• @wjrii
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    2 months ago

    As a child growing up in the foothills of Grenyarnia, life was a simple, bucolic idyll. Every day the sun would shine through my modest little window, and I’d wake to the gentle scent of the titan arums, as well as the somewhat more pungent, but equally welcome, aroma of the Svenborgian staff bringing me my breakfast.

    Oh what a repast it always was! The earthy notes of the Organic sixième presse de pied grape juice! The ever-unexpected delights of caviar-infused macarons! And to top it all off, of course, was my favorite, the delightful egg dish! The name is a bit of a mouthful, Sot den Arschlächer et ass eng Omelette, but my family and I always just called them our beloved Arschloch Omelettes. I never quite took down the recipe, as our staff mysteriously disappeared one night, coincidentally along with some of the tableware and a few million kroner of what mummy and daddy called the loose change. C’est la vie! You will be missed, Griselda! Or was it Greta? Or Bob?

    Still, through my years of studying the culinary arts, with literally hours spent every month living and breathing the finest recipes and influencers, I think I’ve come close. My life coach and herbalist both tell me they’ve never tasted anything like it. Please enjoy my most favorite thing, and maybe you’ll become an Arschloch lover like me…

    • @Jerkface
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      82 months ago

      How do you nominate for comment of the year?

  • @TheBannedLemming
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    282 months ago

    They say anyone can cook. But that doesn’t mean that anyone should cook.

  • @nialv7
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    202 months ago

    The only problem I have with this is if I eat this many eggs in one sitting I will be on bed for the next couple of days.

    • no bananaOP
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      132 months ago

      This is obviously meant to be a cake. You shouldn’t eat an entire cake.

      In one sitting.

  • @AnUnusualRelic
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    202 months ago

    I don’t even understand what I’m looking at.

    • @Imhotep
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      272 months ago

      an omelett, but the eggs haven’t been stirred

      I find this incredibly funny, still laughing, yet I’m not sure why

      • @AnUnusualRelic
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        2 months ago

        Oh, ok, I thought it was the various ingredients. I zoomed in and finally figured out it was merely different shots of the same thing.

      • MentalEdge
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        62 months ago

        I just keep imagining the faint outlines of the yolks and I burst into a fit of giggles.

  • THCDenton
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    192 months ago

    I just fucked up a french omelet and now i don’t feel so bad about it

  • @Xenny
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    192 months ago

    That… Actually takes some skill to do