• @[email protected]OP
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    831 month ago

    In the dumbest timeline our future Mad Max style hellscape will be dominated by those who control the eggs rather than oil and gas.

    We must prepare our bodies for the Thunderdome. Thunderdome is the new law!

    • IninewCrow
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      141 month ago

      The Four Horsemen will be … the Egg Man … the Flour Man … the Yeast Man … all held together in an alliance with ‘Oven Man’

  • Nougat
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    811 month ago

    Who has the ability to fence 100K eggs before they go bad?

    • jackeryjoo
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      411 month ago

      “I got a guy for that”

      The guy:

    • @thesohoriots
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      91 month ago

      Bro I got hard boiled, cage-free, and century. I can get my hands on Balut but it’ll take a couple days, and it’ll cost you.

      • @NatakuNox
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        31 month ago

        This is America. Those eggs are going to the black market.

    • @Custard
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      41 month ago

      I wonder if this was before or after they wash the eggs. AFAIK they last longer and can be left unrefrigerated before they’re washed

    • @glitch1985
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      31 month ago

      You underestimate how many deviled eggs I can eat.

    • @[email protected]
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      1 month ago

      I had actually thought about this sort of scenario happening, and wondered the same about a week ago. My conclusion was freeze drying to make powdered eggs that can be shelf stable for years.

      Also might end up with a serious market for that as prices continue to climb with no end in sight.

      Last I bought powdered egg prior to this recent skyrocketing, it was about a dollar per egg in equivalence. I don’t know what it is now, but I’m sure that will go up too.

      (I use powdered egg for baking because I just don’t go through eggs enough to justify buying fresh. I actually save money by not having to throw away unused product)

  • @superfes
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    331 month ago

    That’ll help the price go down…

    • @[email protected]
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      1 month ago

      Depends: in the most likely case, where the thief is someone who’s trying to exploit the crisis to make a quick buck (just like Big Egg are), your sarcasm is accurate.

      In the unlikely, but not impossible, scenario of this being an act of Robin Hood style vigilantism, though, this could indeed make the price go down as a bunch of struggling people suddenly get free eggs…

    • @RagingRobot
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      31 month ago

      I can’t wait to buy black market eggs!

      • @macarthur_park
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        81 month ago

        Huh, near me a dozen eggs is $9.50, so close to $80k worth of eggs at retail prices.

          • WideEyedStupid
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            1 month ago

            If you file off the serial number, they can’t be traced!

            • @[email protected]
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              31 month ago

              You joke, but industrially prepared eggs nowadays have expiration date and lot number printed on them

              • WideEyedStupid
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                11 month ago

                They do? Huh. I thought they only did that on the boxes, not the eggs themselves. TIL.

  • @FollyDolly
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    101 month ago

    I need to put a lock on my chicken coup at this rate.

  • @Nastybutler
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    71 month ago

    Vegans gotta be laughing their asses off rn

      • @Nastybutler
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        11 month ago

        What about bread and pastries? Eggs are in a lot of things

  • @someguy3
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    1 month ago

    100k eggs about to go bad.

    You’d have to try to sell to stores and restaurant chains. I’m guestimating that’s 28 pallets of eggs. Googling says 8640 eggs per pallet, so 11.5 pallets.

  • @DarkFuture
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    41 month ago

    Lol.

    Get ready to see a lot more of this.