• @grue
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    10523 days ago

    It’s actually 10 hours of quarter-assed energy, because it only speeds up your metabolism half as much.

  • Zagorath
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    23 days ago

    The correct answer is that it gives you 3.5 hours at 70% of the energy boost.

    • Phuntis
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      23 days ago

      pick a side you spineless fencesitter

      • @ByteJunk
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        523 days ago

        It’s this one here, Jedi sir.

  • @CluckN
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    5623 days ago

    So quirky! Did they pull out their sp0rks and duel???

    • @fjordbasa
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      2223 days ago

      Oh no, it’s t3h PeNgU1N oF d00m.

    • @[email protected]
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      923 days ago

      We are so quirky, even the people in the improve show thought we were soooo random. Some people said we should be on stage because of how random and quirky our conversations are.

    • Cosmo
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      723 days ago

      Is a spork a spoon with an added fork, or is it a fork with an added spoon?

      • @neatchee
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        1623 days ago

        Spoon with fork properties. A fork with spoon properties would require adding material back in, whereas the former is just removing a bit of material to create the prongs.

  • @neatchee
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    23 days ago

    Caffeine has a half-life in the human body of approximately 4-6 hours. So this means that the “5 hours” in 5hr Energy is just the amount of time it takes for your body to process half the caffeine away.

    Therefore drinking half of a 5hr Energy would be 0 hours of the advertised level of energy. At best it would be like drinking a 5hr Energy and then immediately fast-forwarding 5 hours

      • @neatchee
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        123 days ago

        Not even. I can’t speak for others but the effects of 5hr Energy pretty much disappear after those 5 hours are up. Half the caffeine dose isn’t enough to do much of anything, at least for me. So it’s essentially a waste. I’m sure it depends on things like BMI but to get 5hrs of half-assed energy you’d need to consume 3/4ths of a dose, which would leave you with roughly half the experience of a 5hr Energy (that is, half the difference between the caffeine in your system immediately after drinking one dose and 5hrs after drinking one)

        • @[email protected]
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          122 days ago

          Except you’ve already had 5 hours of your body metabolizing caffeine, so the effects of the remaining half a dose after 5 hours aren’t nearly the same as if you took that half a dose after a night’s sleep and not having had any. Your body becomes accustomed to it. That’s how all drugs work. You can take 6 grams of mushrooms and it’ll definitely still be in your system after 6 hours, but the effects won’t be the same as taking 3 grams straight up, it will have almost entirely worn off despite the residual psilocybin in your body.

    • @[email protected]
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      423 days ago

      It took me until your comment to realise I had skimmed over the word “half” in the OP. Now this whole thing makes sense.

      • @dejected_warp_core
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        1523 days ago

        Kinda. From the CVS website:

        Vitamin B6, Vitamin B12, Vitamin B3 (Niacin), Citicoline, Tyrosine, Phenylalanine, Taurine, Malic Acid, Glucuronolactone, Caffeine. Other Ingredients: Purified Water; Natural and Artificial Flavors; Sucralose; Potassium Sorbate, Sodium Benzoate and EDTA.

        So, Caffeine for sure. But the b-complex, and Taurine will also give you a boost, for entirely different reasons. Half this stuff is psuedo-scientific at best, and the rest just filler.

    • @[email protected]
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      122 days ago

      5 hour energy drinks are not just caffeine, which is what sets them apart from other energy drinks. Vitamin B12 and shit like that.

      • @neatchee
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        222 days ago

        As far as I’m aware, unless you’re already B12 deficient, the B12 in 5hr Energy doesn’t do much of anything because it already hangs around in your blood stream for a long, long time. Half life on B12 in the body is something like 6 days and excess is even stored in the liver instead of excreted.

        Can’t speak to the other ingredients but I’d guess it’s all the same: either it’s already available in abundance if you’re eating a decent diet, or the half life is close to that of caffeine

  • @olafurp
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    1322 days ago

    If anyone is looking for the real answer then the half life of caffeine is 6 hours.

    The almost correct answer in half-assed energy for 6 hours

  • @[email protected]
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    1323 days ago

    Since caffeine drops exponentially, it would last somewhere between 2.5 and 5 hours and would be half as strong.

  • @[email protected]
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    1223 days ago

    The only time I took one of those during a night road trip it have me a really big boost for about an hour and then about 3 hours of half assed energy. It wasn’t fun

    • @[email protected]
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      322 days ago

      The last time I had one(and for the record, it was several), I was driving across the country on a tight schedule, and I either saw or hallucinated some very oddly-behaved lights over eastern Colorado.

      • @[email protected]
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        222 days ago

        Aurora Borealis? At this time of year! At this time of day! In this part of the country! Localized entirely within eastern Colorado?

  • g0d0fm15ch13f
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    21 days ago

    Similar story here, my youngest just graduated college. And apparently my family sat in front of one of his neighbors who I met later at the a house party. And he goes “I’m pretty sure I sat behind you at the ceremony. I sat down and the first thing I heard was ‘god bless those Australians, they took one look at a whole onion and said ‘I bet you we can fry that and Americans will eat it’’”

  • Stern
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    423 days ago

    eg or eguh