I can think of about four-twenty-ten-seven reasons not to learn French.
Four-twenty-seventeen
seventeen is said as ten-seven in French.
Belgium’s got it, though: soixante, septante, huitante, nonante, cent
Do they actually use that? If so, amazing. I saw that on a French YT channel’s April fools video this year.
Yes, they do. I think the Swiss partly do a as well.
From experience the french do the same with english
That’s the joke.png
Oh i guess i got whoosed. I thought it was a just the usual beef with french.
Que dis-tu ? Je ne parle pas anglais
I’m fine with that. French has done enough damage to English.
That’s the joke
“Je ne parle pas français” There you go, everything you need.
I can say “I don’t speak [language], sorry.” in about 10 languages, just so if someone tries to speak to me I can say that to them.
So far only one person has said any follow up things in that language. I like to think it was “but you’re speaking it now!” but probably just about work stuff.
Is it weird that I get a very tiny kick out of the slight confusion I can see on some people’s faces?
Nope, i also get that kick out of it haha. Love it.
Though, i must say that my french is really terrible so i might as wel just not speak it
IIRC if you cannot do it because you never learned it it’s “Je ne sais pas parler français”
“I do not speak French” versus “I do not know how to speak French”. Both are correct, though only the latter clarifies not speaking the language because they do not understand it, rather than purely out of spite. So in this specific case, the former could be used as a subtle FU.
Wouldnt “je ne sais pas parler francais” be more of a “i dont know speak french”? Like, sounding more gramatically broken?
The ‘parler’ is in an unconjugated form, i read that like its some broken form heheThe verb “parler” is indeed supposed to be unconjugated. That’s down to differing grammar and syntax in French and English. If I were to try and translate directly from French to English while maintaining the original sentence structure and whatnot, it would look roughly like this: “I not know not speaking French.”
…Which is awkward as hell to read, mostly thanks to French splitting negatives into two parts, but you can see how the verb “parler” (speaking or talking) is unconjugated.
You may also notice how that sentence structure looks more similar to an antiquated way of speaking English, if we tweak that just a little bit: “I know not how to speak French.”
From what I can find and from what I know, it is grammatically correct however French is not my first language. As an English speaker I would probably go “parler le français”
That would mean “speaking the French”, so while incorrect, I’m sure people would get what you would be trying to say.
Ok that’s what I thought thinking back on it. I don’t use french often enough to really be certain all the time
Moé chais pas comment jassé en jouale
Norway might not be accurately described in this map. While walking through the airport, every airport worker kept trying to speak to me in Norwegian. I don’t know any words in their language. It would be cool if I did, but I don’t. Anyway, they always looked confused, repeated themselves more slowly, and waited for a response from me. Eventually, I realized one of them was asking me about my backpack.
Also I feel like the French really appreciate it if you try. Or at least hate you a little less. In my experience, after showing off my best (still bad) bonjours and mercis all of the people I talked to turned a lot friendlier and were even willing to speak a little English.
This doesn’t reflect my housemate’s experience in Italy at all. Evidently if they detect an American accent in your “buongiorno” they’ll just spend the rest of the day mocking you in Italian and occasionally just yelling “DONALD TRUMP HAMBURGER TRANSGENDER” at you.
Not all Germany is like that. I was in Freiburg last winter and the can’t/don’t want to speak English. Only the most tourist places would speak English, I guess.
“Pardon my French”
Absolutely not
Is that you, Werner Herzog?
Herzog was handsome in his youth but this fella looks nothing like him.
It’s a reference to this:
Oh I know, I love this, but thank you. I was just making a very poor joke.
Thanks for this. I could watch this channel all day long.
This is what one of Edmond Dantes alter egos did in the Count of Monte Cristo. “Lord Wilmore” was an eccentric Englishman who understood French perfectly well, but refused to speak it:
… Lord Wilmore appeared….His first remark on entering was, “You know, sir, I do not speak French?”
“I know you do not like to converse in our language,” replied the envoy.
“But you may use it,” replied Lord Wilmore; “I understand it.”
Imagine if French people learned English and chose to speak it online/in-game instead of assuming everyone speaks French as if it is still the lingua franca.
J’ai dû apprendre le français à l’école. L’alternative aurait été le latin. Je déteste tellement cette langue.
You can keep all mistakes I made in that sorry excuse of a garbage language.
Tu détestes le français spécifiquement, ou juste le fait d’avoir eu à apprendre une autre langue?
Le français, je peux comprendre un peu, il y a quant même plusieurs spécificités étranges à cette langue. Ce n’est pas pour rien qu’on passe plusieurs années à l’apprendre avant d’éventuellement passer à la littérature. Je crois que les cours d’anglais langue première font cette transition beaucoup plus tôt.
Détester le fait d’avoir eu à apprendre une autre langue, là je ne comprends pas du tout!
Pour les spécificités étrange avez vous un example?
Pour un apprenant anglophone, par exemple:
- Les objets inanimés genrés
- Les lettres muettes en fin de mot (s au pluriel, e final, etc)
- Les différentes façons d’écrire un même son (é, er, et, ai)
- Les différentes façons de prononcer une même lettre (c, s)
- L’énorme quantité de conjugaisons de verbes possibles
T’as oublié la liaison. La putain de liaison de merde fait chier.
Le Subjonc…go fuck yourself
Tu détestes le français spécifiquement, ou juste le fait d’avoir eu à apprendre une autre langue?
Я ненавижу французский конкретно. Я сожалею, что так и не выучил итальянский должным образом.
Le français, je peux comprendre un peu, il y a quant même plusieurs spécificités étranges à cette langue.
That accoustic dumpster fire shouldn’t even be referred to as a language.
Détester le fait d’avoir eu à apprendre une autre langue, là je ne comprends pas du tout!
Außer mangelnder Zeit habe ich kein Problem damit neue Sprachen zu lernen.
I guess I have my answer ;) I don’t know Russian but I know enough Ukrainian to know you’re talking about French and Italian, lol. And I know barely enough German to know you’re talking about learning languages (Sprachen).
Not quite sure what you hate accoustically about French, though… The “r” sounds? I guess they’re very different from most other languages, but you seem to like German… If you’re comparing to Spanish (among others), I guess the overall stressing of sounds in a sentence is pretty different, too.
Also, what kind of French did you have to learn? France has a very different sound from Québec for example… Altough if I look closely I see you’re on the sh.itjust.works instance and you mention having to learn it in school, which tends to indicate you’re Canadian. I guess hating on French is par for the course, then…
I guess I have my answer ;) I don’t know Russian but I know enough Ukrainian to know you’re talking about French and Italian, lol.
I said that I hate French specifically and that I regret never having learned Italian properly. In German I said that I have no problem with learning new languages if it wasn’t for lack of time.
Not quite sure what you hate accoustically about French, […]
Reading and writing French is OK(ish, if I didn’t vocalize it in my head). I really hate the sound of that language. It sends shivers down my spine. I think for one thing I prefer harder/rougher sounding languages. Also, I’m an unforgiving person. We were told we can start learning a third language when we are in 7th grade. I was pondering whether to pick up Russian, Italian or Swedish. Then 7th grade comes around and the school’s like: Yah, you can choose between French and Latin. Well, fuck you too school. I hate our school system for this (and other reasons) to this day.
but you seem to like German
Being German, I’m kind of stuck with it. Not that I particularly dislike it, though.
If you’re comparing to Spanish (among others), I guess the overall stressing of sounds in a sentence is pretty different, too.
I dislike French, the language, not the people. I slightly dislike Spaniards, but not their language. Italian people speak loudly because they talk across the street. Spanish people do that while standing right next to each other. I think I’ll never get used to that.
Also, what kind of French did you have to learn?
French French.
[…] which tends to indicate you’re Canadian.
Ha! Show me one comment where I apologized ;-)
Sorry I mistook you for a Canadian. There were just a couple clues pointing in that direction. I totally get you though, loving or hating a language isn’t something rational; I used to have a strong dislike for Spanish for pretty irrational reasons.
If you like rougher languages, you should listen to some Québec French, then. There’s actually a song about how it sounds really different from France’s French: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AgiNoNqYXMA
Ok I’m biased but Latin and Greek are so much worse (yes I’ve been there).
Friend of mine went to a school which fashioned itself as “the old school” (as in historically old school). They learned latin and old greek instead of anything useful. He was furious when he came back from vacation in Greece and he only found one person, an old professor in Greek history, who he could talk to.
Yeah but Latin’s pretty much a dead language, and the Greeks never spread their “disease” of a language on the scale that the French did
Ironiquement, tu n’as pas fait de fautes, tu as même pensé à l’accent circonflexe à « dû ».
I always had better grades in French than in English. Which bothered me, because I hated French almost from the start and thought English was/is much more important.
I don’t know where you are from but where I am in Canada French class is graded quite generously
Germany.
Je suis dans ça mème et je ne l’aime pas.
Oui, j’ai appris la langue française à l’école aussi.
Non, je ne veux… sais pas parler français!
Non, je ne veux… sais pas parler français!
Ну, тогда не надо. Есть много лучших языков.
Joke’s on you, there is no mistake in your comment.
Hey, an Anglo-Québecois!
Va swinger la bacaisse dans l’fond d’la boite à boîs
Ouf… Je me suis pris un bon de Québec en pleine tête. Je n’étais pas prêt.
Je ne parlé français, même que je comprend un peut le français.
(Almost nothing, I just took one class lol).
Que bacán huevon
I feared someone answering me in French and I’ll be like “yeah I understand 40% of what you’re saying”… never expected someone to answer me in my native tongue and slang.
1000111100100111, 111100011 1100 11001110001! :)
I can’t figure it out.
rekt
C’est pas mal pour un cours !
Merci beaucoup!
I mean, this is what you call a power move.
If a French-speaking person gives you shit for pronouncing words in French wrong, dare them to say “LinkedIn” in the presence of your English-speaking fluency and try to not humiliate themselves. Maybe first bait then with one they can do, like “Facebook” before crushing their spirits.
Like we could get mean with “squirrel” or “thorough” or “hedgehog”, but those are less reasonable that they’d have fucking consistent practice with.
Ha ha ask a yank to pronounce “squirrel” or “mirror” you’ll get sqwrrrrrrl and meeeeer
I need to know how they would pronounce it. I took French so long ago, and for such a short time, I barely remember any of it.
Leen koo din.
For some reason 3 syllables and for some reason a very rounded “ooh” that is absolutely nowhere to be found in its spelling.
Most Québécois would pronounce it just like Anglophones. I don’t see how that’s a trick question.
Worcestershire
Proof that Americans aren’t fluent.
I just have them speak my name. Lived in France for 12 years now and not 1 has got it right.
I have a Scottish name that starts with “Mc”
Every bank and government institution in France separates the “Mc” from the second part, resulting in lost records, odd looking bank cards, fucked up tax returns etc etc
Wouldn’t change it for the world 😂
Schedule would be a great word
N’importe quoi. C’est juste que Linkedin a sa propre prononciation en français. Et puis, faut savoir ! Vous détestez les lettres muettes mais qu’on a pas vous êtes pas content…
If a French person wants to say “LinkedIn” is its own unique french word, then they can all STFU at any pronunciation of croissant they deem unworthy.
CrussAunt. Fight me.
LinkedIn is an English word. Pronounce it correctly, or we revoke your “tell anyone how to pronounce anything” card.
I don’t have any problem the way you might say “croissant” in english. I’m, however, in a feud with all those ignorants that like to point out how french prononciation is ridiculous using croissant as an example. “You should pronounce it k’r’o’ee’sssssssss’a’n’t nianiani niania nia” !
Croissant is actually a great example about prononciation of a french word. Not exception or weird non written rule involved.Yeah my point here is rooted in living amongst French speakers who will correct an American or British pronunciation of a word like croissant. And those same folks cannot pronounce “LinkedIn” even though it’s far more pervasive in their vernacular than croissant is in ours.
But I only use this weapon as defense.
This may be the most Canadian meme ever made, even if unintentionally.
Very few of us know any of it, the further west you go the less you’ll find it
But we do view Quebec as better than Ontario
And French people as better than Americans
