This is from genius comedian and artist Cris Shapan. Unfortunately, the only way to see his work in any large amount is on Facebook. For those of us who still have legitimate reasons to be there, though, it makes it a little bit more fun.

Cris also works in the entertainment industry as a graphic designer and animator. He what the graphic designer for Baskets and Barry.

  • @ummthatguy
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    402 months ago

    That is one cursed child. Also… Weenus!

  • @MrFloppy
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    2 months ago

    Reminds me of “my first vape” and “happy hour playset” from Adam Padilla

  • @PunnyName
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    132 months ago

    That’s like the opposite of transglutaminase, aka meat glue.

    • Flying SquidOPM
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      122 months ago

      Mm! Transglutaminase! It’s the glue that holds your multi-cow steak together while you grill it!

      • The Snark Urge
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        42 months ago

        It feels like the meat industry is run by a cabal of vegans who thought they could make us change by being horrible enough, but eventually gave up hope and just want to fuck with and poison us now.

        • Flying SquidOPM
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          2 months ago

          There’s nothing poison about transglutaminases. They are naturally-occurring enzymes and they’re inside your own body. You wouldn’t stop bleeding when cut without them.

          It’s just gross that they use it to glue meat from multiple animals together to make it look like it all came from one animal.

          Similarly- pink slime. Edible, just disgusting.

          • The Snark Urge
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            52 months ago

            It was mostly meant in jest, but you could make a case that certain food additives and plastic contaminants from containers are basically poison. Whole food industry is a nightmare.

            • Flying SquidOPM
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              22 months ago

              Fair enough. Some people see a word like that and ‘meat glue’ and they think their meat is being glued together with superglue or something.

  • @[email protected]
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    112 months ago

    This cannot be tolerated, even under Eisenhower.

    I suddenly want to insert this into my everyday life

  • @p5yk0t1km1r4ge
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    112 months ago

    Are you a stupid fuck like me? I initially thought this was a legit ad.

    • @AnUnusualRelic
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      62 months ago

      Given the amount of atrocious products released through the years, it was quite credible.

    • @[email protected]
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      22 months ago

      If you don’t read the small text, it’s believable that this is from a horrifying time in the past when nobody knew any better.

  • @[email protected]
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    2 months ago

    “Beef is loaded with essential protons and electrons”.

    Well, they are technically correct …

    • Bakkoda
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      1 month ago

      People always forget about the positrons and nega… tivtrons…

  • @niktemadur
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    72 months ago

    The Arden Weenus Crusade For Cadmium Hour, Wednesdays at 3:00am on KGFJ 1230-AM Radio Los Angeles

    Now that’s the original infomercials medium and time slot right there.

    As a kid back in the seventies, I remember adults listening to AM radio shows that mentioned the Mayo Clinic a whole lot. But I seem to remember that was a bunch of hours and every night, like maybe they owned the radio station and sprinkled in music and variety entertainment amid constant name-dropping of the Mayo Clinic.

  • Track_Shovel
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    62 months ago

    I know a bunch of environmental risk assessors. You better believe this hit their inboxes at the speed of sound.

  • @niktemadur
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    62 months ago

    A lot of thought and effort - and cackles of mad laughter - went into making this… thing.

    This is the sort of thing that oozes out of the mind during fevered dreams, like with George Miller and “Mad Max: Fury Road”.

  • @psmgx
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    52 months ago

    Mmmmmm heavy metals

  • @PsyDoctah9Jah
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    22 months ago

    " The Hills Have Eyes : The First Lost Colony "