Are people actually happy that I tried? Sometimes I wonder if they genuinely appreciate being admired, or if it’s damage control to make the rejection a bit sweeter to swallow
At one point in life, you just don’t care. When I was younger, I always wondered what people thought of what I said, what I did, didn’t say or didn’t do. I got tired of trying to figure out what others were thinking.
Now I just do my best, treat people with kindness and respect and if they react negatively for whatever reason, I ignore it and move on. I also learn to stand up for myself and if someone treats me negatively or unkindly, then I defend myself and stand up for myself or others if I have to.
I’ve grown to appreciate the old saying: ‘How people think of me is none of my business’
The benefit is that every once in a while (not every time), you get to meet some really honestly genuine kind and good hearted people.
Plus you can always laugh about it afterwards (as long as it’s not a creepy/intrusive/tasteless attempt at flirting), and that can serve just as well!
I fully accepted my complete lack of game, so I purposefully turn flirting into a playful parody with extra-campy Smooth™ lathered all over that puppy, and the reactions so far have been really positive!
I still can’t tell when someone else is flirting with me, though, so I just joke about that, too! I make it clear that my love language isn’t Sexy Talk in general, so I just ask “are you flirting with me right now?” at inappropriate times, which nets me at least a frustrated chuckle.
As a great man once said: “you laughed, I’m off the hook!”
I’m happily married for a very long time now and what I’ve noticed is that just being kind, attentive and listening is sometimes more than enough for some people to think that you are interested or flirting. I would never cheat but I’ve stepped into situations like this by accident more often than I care to admit.
Oh, yepyep, honest and open communication is vital in everything! And I agree that “to each their own,” we all have our own love languages and respond in our own unique ways to everything!
I think your point is even reinforced by contemporary circumstances, as a whole damned lot of us would almost kill for a bit of kindness and soft attention…
More often than not, it doesn’t matter what key you use. Most people are just happy and even surprised that you tried.
Are people actually happy that I tried? Sometimes I wonder if they genuinely appreciate being admired, or if it’s damage control to make the rejection a bit sweeter to swallow
At one point in life, you just don’t care. When I was younger, I always wondered what people thought of what I said, what I did, didn’t say or didn’t do. I got tired of trying to figure out what others were thinking.
Now I just do my best, treat people with kindness and respect and if they react negatively for whatever reason, I ignore it and move on. I also learn to stand up for myself and if someone treats me negatively or unkindly, then I defend myself and stand up for myself or others if I have to.
I’ve grown to appreciate the old saying: ‘How people think of me is none of my business’
The benefit is that every once in a while (not every time), you get to meet some really honestly genuine kind and good hearted people.
Even the fact that they try to do some damage control means they care in a way, otherwise they wouldn’t be bothered by the idea of upsetting you.
Plus you can always laugh about it afterwards (as long as it’s not a creepy/intrusive/tasteless attempt at flirting), and that can serve just as well!
I fully accepted my complete lack of game, so I purposefully turn flirting into a playful parody with extra-campy Smooth™ lathered all over that puppy, and the reactions so far have been really positive!
I still can’t tell when someone else is flirting with me, though, so I just joke about that, too! I make it clear that my love language isn’t Sexy Talk in general, so I just ask “are you flirting with me right now?” at inappropriate times, which nets me at least a frustrated chuckle.
As a great man once said: “you laughed, I’m off the hook!”
I’m happily married for a very long time now and what I’ve noticed is that just being kind, attentive and listening is sometimes more than enough for some people to think that you are interested or flirting. I would never cheat but I’ve stepped into situations like this by accident more often than I care to admit.
Oh, yepyep, honest and open communication is vital in everything! And I agree that “to each their own,” we all have our own love languages and respond in our own unique ways to everything!
I think your point is even reinforced by contemporary circumstances, as a whole damned lot of us would almost kill for a bit of kindness and soft attention…