If not, then what about rarely instead of never?

  • @SpaceNoodle
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    401 year ago

    I’d rather fart and be happy than smell nice in misery.

    • @ickplant
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      81 year ago

      If you really wanted the best of both worlds, you could get those underwear inserts that hide the smell.

        • @ickplant
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          71 year ago

          They even have a blanket for similar purposes (fart concealment) and it’s called “the marriage blanket.” Cause farts ruin your marriage, allegedly. Haven’t ruined mine, but what do I know.

      • @HeyThisIsntTheYMCA
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        51 year ago

        There’s this mineral you can eat called bismuth subgallate that works as an internal deodorant. It’s sold under the brand name devrom. Haven’t tried it, but heard good things.

        • @ickplant
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          21 year ago

          Things I learn on Lemmy, for real. “It’s like Febreeze but for your insides.”

          • @HeyThisIsntTheYMCA
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            31 year ago

            Have they used “It’s a breathmint for your butthole” yet?

            • @ickplant
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              21 year ago

              That would be genius marketing right there. I already ordered some online. Can’t wait to smell my own farts.

              • @HeyThisIsntTheYMCA
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                21 year ago

                The only reason I haven’t bought some is because I’m poor. Hey devrom guys I just got you a sale. Send me some.

                • @ickplant
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                  21 year ago

                  Ok, the stuff works! It’s chewable tablets, banana flavored. You’re supposed to take several throughout the day, starting with 2. So, naturally, I threw 6 down my gullet to begin with. You know, for science.

                  Next morning, I took a vile shit. Just, crime-against-humanity levels of vileness. It didn’t smell at all. Just… nothing. Farts? No smell. Whatsoever.

                  I’m in awe. There is no way I would use this product for daily life (too expensive, too much hassle), but for specific situations (spending time in close quarters with friends or brand new significant other before you broke the poop/fart seal).

                  • @HeyThisIsntTheYMCA
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                    21 year ago

                    I just want to find a way to get my insurance to pay for it. I’m missing some body parts in my GI tract so I have several crime-against-humanity plops a day. My neighbors would probably be grateful for it.

                • @ickplant
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                  21 year ago

                  Lmao, I know what you mean, it was like $20 for what I assume is a monthly supply but I didn’t even look. I’m definitely never buying this again but damn, I had to try it once!

    • ℕ𝕖𝕞𝕠
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      fedilink
      01 year ago

      Farts don’t have to smell bad. This is something you can change with diet. In particular, avoiding animal products will help. But if you go completely vegan, then your sweat will smell weird, so it’s a trade-off.