmyKnowsBest
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        17 months ago

        I have a toilet snake. You can buy those at any hardware store y’know.

    • @LemmyKnowsBest
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      27 months ago

      If the snake wasn’t hiding and she saw it, then she was asking for it when she sat down.

  • @Flummoxed
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    77 months ago

    I blame Ghoulies especially because of the cover.

    Honestly thought it was a Gremlins movie cover until now, but man if seeing that in the video store aisle didn’t make me slam the lid on the toilet and run out and slam the bathroom door as fast as I could for several years…

    • @[email protected]
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      7 months ago

      This movie scene had me double checking the toilet before sitting down for at least a decade.

  • Flying Squid
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    57 months ago

    The rat in the toilet in Raymond Briggs’ When the Wind Blows freaked me out for years afterward and I still occasionally get a little freaked out about it.

    Bathrooms make me anxious enough in general as it is.

  • Ech
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    37 months ago

    Easy, just don’t be holding the bad-luck teddy bear while your friends are scamming a magic bank out of some magic batteries.