• Dharma Curious (he/him)
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    282 months ago

    I mean, I guess it depends on where he’s keeping his phone while nude. He might enjoy a little nude pickpocketing, if he’s open minded, and the pickpocket has sufficient lube

  • @58008
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    222 months ago

    This is why I keep my front door key in my foreskin. Either I evade the pickpocket, or I make a new friend. I cannot lose.

    As a younger man, I was able to unlock the door hands-free. These days, I need to fish the key out of my floppy beige KKK hood like a sock trapped in a duvet cover on laundry day.

      • @harmsy
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        2 months ago

        Mr. Skeltal’s was worse.

        Edit: I misremembered the meme. It was Mr. Bones. Doot doot.

  • Hossenfeffer
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    182 months ago

    I keep my keys in my prison pocket. Along with my phone. And my wallet. And my EDC pocket knife. And a Leatherman. And a Moleskin and a couple of pens. And a tactical flashlight. And a small first aid kit.

    I do walk a bit funny though.

    • @SpaceNoodle
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      92 months ago

      Which tactics do you employ with that flashlight?

    • NaibofTabr
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      32 months ago

      So, like, which one goes in first? And if you need that, do you have to pull everything else out of your pocket to get to it?

      • Hossenfeffer
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        52 months ago

        Nah, they go in any order and then you just kind of… rootle around in there.

        • NaibofTabr
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          12 months ago

          Cool, cool cool cool… your pocket knife isn’t spring-assisted is it? or a gravity knife?

  • SendPicsofSandwiches
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    2 months ago

    That’s where you’re wrong: for nature’s pocket can still be picked and it doesn’t even need to be full to do so

  • @jaybone
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    52 months ago

    Bro needs to do some manscaping on his eyebrows for real fam, no cap.

  • @niktemadur
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    22 months ago

    Yeah but what about nutkicking, then?

  • @NegativeInf
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    12 months ago

    Jokes on you, I keep my bills rolled in my foreskin.