If I’m an adult who wants to experience splashing around and wading round the pool, but whose swimming capabilities extend as far as doggy paddling to safety and floating on my back - what can I even do to have fun at the pool?

What do you do at the pool?

Bonus round: kind of out of my budget to pay for swimming classes, and available friends & family are nil. :c
But I borrowed a life jacket from a coworker, and could buy cheap floaties or a pool noodle.

  • SolidGrue
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    1 month ago

    Swim.

    Not get splashed or crowded by kids, mostly.

    edit: lol, sorry. misinterpreted the question

    Public pools have a shallow end and a deep end. It’s difficult (but not impossible!) to drown in the shallow end because you can just stand up, but you can still swim.

    Most humans, especially fat Western humans, are naturally buoyant. Completely inert, most (fat) Western people will float above the bottom of their nose (because we’re fat.) Very lean or muscular people tend to be more neutrally buoyant or even negatively buoyant (sink), YMMV.

    Most important thing to remember as an Aquatic Mammal is you WILL get water in your nose, and sometimes down your windpipe. DO NOT PANIC. It burns, you will want to cough. Resist that urge. If you are under water or do not have free air passage, DO NOT COUGH. Control the urge and break the surface, then you can go ham coughing and sputtering.

    The most important thing about being in and around water is to be comfortable. If you’re not comfortable, you’re too deep. Get shallow.

    source: PADI certified diver

    • @ccunning
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      101 month ago

      most Western people will float above the bottom of their nose

      Is that true of salt and fresh water? I’m pretty comfortable floating around in salt water but have grown paranoid with age about fresh water.

      • SolidGrue
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        1 month ago

        People are more buoyant in salt water because it has higher molar mass. Humans on average are about 90% density of water by mass so about 10% of your frame would float above the surface, which is generally enough to expose your nose. Of course you can articulate your neck, float on your back, tread water…

        Salinity also matters. Salty water you might be up to 3% or 5% more buoyant, pound for pound, compared to fresh water.

        Really, it depends on how fat and how salty, but generally the difference is less than 5% by mass.

        • @[email protected]
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          201 month ago

          My grandfather was an old-skool, wiry, dirt-farmer. He was unable to float above the surface in Utah’s Great Salt Lake.

          I aspire to be that compactly muscular.

          • SolidGrue
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            61 month ago

            That … That’s baller. I’m “doughy” at best, and its all I’ll ever be.

    • @[email protected]
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      71 month ago

      That stroke where you breathe out down and time your arms to breathe in to the side: I hate it. I don’t like the feeling of water on my face while I try to take a quick breath. That’s my secret: I’m always uncomfortable in the water…

  • @[email protected]
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    321 month ago

    Learning to swim in a pool with a shallow end isn’t too difficult for an adult. Just don’t pay attention to assholes or give up because it doesn’t come naturally.

    Watch a video or two to learn the motions (breast stroke is easiest, but freestyle or side crawls are also good to start with), then just get in the pool (shallow end, please). Start by crouching down to the level of your mouth, and breathing through your nose. Become comfortable with water near your mouth.

    Then dip your nose into the water and blow out through it at the same time (blowing bubbles). You’ll quickly get the hang of holding pressure in your airways so that water doesn’t enter when you dive below the surface. Once you get to that point, start laying face down in the water. You don’t even have to be stiff, or try to swim, just get used to having your back towards the sky. Finally, after the 20 minutes this will probably take you, start trying to mimic the motions on the videos you watched. Again, ignore the feeling that you suck at this, because everyone sucks at it when starting. You’re just an adult, so you realize how bad you are at the beginning, just like when learning a new instrument. With an hour or so of attempts, you’ll have a pretty good idea of how to move around the pool.

  • @[email protected]
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    231 month ago

    If you can afford to save then I highly recommend you to save up for classes. Not just for the exercise aspect but (primary) as a safety measure.

    Floating around on ones back is seriously underrated. You just drift around a bit, relax and disconnect for a bit.

    • @shalafi
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      31 month ago

      Saved my own life because I had learned to swim and float at 5.

  • @[email protected]
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    201 month ago

    Swim, if necessary get a couple of classes. So you can enjoy the exercise aspect of it.

    If there is a water slide on whatever, it’s not just for kids, so you can have some fun there too.

    Just a thing, please don’t block the swimming lanes to play around, it’ll be annoying for you and the swimmers

  • @SauceBossSmokin
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    201 month ago

    I used to have an in-ground pool at my home when I lived in Oklahoma. I would float on a pool noodle and sipping beer while listening to reggae. I was in my happy place. I miss having a pool.

    • @kender242
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      21 month ago

      'I be crazy too, little buddy, but at least when I be craziest, I be floating all alone in space and the crazy, she float out of me, she soak into the walls, and she don’t come out till there be battles and little boys bump into the walls and squish out de crazy.’

  • southsamurai
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    141 month ago

    Exercise.

    Arthritis, and other musculoskeletal problems put me on the disabled list a long time ago. So, if I want anything resembling sustained cardio, it’s water or jerking off. Or both, I guess.

    Point being that water based exercise is a wonderful thing when you have any kind of mobility issues. You get resistance without stress on joints, or at least a lot less stress. So you can bust your ass and get some good work in instead of doing fifteen minutes and needing a handful of NSAIDs and the rest of the day to recover.

    I just wish I could go more often. We don’t have a pool in our town that’s even semi useful for that. The YMCA the next town over has times set aside, but it’s a tough thing to schedule in.

  • @Today
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    141 month ago

    Bounce around. Dive for coins or toys. Float. Chat with people. Some people water walk. I make my family and friends participate in made up Olympic events like race across the pool while sitting cross cross applesauce and only use your hands.

    • @felbane
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      31 month ago

      Some people water walk.

      Yeah, but usually only if their 12 buddies are stressing out in a weather-weary boat

  • @aesthelete
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    141 month ago

    Swim laps ya maggot!

    /s /drill instructor

  • AwkwardLookMonkeyPuppet
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    131 month ago

    Just talk to people while getting out of the heat. Or sit waist deep in water and get drunk. That’s always a good time.

  • ℕ𝕖𝕞𝕠
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    121 month ago

    Teach my kids to swim, float on my back, practice holding my breath, do underwater laps, finally do that Slavic dance where you alternate balancing in you heels with kicks without tipping over…

  • Toes♀
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    101 month ago

    I used to have access to a unsupervised swimming pool and would get a floaty chair and I just vibe floating around.

    The kids would sometimes push me around like a game of pong.

    But I like being in the water with friends and a loud speaker playing EDM.

  • @db2
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    101 month ago

    Just be in the water. Even if all you do is basically walk or dog paddle laps around the perimeter at a very leisurely pace you’re getting good exercise in. Every movement you make in the water is resisted by the water.

    • @Donjuanme
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      61 month ago

      Imo keeping stationary with your elbows out of the water burns more calories than most swimming. Best workout you can do is to keep your elbows dry while not touching the ground.

      But all swimming is wonderful exercise. Just don’t float in the lane lines (sounds like op isn’t swimming when laps are happening)

  • Sean
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    1 month ago

    Poop in the shallow end

    /s