• @[email protected]
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    8 months ago

    Drink some oil as well. Partially to displace the stomach acid, but also to allow for the kernels to pop.

    • @dohpaz42
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      948 months ago

      And salt and butter. No one likes plain popcorn.

    • @Event_Horizon
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      68 months ago

      Would you need oil with body fat rendering?

    • @hOrni
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      48 months ago

      And shove a stick of dynamite up Your ass. Not necessarily before you die.

      • Chill Dude 69
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        8 months ago

        I heard something about pacemakers occasionally being left in bodies by mistake, and becoming small bombs in the crematorium ovens. That’s gotta be a trip, the first time you hear that shit.

        And then you probably have to get the oven inspected, to make sure the incident didn’t damage the gas lines. And that probably costs at LEAST a few thousand dollars. And probably tens of thousands, if something does need to be fixed. So, like, I’m pretty sure the boss is only going to let one of those slide, maximum, before you’re out on your ass.

  • @Rolando
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    608 months ago

    The body is often “prepared” for the funeral before it is cremated, so tape a couple hundred dollars to your chest with a note asking the preparer to leave your guts intact. Usually an underpaid apprentice does this, so there’s a chance they’ll go for it.

      • WhoisJohnGalt
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        68 months ago

        An old coworker of mine at some part-time gig went to school and studied “Mortuary Science”. Absolutely fascinated me. He had a second job at a crematorium where he was an apprentice.

        After him telling me that, I realized that I never thought about how someone got into that field. Never really considered someone going to school to do this as a career (which now I realize is obvious, but I never connected the dots).

        Always assumed people working at a crematorium or a cemetery was a cliche old decrepit guy.

  • @Tylerdurdon
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    218 months ago

    Also maybe see if you can wolf down an entire pickle. The cremator may be a pickle-with-popcorn kind of fella.

    • Chill Dude 69
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      98 months ago

      Is that a thing? I’ve never tried eating pickles with popcorn. But now I’m kinda curious.

      Unless it’s just code for some weird sex act. Then, probably not. I don’t want to lick anybody’s briny dong.

    • @[email protected]
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      118 months ago

      Popping is boiling, but you need the area around the kernel to be hotter than boiling. Outside you need oil.

      So really, you’d need to shotgun blast them into your own belly fat to accomplish cremation popcorn.

      Or drink a slurry of peanut oil full of popcorn kernels.

      Jesus christ I’m on a list now

    • @scifun
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      98 months ago

      And this is the reason for death in the first place.

  • Stern
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    8 months ago

    Is this viable?

    • @[email protected]
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      58 months ago

      Popcorn pops at about 180°C, and execution by electric chair apparently gets you to 100°C, so no.

  • @krondo
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    58 months ago

    Soooo … Corn ? 🌽🌽🌽

    • @[email protected]
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      28 months ago

      Actually no, popcorn’s a specific breed of corn. I think. Small enough kernels to withstand pressure longer or something like that.