DS9 s3e26 “The Adversary”
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Hey, that reminds me of my job!
Cardassian cable management is the strongest evidence of their non superiority.
cracks knuckles
Alright, time to do a scream test
pulls a random cable
“Wait a minute, none of the punchdowns match the listed switch ports.”
Oh dear… 🔪
Building patch panels are 1-24. New juniper switches are 0-23 🫠
So I assigned 0 to management and put it on 24 🤷🏻
Pffft. * Laughs in telecom*
Tech #1 - Do you see the wire I’m wiggling?
Tech #2 - The blue one?
Tech #1 - Yes try tugging on it
Tech #2 - Ok…anything?
Tech #1 - Nope try the other blue one
This goes on until they found the right blue wire…for another 20min
Let’s play a more deadly game of Pick-up 52, apparently.
Went looking for an isolinear chip gif, but found this along the way:
“It’s the 24th goddamned century, and we still haven’t mastered basic cable management.”
And still don’t have enough bandwidth to multiplex all the signals.
Or are they proprietary cables?
“Damn it Jim! I’m a programmer, not a Starfleet Academy trained engineer!”
Hmm. Why organize with those fiberoptic wires at all when all programming is done by organizing isolinear chips in a grid?
(Also, as easily as those chips pop out, every time the inertial dampeners fail just enough for the crew to feel hull damage but not enough to turn them to paste, they would all fall out and require Data to reorganize them.)
I’m convinced the chips do nothing, and the entire thing was dreamed up by the daystrom institute as a way to keep hyperactive engineers busy without fucking anything up, while the computer actually just solves everything.
Data is the only character we see with a dedicated computer in his quarters, and I bet that’s for a very good reason.
Porn?
Maybe it’s all wireless and the cable horror is just for messing with intruders.
Meanwhile cable management in Star Wars:
**cking Cardassian, they don’t know how to cables manage.
Quantuum Bong
