Sen. Mitch McConnell (R-Ky.) vowed Wednesday to keep his job as Senate Republican leader at least through 2024 and to finish his seventh Senate term, which runs through 2026, despite recent health problems.

“I have no announcements to make on that subject,” McConnell, who is 81, told reporters when asked about calls from fellow conservatives to step down as Senate Republican leader.

“I’m going to finish my term as leader and I’m going to finish my Senate term,” McConnell declared.

  • teft
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    671 year ago

    Until someone finds his phylactery there’s nothing that can be done. Liches gonna lich.

    • @_bug0ut
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      251 year ago

      I heard its just a regular Ball mason jar and they keep it in the basement at the Heritage Foundation… like right by the display case with Ted Cruz’s spine and across from the cheap plastic dorm room trashcan from Target that houses McCarthy’s single brain cell.

      • @Bdtrngl
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        101 year ago

        I know this is a rumor because Ted Cruz doesn’t have a spine.

        • @_bug0ut
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          41 year ago

          Ah, yeah, I forgot to mention: the display case is empty.

    • theodewere
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      61 year ago

      this what you get when you allow the Lich to DM… i don’t know who decided that was a good idea, you know… must have been some bargain or other…

  • @Clent
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    591 year ago

    Weekend at Bernie’s…another remake no one asked for.

      • @LrdThndr
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        21 year ago

        “Weekend at Bernie’s” was an 80’s movie about a businessman that is murdered by the mob, but two of his employees stumble upon the body and, believing they accidentally killed him, have to puppet his corpse to try to convince people he’s still alive until they can escape. It’s a comedy, despite how dark it sounds.

      • @Clent
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        01 year ago

        Different Bernie. This is a movie reference.

  • @smitty
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    481 year ago

    “I’m going to finish my term as leader and…"

    { 47 seconds of silence }

    "I’m going to finish my Senate term,”

    • @Mog_fanatic
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      111 year ago

      SPEAK SLOWLY AND CLEARLY FOR THE SENATOR PLEASE.

  • @[email protected]
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    1 year ago

    Mitch McConnell has personally done more harm to the people of the US than anyone since Reagan. He is one of the greatest monsters in modern American history, directly responsible for immeasurable human suffering and he does not deserve to live.

    The next one needs to kill him, and I hope it happens on camera for all of us to watch, because it’s the closest tbong to justice he will ever face.

    • @reagansrottencorpse
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      161 year ago

      I’d love to watch the life slowly leave his eyes as he shits himself on national television.

      • Alien Nathan Edward
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        21 year ago

        I, for one, hope hell is real. Eternal torment will turn out to be a fair deal when offset by the sheer delight of watching people like McConnell plead with God as the gates shut behind them. “But…but I hurt all the people you told me to hurt…”

      • @Rakonat
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        11 year ago

        Censorship is big for Moscow, so Moscow Mitch is still relevant. His GRU handlers wouldn’t let him say anything!

    • @DJKayDawg
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      -31 year ago

      I would rather see a peaceful transition of power. I don’t see how revenge helps anyone here.

      • @LrdThndr
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        1 year ago

        Not the next senator, the next mine-stroke. Dying of a stroke on national tv is far better than this quivering lump of chelonian garbage deserves.

  • @Tylerdurdon
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    401 year ago

    Harry may have gotten 2 horcruxes so far, but he surely won’t find the rest.

  • @eran_morad
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    381 year ago

    we’re gonna watch him die at a press conference.

  • @TokenBoomer
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    211 year ago

    Slow and steady wins the race- the Tortoise

    • @clearedtoland
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      51 year ago

      I will forever hear Jon Stewart’s impression when I read McConnell quotes.

  • @TheJims
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    191 year ago

    Once the lizard people mothership arrives with his new host body from the home world.

  • @rDrDr
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    131 year ago

    We need to retake the Senate for the blue team in 2024 so that we can have a real leader, like Diane Feinstein.

    • @NightAuthor
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      31 year ago

      I don’t know what exact joke you’re trying to make, but it really is well past time both of them retire.

        • @NightAuthor
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          -31 year ago

          Well, it could be that joke. Or it could be a sarcastic ass “y’all talking shit about our guy, but look at ur people”. Basically the same joke I guess, but more pointed.

  • @eddanja
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    121 year ago

    Lich McConnell went back and reviewed the Necronomicon and realized that these episodes don’t actually mean anything and the necromancy spell he cast 800 years ago should give him a few more terms.

  • @Delusional
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    121 year ago

    Of course. When has he ever made a decision that benefits others than himself? Never.

    • @ManosTheHandsOfFate
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      71 year ago

      I don’t know what’s going through these ancient politicians’ heads but don’t they reach a point where they’ve accomplished everything in life they can and they just want to relax? Being an 80+ year old senator and dying in office sounds horrible to me.

      • @abigscaryhobo
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        91 year ago

        It’s not about being accomplished for most of them anymore. It’s about not letting go of their power. They won’t admit to themselves that they’re old or the world has changed. They grip desperately to their seat and their power because they “can still do it”, and they “know what’s best”.

        People who have had a senile friend or family member have seen similar stuff plenty of times. Older adults who can’t even close their hands all the way or remember that they dont have shoes on will argue and fight, sometimes violently, that they can still do something. For example, still cook with an open flame despite catching their house on fire three separate times. Or that they can still drive despite not seeing past their fingertips and not knowing what city they’re in.

        There is a thing called aging gracefully that involves accepting the difficulties of getting older and passing the torch, and clearly a large number of politicians are having a serious problem with it.

  • @[email protected]
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    1 year ago

    Sen. Mitch McConnell 's future ghost (RIP-Ky.) vowed Wednesday to keep his its job as Senate Republican leader…

    ftfy

  • @Sanctus
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    81 year ago

    Be honest with yourself, you have like 4-6 years at most.

    • stopthatgirl7
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      101 year ago

      I don’t even think he’s got that long.

      There’s only a one year difference in these pictures.

      • @xantoxis
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        141 year ago

        You have to drink a lot of baby blood to maintain the skin suit’s integrity, and it’s hard to sneak up on a baby when you keep having strokes

      • Endorkend
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        11 year ago

        That’s what I noticed in the videos where he’s having his episodes, he’s extra skinny and just looks extra like shit.

    • @Dkarma
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      31 year ago

      Yeah but that’s drinking 3-4 babies per day. Idk how he can keep up with supply tbh…

      • @Sanctus
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        21 year ago

        I’m sure they’re fed to him intravenously.

    • @Hazdaz
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      11 year ago

      You are being super generous, I think.

      I say he makes it to 2024, but doesn’t see 2026.

  • Alien Nathan Edward
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    71 year ago

    My brain doesn’t work and I’m in charge of a lot of stuff

    —a guy from a place where things are Fine