Was banned on a totally different instance and community despite never commenting in the community.

I suspect I was banned for questioning the narrative in this thread yesterday:

https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/be066e3c-b1ae-416c-bc71-248d3056c6ed.jpeg?thumbnail=1500&format=webp

I am a trans person and have no issue with trans people expressing who they are. The mods and admins of blahaj frequently use Gatekeeping as a false umbrella ban for any user they want to get rid of. This is also discussed in yesterday’s thread by some users.

The owners of that 196 space have proven they are unable to let sleeping dogs lie and are hellbent on tearing down all other instances in a tribal war, and have decided to start lurking in other spaces and preemptively banning people like reddit mods.

This is not fair moderation practices, it’s a petty tit for tat because abuse in their community was called out yesterday.

  • @SoftestSapphic
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    Jesus christ every time one of these threads flares up blahaj attacks another user, both with secret bans and then after the user exposes the abuse.

    Can blahaj keep their shit to themselves? Or are they this desperate for attention?

  • @[email protected]
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    -62 hours ago

    Just block Blahaj. I did. Found out the mod there encourages identity erasure via toxic gatecrashing, and I blocked the instance.

    I learned years ago that engaging with people of that mindset is bad for my mental health, and I feel so much happier not seeing that kind of thing.

    There’s a 196 that’s not on Blahaj. And it’s not inactive. As for queer communities, if you really need one and that doesn’t exist outside of Blahaj, maybe make one.

    • Like the wind...
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      -42 hours ago

      Bruh how much effort is running your own instance? I hoard so many domain names, might as well make an actual queer friendly instance.

  • @[email protected]
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    85 hours ago

    YDI, go apologize if you actually care, otherwise clearly that space wasn’t for you anyway. The admin there has been very clear that such dialogue is not permitted in the space she owns and that she maintains the right to do preemptive bans. You can disagree with the rules but you can’t be butthurt that you broke them and got whacked for it.

    • @PugJesus
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      -84 hours ago

      The admin there has been very clear that such dialogue is not permitted in the space she owns and that she maintains the right to do preemptive bans.

      Ah yes, as we are on the comm “MyHouseMyRules”

  • @[email protected]
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    WTF?! YDI. You should know better than to act like that in a trans space. I myself am Nonbinary and a therian and have had to deal with people exactly like you telling me I’m crazy for it. The thing is I have species dysphoria and it’s not something I can control, so calling me crazy for it is as bad as someone saying you’re crazy for you having gender dysphoria. Go fuck yourself!

    • @PugJesus
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      -64 hours ago

      The thing is I have species dysphoria

  • Draconic NEO
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    banned for gatekeeping

    YDI, this that you are/were doing. It doesn’t matter if you are a trans woman. Gatekeeping people’s identities is still gatekeeping. Blahaj bans transmedicalists so you should know better than to try and say it’s okay because you’re a trans woman. In addition the whole "Just asking questions rhetoric isn’t accepted either because it’s what those “polite transphobes” you see on BBC use and honestly they should be banned. Not banning them is to fall for their bullshit and allow them to continue their invalidating and abusive arguments.

    @[email protected] This seems like a rehash of the other locked topics. Lots of bellyaching, very little merit in them.

    • Blaze (he/him)
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      127 hours ago

      This seems like a rehash of the other locked topics

      This one seems pretty settled by now compared to yesterday.

      • Draconic NEO
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        I don’t imagine it will stay that way for long, these threads almost always become a breeding ground for people who were banned for gatekeeping or transphobia to bellyache and whine about blahaj for not allowing blatant or subtle gatekeeping.

        Edit: Called it, thread is filled with whiny transphobes and gatekeepers bellyaching about being banned from a privately run Lemmy server for their refusal to follow the rules and respect others.

    • @LittleRatInALittleHatOP
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      Trans people are going to be put in camps and you idiots care more about if trolls have their pronouns respected.

      Bulling me until I submit to your definitons of my sexuality is ironically gatekeeping.

      What a inclusive community for sensible people. FFS

      • Draconic NEO
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        97 hours ago

        No, your rigid definitions and trying to decide which trans or queer people are valid is gatekeeping and as @[email protected] said, your eagerness to capitulate to fascists is harmful. Why would anyone want to welcome you with open arms to their communities when you are doing exactly the same thing that transphobes do, invalidating people’s identities.

        • @LittleRatInALittleHatOP
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          -56 hours ago

          Don’t you dare fucking lump me in with fascists.

          My identity has been invalidated in favor of people who use gender to troll people who experience actual oppression.

          I never thought that i would agree more with reddit moderation policies considering this space was supposed to be better. But kicking trans people out of trans spaces because they don’t think dogs and dragons are people is something even they know is ridiculous. I guess that’s just something that comes from older spaces where they have worked through their growing pains.

          • Draconic NEO
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            76 hours ago

            Don’t you dare fucking lump me in with fascists.

            Then quite acting like one, and quit trying to act like being trans somehow grants you immunity from being one, because there are indeed trans people who are fascists and who side with fascists and in this thread you’ve been acting like one. Gatekeeping people’s identities and claiming we should because you believe some identities are harmful or causing transphobia. If you don’t see how that’s harmful there’s nothing more to say here, but your continued behavior in this thread reinforces my opinion that you absolutely deserve it.

            • @LittleRatInALittleHatOP
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              I don’t want to be equated with people who pretend to be animals and mythical creatures. It’s an insult to actual gender identities that exist in the real world off of the internet.

              I thought blahaj was supposed to be the inclusive space for lgbtq people who want to vent about real oppression in reality, not have to justify totally normal and grounded views. I now see you people are crazy and maybe i should block the instance or go to a different reddit alternative.

              Do you realize that comparing trans people to these “hair color” gender identities only invaludates actual trans people?

              Like look at this from the perspective of a real person in the real world. People can change genders, but they can’t become dogs or dragons. I’m sorry you feel otherwise but that’s how it is.

              • Draconic NEO
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                Do you realize that transmedicalists and the people claiming to be the “good trans people” are literally one step above fascists. You’re sitting here trying to argue transphobic and gatekeeping talking points as if it’s valid or okay. The thing that is an insult to trans people are people like you who feel they have the right to gatekeep others and their gender identities, all under the guise of capitulating to the fascists who want them gone.

                Oh and yeah I did compare you to a transmedicalist. your gatekeeping is very much the same flavor as transmeds. Trying to gatekeep identities “for the good of trans people” blahaj doesn’t support that or people who partake in it, because it is a toxic and cruel belief, and the people who perpetrate it are toxic and cruel people. You’re proving that by your continued desire to prove yourself as one of the “good trans people” while gatekeeping and invalidating xenogenders and neopronouns openly.

                • @LittleRatInALittleHatOP
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                  You calling trans people fascists is not making the case for inclusivity.

                  Since you say Blahaj doesn’t support trans people, is there a space on this site that does support us?

  • @PugJesus
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    Apparently, transmedicalism now is “Not believing human beings are opossums” according to the Blahaj admins.

    Congratulations, Blahaj, Defender of Trans Folk! You managed to bully a trans Fediverse user into leaving! That’ll show them to be trans and have opinions that aren’t your’s!

    • Blaze (he/him)
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      53 hours ago

      Congratulations, Blahaj, Defender of Trans Folk! You managed to bully a trans Fediverse user into leaving! That’ll show them to be trans and have opinions that aren’t yours!

      God, I can’t believe I violated Blahaj’s safe space.

      When was the last time I posted on Blahaj, again?

      Shouldn’t talking about them in such terms considered posting on their communities?

      • @PugJesus
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        -53 hours ago

        Shouldn’t talking about them in such terms considered posting on their communities?

        … no?

        What kind of insane fucking logic is that?

  • @[email protected]
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    239 hours ago

    despite never commenting in the community

    I suspect you got instance banned and that got you banned from the community, but you’re going to have to check the modlog yourself.

    • @LittleRatInALittleHatOP
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      Crap I forgot that comment, but I think I also commented in another trans community on blahaj so idk if it was a whole instance ban.

      I couldn’t see anything that said the whole instance, just for that specific space.

      I wish we got messages or something like I did on reddit when this happened instead of waking up one moring to figure out you’ve been effectively shadowbanned with no real explanation.

  • Mossy Feathers (She/They)
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    If this isn’t gatekeeping, then what is it? Sparkling “just asking questions”? This is what gatekeeping is, sweetheart. It’s a form of bigotry in which you tell someone, either directly or through implied statements, that their identity isn’t valid. No wonder you got banned from a queer safe space. It doesn’t matter how trans or gay you are, perpetuating the cycle of abuse will get you banned from queer safe spaces.

    If you’re unable to fathom the possibility that someone could have an identity that doesn’t make sense to you, grow up. There are a lot of things that people do which seem silly in life but are an integral part of who they are. Grow the fuck up.

    Edit as a warning to cis allies for this comment chain: I was a bit sloppy with my aim, sorry if you caught a stray bullet.

    • @LittleRatInALittleHatOP
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      I am a trans woman.

      I have no issue with Neopronouns, they/them/it, even the humans who identify as like Xi/Xit I’m fine with even though it’s a bit weird imo.

      But non human gender identities is where I draw the line

      I’m sorry, but I don’t like transgender people being looped in with people who want to be animals, mythical creatures, and aliens. It comes off as disingenuous when these people try to insert themselves into trans spaces to get validation while trans people IRL are being put in camps.

      Ironically the admins have decided what the definitons of transgender are, and gatekeep that definiton.

      If you think bullying trans people into these weird guilt games is productive then maybe you should grow up, sweetheart.

      • Mossy Feathers (She/They)
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        I’m trans too, so it doesn’t matter how many times you say you’re trans sweetheart. That’s not gonna work. Furthermore, unlike you, I’ve decided not to let the cis people define who I am. If it wasn’t the otherkin and therians then it’d be someone else they’d be demanding we remove. I remember when people said enbies weren’t valid. So some people decided to try to exclude enbies from the definition of being trans and you know what happened? The leopards turned around and ate their faces once they were done feeding on the enbies.

        Why do you care what cis people think? That’s the only reason why you’d care. That’s literally the only reason why you’d give a shit is if you think being trans is some kinda fucked up badge of pride or if you’re trying to tame transness for the poor, sensitive cis people. Lemme tell you, the leopard will never cease to be hungry sweetheart. Grow up and quit caring about what the cis bigots think. Stop helping them to be bigots. They’ll come for us sooner or later, doesn’t matter how many people you throw under the bus.

        And yes, I’m being condescending because you’re acting like a child, trying to tell everyone how to play the game because a bunch of bullies once told you how you were supposed to play it. Do you know what those bullies are called? Fascists. Do you know what we do with fascists? I’ll give you a hint, we don’t sit down and drink tea with them. Fascists are not worth the air they breath. Stop feeding them. Until you do, you are no better than they are.

        • @LittleRatInALittleHatOP
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          So what is the healthy conclusion that is reached by conflating trans human beings with people who want to be dogs and aliens? Do you understand in the real world somebody hears that and assumes everyone involved is crazy?

          I remember this same drama happening on reddit, and after the terfs failed to invalidate enby people the terfs started to become dogs and attack helicopters to make a mockery of our non cis genders.

          • Mossy Feathers (She/They)
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            If my parents and grandparents can understand it or at least learn to accept it, so can your average person. We’re being true to ourselves. We’re living our lives the way we see fit. We are alive, at least for now, and I will stand my ground because I’m not a pussy-ass bitch who’d sell out my friends and family to make a bigot happy.

            If you want to hurt yourself to make the cis people happy, then go knock yourself out, I suppose. However I’d appreciate it if you’d do it a nice, safe distance away from my family, friends and I; which means queer safe spaces don’t seem like your speed.

            Me? I’ll be encouraging my friends and family to thrive and be the people they’ve always wanted to be.

            I’m sorry you’ve never had anyone to give you that strength.

            • @LittleRatInALittleHatOP
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              Ok, you aren’t using Neopronouns so that really isn’t relevant. Your pronouns say she/they

              Would your grandparents respond positively to you trying to convince them you are a dog?

              • Mossy Feathers (She/They)
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                I wore my opossum tail during family Christmas. No one cared. I wore my collar. No one cared. I wore my furry stuff and carried my plushies around and despite being 30yrs old, you know, the age well beyond the point where you’re supposed to have grown out of that stuff, no one cared. This was in Texas.

                You know why I wore my opossum tail and collar? Because at the end of the day I feel like I have an opossum’s soul and it honestly feels really weird not to wear them. I’m fucking skrunkly and constantly worried about everything. Did I make a big deal out of it though? No. I just lived my life the way I wanted to and no one had a problem with it. The reason I don’t use neopronouns has nothing to do with their validity, I simply find them awkward. However I will not tell someone they are invalid or they shouldn’t use them themselves.

                Oh, and before you try to tell me I’m invalid, I’m AMAB. I’m trans in more than one way.

                • @PugJesus
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                  -34 hours ago

                  You know why I wore my opossum tail and collar? Because at the end of the day I feel like I have an opossum’s soul and it honestly feels really weird not to wear them.

                  Jesus fucking Christ.

  • Blaze (he/him)
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    159 hours ago

    I am going to ask here because I couldn’t do it in the other one before it was locked.

    Hypothetical scenario

    • An unmoderated instance allows people to make hate speech comments
    • That instance also has interesting communities, so defederation is not possible
    • An admin sees this and pre-emptively bans the people making hate speech comments

    Would you be okay with way of moderating? I’m asking because it seems like the “despite never commenting in the community” argument gets brought up a lot, but is that really that good of an argument?

    • @[email protected]
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      75 hours ago

      Good illustrative post.

      In the end, and I am sure you are aware, you pose the wrong question. “Would you be okay with that way of moderating” isn’t the question because it ignores the dynamics of federation. Ada owns the server. If you’re not okay with the moderation, you move servers, and a huge community like 196 has already shown it will move mountains to stay on LBZ.

      So, the question OP should ask is “do I care enough about this space to apologize or attempt to make ammends?”

      • sunzu2
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        -53 hours ago

        196 has already shown it will move mountains to stay on LBZ.

        Is this even true

      • @PugJesus
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        -34 hours ago

        Ada owns the server.

        Which means everything she does is correct. Of course.

        • @[email protected]
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          71 hour ago

          Nope! Bad faith as always. My reasoning for Ada being correct is found throughout a huge number of other comments and statements I have made about her, and you found the one that ✨you’re right,✨ doesn’t directly evidence Ada being in the right and instead was written about OP and their experience. :)

          Would you like a pat on the head or a gold star? Since you want to treat me like I am a child?

          • Eugene V. Debs' Ghost
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            Bad faish is just PJ’s method of breathing at this point.

            If .world was doing this to Tankies they’d be celebrating how they need to protect their favorite instance.

    • @LittleRatInALittleHatOP
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      -179 hours ago

      Careful with your wording, the people being banned aren’t gatekeeping, that’s just the bullshit excuse used and then if it’s ever refuted, well then the record says they’re a bigot and who cares what they think?

      Considering every different space has different rules, it is unfair to force the loosely interpreted rules of one space on a totally different space.

        • @LittleRatInALittleHatOP
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          You not wanting to read does not change me answering your question.

          Considering every different space has different rules, it is unfair to force the loosely interpreted rules of one space on a totally different space.

          If you want the rules of another instance changed you can ask the owners of that instance.

          Lurking/banning users mods don’t like for bullshit reasons is objectively bad policy and shows PTB

          Autobans are reddit mod behavior.

          • Mossy Feathers (She/They)
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            169 hours ago

            I was curious why you’re being so evasive.

            This is called gatekeeping people’s identities. That is what you’re doing. You are engaging in bigotry so yeah, of course you’re going to get banned from a queer safe space. It doesn’t matter how trans or gay you might be, if you’re practicing bigotry then you’re part of the problem. You’re part of the reason these safe spaces exist to begin with.

            If you can’t deal with the idea that someone might have an identity that you can’t understand, then you need to grow up.

            Stop perpetuating the cycle of abuse.

            The fact that someone who’s supposedly trans isn’t able to understand that they are continuing the exact cycle of abuse that cis people have been pushing onto trans people is very sad. How lucky you must be to have never been doubted or told that your identity is fictional.

            • @LittleRatInALittleHatOP
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              I am a trans woman.

              I have no issue with Neopronouns, they/them/it, even the humans who identify as like Xi/Xit I’m fine with even though it’s a bit weird imo.

              But non human gender identities is where I draw the line

              I’m sorry, but I don’t like transgender people being looped in with people who want to be animals, mythical creatures, and aliens. It comes off as disingenuous when these people try to insert themselves into trans spaces to get validation while trans people IRL are being put in camps.

              Ironically the admins have decided what the definitons of transgender are, and gatekeep that definiton.

              If you think bullying trans people into these weird guilt games is productive then maybe you should grow up.

              I noticed you took out the condescending “sweetheart” this time so i will too.

          • Blaze (he/him)
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            179 hours ago

            So if someone writes racist comments on an unmoderated community, they shouldn’t be banned from another instance until they write racist comments on that instance as well?

            • @LittleRatInALittleHatOP
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              -148 hours ago

              So when does blahaj start using automoderator to ban everyone who’s posted to a specific instance?

              Because that’s where these autoban policies lead to.

              • Blaze (he/him)
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                128 hours ago

                I post on the instance and community we’re currently in as much as you do. A lot of people do. None of them have been automatically banned.

                • Eugene V. Debs' Ghost
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                  55 hours ago

                  It’s almost like people are making a boogey man out of internet moderators trying to have a safe space for people being affected by people like Rat in a Hat and PugJesus, and they they complain that they are the victims of their Freeze Peach being violated.

  • Like the wind...
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    04 hours ago

    I’m about to blacklist that g word at this point. The blahaj admin singlehandedly made that word feel like spiders under my skin

  • southsamurai
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    58 hours ago

    Tbh, this one is difficult to make a good PTB response about.

    The closest I can get is it might be YDI, because your user history does show a proclivity to the kind of arguments that blahaj regularly uses as the criteria.

    But, it could be PTB instead, since your user history is also free of actual gatekeeping comments, on this account.

    But you do mention that this account is one of at least two, with the intent of keeping another account specifically for blahaj that you want to protect. If that’s the case, we have no way of knowing what you’ve said where that could be a legit violation.

    Now, the screen shots provided don’t show you actually violating the rules, so, it’s a qualified PTB where there’s a possibility that you did and I just can’t see it. If that’s the case, I’d reserve the ability to change my mind.

    I will say though, so far everyone that’s posted about this has ended up having violated that rule and it just wasn’t visible immediately. It’s a controversial rule for sure, and preemptive bans even moreso.

    Now with that out of the way, you did ask some questions about neopronouns that I never saw get answered. I will not dive into that on this thread because that’s not what this community is for.

    However, having had some recent exploration about neopronouns, xenopronouns and related issues, if you shoot me a DM or make a post in a community that is for asking questions about difficult subjects, I’ll gladly share what I’ve found regarding what those things actually mean, and would likely be willing to briefly and civilly discuss my opinion on the matter. But I don’t let internet arguments go very far, so remember that I won’t be debating the issue, just explaining what I’ve learned and my opinion, so if it gets past the point where it’s two folks having a chill conversation, I’m out. And, to repeat, I won’t do that here, this isn’t the community for that

  • @[email protected]
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    the responses + voting in this thread suggest that lemmy is full of extremely headfucked furries who think they are actually animals. the internet can be pretty bad for you

    • @PugJesus
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      -64 hours ago

      Blahaj users like to support one another. Tumblr swarm etc etc

    • sunzu2
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      -73 hours ago

      This is the answer… That’s how you deal with it.

      Thank god online Gestapo can’t put you in the camp like they would on reddit

      Fedi4lyf

    • Mossy Feathers (She/They)
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      65 hours ago

      They’re gatekeeping what it means to be trans. It’s so painfully obvious, c’mon dude. It actually makes me really sad to see you saying this.

      • Eugene V. Debs' Ghost
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        54 hours ago

        He’s also a gatekeeper, check the modlog of his account. That’s why he hates Blahaj. That’s why anyone hates Blahaj.

        • @SoftestSapphic
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          the only reason anyone hates blahaj is because they are a bigot gatekeeper!!!

          Maybe if everyone is banned for the same rule the admins are abusing the rule

          This has been ongoing since December, admins abused their bans to crush dissent and use Gatekeeping as the excuse that their justice addicted users dogpile on.

          All dissent is banned from blahaj

        • Mossy Feathers (She/They)
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          74 hours ago

          I’m gonna have to go through his profile and see if that’s true at some point. If so, that’s very disappointing. I woulda thought that a furry, of all people, would understand why gatekeeping is a bad thing.

    • Eugene V. Debs' Ghost
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      34 hours ago

      Check the modlog and y’all will see why Kolanaki hates Blahaj. Here’s a hint, same shit as OP and PJ.

    • @LittleRatInALittleHatOP
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      It really feels like it.

      I joined the Fediverse recently and looked for the trans community, what I found was tribalistic infighting, tone policing, and ironically gatekeeping. Literally worse moderation and vibes than the lgbtq subreddits I was on.

      Is there another reddit like space people from reddit can move to that isn’t the Fediverse?

        • @LittleRatInALittleHatOP
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          7 hours ago

          Aren’t those communities for tankies?

          I was already banned from .ml for referring to Xi as a dictator. So idk if I would fit in there.