If not, then what about rarely instead of never?

  • @SpaceNoodle
    link
    401 year ago

    I’d rather fart and be happy than smell nice in misery.

    • @ickplant
      link
      81 year ago

      If you really wanted the best of both worlds, you could get those underwear inserts that hide the smell.

        • @ickplant
          link
          71 year ago

          They even have a blanket for similar purposes (fart concealment) and it’s called “the marriage blanket.” Cause farts ruin your marriage, allegedly. Haven’t ruined mine, but what do I know.

      • @HeyThisIsntTheYMCA
        link
        English
        51 year ago

        There’s this mineral you can eat called bismuth subgallate that works as an internal deodorant. It’s sold under the brand name devrom. Haven’t tried it, but heard good things.

        • @ickplant
          link
          21 year ago

          Things I learn on Lemmy, for real. “It’s like Febreeze but for your insides.”

          • @HeyThisIsntTheYMCA
            link
            English
            31 year ago

            Have they used “It’s a breathmint for your butthole” yet?

            • @ickplant
              link
              21 year ago

              That would be genius marketing right there. I already ordered some online. Can’t wait to smell my own farts.

              • @HeyThisIsntTheYMCA
                link
                English
                21 year ago

                The only reason I haven’t bought some is because I’m poor. Hey devrom guys I just got you a sale. Send me some.

                • @ickplant
                  link
                  21 year ago

                  Lmao, I know what you mean, it was like $20 for what I assume is a monthly supply but I didn’t even look. I’m definitely never buying this again but damn, I had to try it once!

                • @ickplant
                  link
                  21 year ago

                  Ok, the stuff works! It’s chewable tablets, banana flavored. You’re supposed to take several throughout the day, starting with 2. So, naturally, I threw 6 down my gullet to begin with. You know, for science.

                  Next morning, I took a vile shit. Just, crime-against-humanity levels of vileness. It didn’t smell at all. Just… nothing. Farts? No smell. Whatsoever.

                  I’m in awe. There is no way I would use this product for daily life (too expensive, too much hassle), but for specific situations (spending time in close quarters with friends or brand new significant other before you broke the poop/fart seal).

                  • @HeyThisIsntTheYMCA
                    link
                    English
                    21 year ago

                    I just want to find a way to get my insurance to pay for it. I’m missing some body parts in my GI tract so I have several crime-against-humanity plops a day. My neighbors would probably be grateful for it.

    • ℕ𝕖𝕞𝕠
      link
      fedilink
      01 year ago

      Farts don’t have to smell bad. This is something you can change with diet. In particular, avoiding animal products will help. But if you go completely vegan, then your sweat will smell weird, so it’s a trade-off.