As Elon Musk likes to do whenever disaster hits somewhere in the world, Hurricane Helene was another opportunity to show off his generosity and make himself part of the news. This time, Musk made headlines with a promise that SpaceX Starlink would be free for 30 days to help in places where fiber and cellular infrastructure might have been knocked offline. More than 200 people have been identified as dead in the disaster.

But the catch is that it’s really not free at all. It really looks like not much more than a glorified new-customer promotion.

For one, anyone interested in taking up the offer still has to pay approximately $400 for the dish itself (including shipping and tax) and they’re getting automatically rolled into a $120 per-month contract when the free month ends.

  • @[email protected]
    link
    fedilink
    212 minutes ago

    I’m Glad the man trying to Price Gauge literal DYING People is Poised to have a GOVERNMENT OVERSIGHT ROLE in Trump’s Administration! I’m SURE He will Protect the Middle Class he’s currently Price Gauging during a LIFE ENDING HURRICANE!

  • @[email protected]
    link
    fedilink
    71 hour ago

    You know if the fucker literally just shipped a couple of these to like local government officials and asked them to be installed in libraries or whatever and then gave free internet with the idea that it would be shared access.

    He could probably get all the good will, government officials might buy in for emergency connection access and get more money and people would have all that warm fuzzy feelings of remembering when they joined together and had community and internet thanks to this horse bartering fucker.

    But no, he had to want some extra cash he doesn’t need.
    I don’t get the wealthy.

    • @AnUnusualRelic
      link
      English
      219 minutes ago

      Elon, it’s a great gesture, I’m sure those poor people will be delighted to at least be able to communicate freely.

      It’s nothing, I… Hold on, did you say poor? How about we changed the plan a bit?

  • Flying Squid
    link
    415 hours ago

    (including shipping and tax)

    And I’m sure UPS will get your free $400 internet to you just as soon as services are restored and you won’t need it.

  • @[email protected]
    link
    fedilink
    134 hours ago

    Each time you go outside and look at the sky remember that at last 3 or 4 Elon Musk private company satellites are looking at you. Everywhere you go at any given time.

  • @pacoo2454
    link
    14115 hours ago

    Sounds about right. Rich people don’t get rich by giving away hand outs. They get rich by being assholes.

  • AtomicHotSauce
    link
    English
    4713 hours ago

    He’s in dire need of an aneurysm.

  • @[email protected]
    link
    fedilink
    5115 hours ago

    Fucking hell - Verizon, Sprint and AT&T also, apparently have free Helene deals on offer! And Comcast (or whatever the hell they rebranded too) has six months and their nipple flaps at the ready!

    • @cm0002
      link
      1413 hours ago

      Comcast (or whatever the hell they rebranded too)

      Xfinity, although I prefer my head canon on which they rebranded to Crapcast

    • @Corvid
      link
      English
      114 hours ago

      Who the hell is Sprint?

      • @[email protected]
        link
        fedilink
        514 hours ago

        I’ll admit that I haven’t lived in the US in more than a decade so some of the companies may be out of date - Sprint is/was a large phone carrier.

        • @littletoolshed
          link
          English
          713 hours ago

          They are giving you shit because:

          Sprint Corporation was an American telecommunications company. Before being acquired by T-Mobile US on April 1, 2020, it was the fourth-largest mobile network operator in the United States, serving 54.3 million customers as of June 30, 2019. The company also offered wireless voice, messaging, and broadband services through its various subsidiaries under the Boost Mobile and Open Mobile brands and wholesale access to its wireless networks to mobile virtual network operators.

          From https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sprint_Corporation

          • Flying Squid
            link
            85 hours ago

            Yeah, they sold out to The Man. That’s why I use MCI.

          • @SendMePhotos
            link
            411 hours ago

            They were cool when they had push to talk walkie talkie function.

          • @[email protected]
            link
            fedilink
            412 hours ago

            Fair enough - at least I didn’t put Telus, Rogers, Vodafone or Orange on that list. My brain wanted to… you’ve never known a righteous bitching like complaining about Telus.

  • @[email protected]
    link
    fedilink
    2014 hours ago

    Now it makes me think that he was mad. He didn’t get to build the sub and save those kids because he was going to charge them to get in… Or make them sign away their rights or something.

  • Annoyed_🦀
    link
    fedilink
    3215 hours ago

    Melon Husk went from “I MUST be the one to save the world” to “pay up if you want to be saved”.

  • @halcyoncmdr
    link
    English
    -6613 hours ago
    1. Company offers free service in natural disaster areas.

    2. Internet villifies company for offering free service but not giving away $400 in free hardware to every person as well.

    3. Internet wonders why most companies don’t do anything.

    • @barsquid
      link
      33 hours ago

      Ah, a man-made climate change disaster. Another perfect opportunity for me, the wealthiest person and major contributor to emissions, to advertise. Free* internet, everyone!

    • @A_Random_Idiot
      link
      English
      3
      edit-2
      3 hours ago

      1a. Company quietly signs you up for a recurring 120 dollar monthly fee when you are too otherwise distracted to notice.

    • Flying Squid
      link
      135 hours ago

      Do you think any of the people in need of free internet right now just had that $400 hardware hanging around already? Otherwise I don’t think the ‘free’ part matters much.

      • @halcyoncmdr
        link
        English
        -205 hours ago

        No, but expecting a company to provide $400 in free equipment is also ridiculous. They’re offering free service, which is what they said they were, they never claimed anything more.

        But the anti-Musk circlejerk doesn’t care about anything other than complaining about anything related to him, so this response is 100% expected.

        If they were providing free hardware as well you all would just complain about something else instead.

        • @A_Random_Idiot
          link
          English
          63 hours ago

          Tell me, do you prefer the taste of musks balls fresh out of the shower, or do you like them marinated for a few days?

        • Flying Squid
          link
          7
          edit-2
          5 hours ago

          No, but expecting a company to provide $400 in free equipment is also ridiculous.

          It’s not ridiculous at all. Just like their “free” service, which is only free if you cancel the contract, it can be “free” hardware as long as you return it.

          In fact, that’s how it generally works with ISPs and the modem they provide you with when you sign up for their service.

          • @halcyoncmdr
            link
            English
            -74 hours ago

            In fact, that’s how it generally works with ISPs and the modem they provide you with when you sign up for their service.

            Your Cable/DSL modem isn’t a $400 piece of equipment, and probably sold at a loss at this point given the tech is still new. At best those ISP modems are worth maybe $100, and that’s the marked up purchase price.

            Even then, the ISPs never give it to you for free, they charge you a monthly rental fee for it unless you bring your own.

            • Flying Squid
              link
              64 hours ago

              Your Cable/DSL modem isn’t a $400 piece of equipment

              So what? If they don’t give it back, they owe $400.

              Even then, the ISPs never give it to you for free, they charge you a monthly rental fee for it unless you bring your own.

              Bullshit. Neither the local ISP I am using now nor shitty Spectrum when I had it charged me a dime. When we switched to the local ISP, Spectrum just wanted it back. The local ISP has a hell of a lot less money than any company Musk owns, and yet they can somehow handle giving out their equipment to tens of thousands of customers for free until they are returned.

              • @halcyoncmdr
                link
                English
                -44 hours ago

                Bullshit. Neither the local ISP I am using now nor shitty Spectrum when I had it charged me a dime. When we switched to the local ISP, Spectrum just wanted it back.

                And yet companies like Comcast charge $5+ per month to rent their shitty modem, and will even charge customers who never had a rental modem at all. Your area isn’t indicative of the entire country.

                • Flying Squid
                  link
                  54 hours ago

                  Spectrum literally serves the entire country.

                  If Spectrum can do it, so can Musk.

                  I’m just astounded you are defending marketing this deceptive.

                  “Free as long as you don’t count the $400 initial cost and also you will be forced to pay $120 a month if you forget to go through all the hoops we will force you to go through in order to cancel in 30 days” is not the charitable donation you seem to think it is.

    • @ABCDE
      link
      2412 hours ago

      Free stuff!

      Well, not free, $400.

      Why are you not grateful?

    • @pivot_root
      link
      21
      edit-2
      12 hours ago

      You know those free streaming service trials where you hand them your credit card info, and they give 30 days to forget to cancel it? It’s like that, but with an essential communications service instead of entertainment, 800% the price, advertised to disadvantaged/temporarily-impoverished families, and asking for 5 months worth of commitments in an upfront hardware cost.

      So, yeah—excuse me for thinking Elon Musk is a shitbag profiting off of others’ misfortune while cosplaying as a philanthropist. You know what would be a quarter the price and likely achieve the same thing? Waiting a week and paying AT&T $90 for 100 GB of prepaid data and using my phone as a hotspot.