Ahh yes the old excuse of “I can’t come, the ghost of Hitler is having a nervous breakdown.”
I need to be there for my homie.
…wait
Sorry I can’t come, a professional hockey team gave me syphilis.
The whole HS marching band, eh?
All of it. Including the trombone.
Change it to a college marching band and I’d sign up for that course of antibiotics
Roll 3d10.
What flag is this?
This is going to sound like an excuse, but my tinder date found my box of human teeth…now she wants to show me hers.
I can’t go because Dan Rather gave me syphilis
sounds about right
I can’t go because the Pope posted my nudes on Instagram. Plus a high school marching band died in front of me, but whatevs. They were crap 🤷
Is MAD magazine back?
Yes, actually. They started printing it again just last month, and prior to that they were putting out collections of older material.
Many of these sound pretty believable if you go with the “my Tinder date” option.
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ROFL I would use these only if I were being particularly cheeky to someone that I didn’t like.