Transcription:

In a park with rich vegetation and several trees sits a couple on a bench, facing away from the reader. The woman leans into her boyfriend’s arm, saying “— AND WE’LL BE OH, SO HAPPY IN OUR LITTLE COTTAGE, DEARIE.”

Everett True is seen sitting on a bench a few metres from them, facing the reader. He is wearing his usual black coat with a dark vest and striped pants. He is holding a cigar in one hand and a newspaper in the other, looking restrained and confounded.

Everett True: “I’D LIKE TO KNOCK THEIR HEADS TOGETHER AND BRING THEM TO, BUT MY DOGGONE CONSCIENCE WON’T LET ME — I WAS YOUNG MYSELF ONCE!”

Transcription attempt by me

  • @dohpaz42
    link
    English
    192 months ago

    I feel the same way as my boy Everett there. No harm in letting those less experienced in life enjoy themselves. They’ve got the rest of their lives to be miserable. 😂 🙃

  • @Fredselfish
    link
    172 months ago

    What’s he mad about? Can’t be lovey dovey in the park?

    • ComradeSharkfucker
      link
      fedilink
      English
      522 months ago

      My guess is that he is jaded and doesn’t think they will achieve the lives they dream about but isn’t rude enough to attack those dreams despite being envious of their hope

      • @stoly
        link
        252 months ago

        This is basically my take. He thinks they are extraordinarily naive but remembers that he was too. He just wishes he could explain it all to them.

    • @TOModera
      link
      222 months ago

      Speaking as a bit of an old fart (41), there are moments when you see younger people being romantic/optimistic in ways that remind you of your youth, and you “know” that it won’t last, because thats what happened to you.

      So these two young people are planning their lives together, but they are young. They most likely will change as time goes on. Thus they will go through pain. I’m a totally diffent person then I was 20 years ago. There’s things I wish I could say to myself (change your major, don’t eat so much pizza, go get medication for anxiety).

      But I can’t really do that to someone who is going through it. Best case they stop taking chances. Worst case, they tell you to fuck off and you can’t help them when they need it. So you let them be happy and think they’ll make it.

      I mean, I’m still with my high school sweetheart, so maybe they will make it.

      • @Fredselfish
        link
        52 months ago

        Well as an older fart than you (44) I am a hopeless romantic, so I am always happy to see lovingly couples. Except when I see couples sitting on the same side of a booth at restaurant. For some reason it makes me turn into Everett True.

        • @TOModera
          link
          42 months ago

          To be fair, two young people thinking they’ll last forever isn’t as annoying as two people sitting on the same side of a table.

          • @Fredselfish
            link
            32 months ago

            Yeah I always wonder how do you have a conversation sitting like that. Only time that is ok is when you have people sitting on the other side too.

    • @AnUnusualRelic
      link
      62 months ago

      Not when you’ve got a lampshade on your head.

      • @Fredselfish
        link
        22 months ago

        That funny didn’t notice that until your reply.