• @[email protected]
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    8923 days ago

    Galadriel and Celeborn were married in the First Age and the story takes place at the end of the Third, so they were married for at least six and a half thousand years. During that time, they had one child. How often do you think they had sex?

      • rustydomino
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        422 days ago

        I does my heart good to see more Silmarillion memes leak into lotrmemes.

      • @[email protected]
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        4623 days ago

        No, I blame Tolkien and his literally making elves only bang for the purpose of procreation because he’s a repressed Catholic weirdo sometimes.

        Jokes on him, modern society has agreed elves are hos.

        • @[email protected]
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          2823 days ago

          It would be prudent for a sentient species with such long lifespans to practice planned procreation rather than multiplying exponentially like a culture on a petri dish.

          • @herrvogel
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            23 days ago

            There’s the Elven Rope that’s light as a feather and strong as steel. No reason there could not have been the Elven Condom that’s thin and impermeable.

            • @MutilationWave
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              222 days ago

              I’m sure they had them, but they’re incompatible. Can’t make Elven Ropes while wearing an Elven Condom.

        • @[email protected]
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          423 days ago

          Some would say 40k maybe went a little too far in the opposite direction with dark elves.

      • @[email protected]
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        26
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        23 days ago

        AkShUaLlY…. It’s pronounced “Kel-a-born”….but I still applaud your humor!

        Most, if not all c’s are pronounced as hard K’s in Elvish (Elven?) languages.

        It does get a little weird with places like Cirith Ungol, but there are, allegedly, older maps where it’s spelled Kirith.

    • JaggedRobotPubes
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      2323 days ago

      Successfully millions of times, unsuccessfully once.

    • @RizzRustbolt
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      722 days ago

      Once.

      But elf sex is crazy weird. Like, they were still doing it while Frodo and the Fellowship were there.

    • @Snowclone
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      622 days ago

      Dude it’s elves who knows. She also slowes the passage of time by like MONTHS for a day, on top of being immortal it’s pretty obnoxious. Maybe they only plow once a 1000 years, or maybe it’s every day and they are only fertile once in thousands of years.