• @[email protected]
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    12117 days ago

    Whether this is satire, or the “give us $1 or else” article is, or they’re both dead serious… this is peak Onion.

    In an age where reality is such bullshit that real life articles sound more like The Onion than The Onion, it is exactly what we need. I embrace our new deeply layered pungent overlords.

  • @[email protected]
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    10417 days ago

    I hope this goes as well as it’s being marketed to be, but I’ve long since stopped trusting people who have enough money to make a news-worthy purchase. Time will tell on this one for me.

    • @[email protected]
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      17 days ago

      this was my first tought. the discourse is also the same every time: oh we wont change anything about it! proceeds to change everything about it for the worse

      • @samus12345
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        3017 days ago

        The name Global Tetrahedron is, in true Onion fashion, a winking reference to a sinister fictional company featured in the book “Our Dumb Century,” which was written by The Onion’s staff and published in 1999.

        I love that book. I often think about the article from 2000 about all the world’s corporations merging into OmniCorps and how close that is to becoming a reality.

  • @Wilzax
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    5117 days ago

    The onion should be a worker’s collective given that the best satire comes from groups without ulterior motives and outside influences. No reason it should be possible for any company to lay off a majority of its workforce without fully going under and becoming a failed business.

  • @[email protected]
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    4517 days ago

    They really salvaged a legacy in the age of enshitification, that’s already legendary.

  • littleblue✨
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    3917 days ago

    Hol’ up.

    Does that mean that somehow The Onion is the last truly free press at the end of civilization? Fuck me. That’s probably the most poetically just dessert I’ve ever heard of.

    p.s. I swear to fuck, if either the Simpsons or xkcd already did this. Dammit. They did, didn’t they? 🤦🏽‍♂️

    • @evidences
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      3017 days ago

      Journalist formally of the daily beat and later NBC. NBC apparently pulled him from covering Twitter last year after he said something about about Elon on his personal social media accounts.

      • @Diplomjodler3
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        2617 days ago

        Well, he’s going to have a hard time coming up with satirical roasts about Musk that won’t be overtaken by reality the next day.

        • @Passerby6497
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          1417 days ago

          I’ve said for years that the onion should periodically publish real articles just to fuck with people, and ever since Mango Mussolini it wouldn’t even need to change much to do so.

          • @[email protected]
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            17 days ago

            Isn’t the Onion the one that reposts the school shooting article with only the date changed everytime a shooting happens in the states? To my knowledge its a real news article

            Edit: Found it, it seems though the last time they updated it was in 2022, but its basically a non satire response to the fact that absolutely nothing is being done to deal with the state’s problem with mass shootings

            • @XeroxCool
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              417 days ago

              No no, fakes names and misattributed quotes means it’s satire

            • @Diplomjodler3
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              417 days ago

              What do you mean, nothing is being done? They’re giving more people guns! Surely that will solve the problem!

          • @[email protected]
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            117 days ago

            It’s so true too. The last decade exposed a lot of the bullshit society deals with is so absurd it’s stranger than fiction.

    • @WarlockLawyer
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      317 days ago

      He was my favorite. I still think about him every so often.

  • Panda (he/him)
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    1917 days ago

    2024 is going to be simultaneously the best and worst year of all time