• @[email protected]
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    152 days ago

    The big takeaway the casual reader should learn from this is that contrary to the memes it’s not “animals” it’s “crustaceans” and to some extent arthropods.

    Apes won’t evolve into crabs unless we do it deliberately.

  • @expatriado
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    3 days ago

    convergent evolution is such a head scratcher, nature is full of puzzles, like how humans became to dominate this world, yet a human allegedly wrote the title of this post

        • rigatti
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          313 days ago

          TIL why do words keep evolving into titties?

          • DrSleepless
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            273 days ago

            Because everyone likes titties

            • @Tujio
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              233 days ago

              World cold and hard. Titty warm and soft.

  • @[email protected]
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    3 days ago

    It’s the same reason both bats and birds have wings.

    This article is trash. It’s been established for a long time that bats have wings to frighten criminals.

    the tasty king crab that’s coveted as a seafood delicacy, aren’t even technically “true crabs.”

    I’m not ready for this today.

  • @jaybone
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    253 days ago

    Crab people, crab people.

    • @Brickhead92
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      143 days ago

      Taste like crab, talk like people.

    • @pyre
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      62 days ago

      apparently we won’t because we’re not modular enough

  • Flying Squid
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    393 days ago

    They keep evolving into pigs too.

    Peccary:

    Tapir:

        • Lvxferre
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          12 days ago

          They are, just like guinea pigs (their smaller relative). It’s just that the bauplan is rather close to a pig - stubby legs, roundy body, stubby tail.

          I guess that just like non-crustacean peak performance is to become crab-like, mammal peak performance is to become pig-like? Cats*, humans, dogs, we’ll eventually get porcinised!

          *except my cat. She’s a Schweinekatze (pig-cat) so she’s already pig-like. That’s what peak performance looks like!

      • Flying Squid
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        163 days ago

        Thanks, I knew there was at least one more. I feel like there’s something else I’m not thinking of as well but I can’t place it.

        • Lvxferre
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          22 days ago

          Guinea pigs perhaps? I didn’t post them because capy represents them as Caviidae.

          • Flying Squid
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            22 days ago

            I think I was thinking of javelina, but they’re related to peccaries.

        • @expatriado
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          163 days ago

          I feel like there’s something else

          yes, pigs

        • @[email protected]
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          43 days ago

          IANAS, but it sure seems like most of these pig fuckers just went fully off-road genetically as soon as their two main external sphincters formed during mitosis, and focused everything else afterward on that core concept: Eat & Shit. (punctuation optional; creative emphasis, arrangement, spelling, etc. promoted)

        • ddh
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          22 days ago

          I thought it was once every other pig, thanks for the info!

    • @ooliOP
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      3 days ago

      Ok, when we’re at 100 comments about the tittle, I will finally edit it

    • @[email protected]
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      33 days ago

      I like that it kinda implies that animals are spontaneously becoming crab often enough to be a problem.

      • @DokPsy
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        33 days ago

        I mean, when you start categorizing things by phylogenetics instead of phenetics, you realize that certain body plans happen a lot more than expected.

    • @seaQueue
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      13 days ago

      Drill a small hole and you can scratch it

  • @Allonzee
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    93 days ago

    I’ve also heard kangaroos are further evolved, or more distinctly evolved, from our common ancestor than us.

    No claws yet though. Having a biological pocket is cool.

  • Blackout
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    93 days ago

    I want to be one of those crabs that form a conga line and swap shells.