There’s also the “Oh yeah, same situation” crowd. People who feel the same way, who agree about the state of the world, and also struggle to get by.

Which in itself, isn’t a bad way to respond - it’s honest, after all. However, it makes the idea of “reaching out for help” worse than pointless - not only won’t I get any help, but I’ll get more validation that I was right to feel hopeless in the first place.

If you’re struggling with depression, you need to see a doctor. To go with the metaphor in the meme, the average person isn’t trained to save a drowning person, who can also end up drowning anyone who tries to save them. Lifeguards are trained to save drowning people.

My sister’s husband was one of the most active people I knew: jogging, cycling, basketball, long nature walks… It didn’t help him with his depression, though. Or at least not enough.

That actually sounds kinda decent response. The person giving advice is just trying their best, we aren’t all therapist

I’m fully aware of the irony of downplaying how complicated emotions can be ITT, but after all my years depressed or whatever mixture of things I am, I think the simpler concepts have done me the most good overall really.

I came across these 5 words a couple years ago, and it struck me as the exact advice I needed for a long time.

Don’t believe everything you think.

Try some exercise. For a brief time, the sadness is overshadowed by physical pain and a burdensome sense of weakness, inferiority and futility.

It’s good to change things up once in a while!

Last time i really opened up, i was one upped and then fired a couple months later because opening up made people (my boss who one upped me) uncomfortable.

There also “you won’t know if you don’t talk about it at all”, take a risk and maybe it will help.

What could go wrong?

Oh look, it’s the Swedish healthcare system.

I’m glad you’re getting more water now.

At a bare minimum i always appreciate an attempt to help, even if their ideas aren’t actually helpful

The sad truth in this world is that, apart from your close friends, your partners and your parents (if you’re lucky), nobody cares too much about you in general. This can be devastating, but it can also be liberating.

What else could I do for you, besides saying, “that sucks, friend”? Asking seriously.

• I can offer you advice based on my own experience, that may or may not work for you.
• I can refer you to talk to someone who has a professional degree in studying feelings, who may be able to help you with better advice than me or prescribe drugs.
• I can sit, nod, pat you on the back through words.

If it is someone I know in person, I’d try to send them care package based on what I would think they liked.

Depression is one of the hardest things I’ve ever talked to people about. People that don’t get depressed don’t get it. People that are they themselves depressed can enable bad behavior. People that don’t believe in depression (thanks dad) think that you are over reacting. And people that want to help are usually the ones that don’t really get it either and don’t know how to help.

Of course there is a bias towards negative experiences as when you are depressed those are the ones that stick out the most. But it still seems like bringing it up to people is such a mixed bag that most people end up internalizing it which only exacerbates it and continues the cycle of hiding emotions (I’m speaking from a male perspective if it wasn’t obvious).

And as someone that has been horribly depressed at various parts of my life I honestly can’t even give any good advice since those parts of my life are such a blur. All I know is that one day I was just okay without even realizing it. Sure I still get depressed from time to time, but I think the part that has changed most about me is my perspective. These days instead of focusing on the feelings of depression I focus on what is causing the depression. Sometimes there is no cause and I just have to deal with it, but most of the time I can figure out what is currently doing it and try and mitigate the issue if I can. And if I can’t, I’ll try and distract myself when I have free time instead of sitting inside my head.

Everybody’s journey is different and I recommend taking what I say with a grain of salt. I was able to face my demons by myself but I know I’m more of am exception rather than the rule. If you think you need help, you probably do. And I recommend help from a professional or someone close to you that has had similar life experience in the past. Talking about it may not seem like it helps sometimes but it really does make small dents over time. And speaking about it out loud can really help you work through something and put it into words instead of generic thoughts floating in your head. It’s why a lot of artists and musicians poor their emotions into their work. It’s easier to work through things in the real world than it is with the abstraction of ideas that is your mind.

And believe it or not, the advice of “drink water and do yoga” is less about the actual activities and more about letting your mind and body do something else besides be depressed. Pick a different activity that you actually enjoy and just see where it goes. The worst that can happen is that you are still depressed but have a new hobby. And, let’s be real, none of us drink enough water.

But have you?