Now survive Troll you swedish she/they
This is a Masterclass.
American psycho is not a horror movie. It’s way too good to be a horror movie. It’s a thriller.
human centipede:
I would simply not.
Also obligatory
ITT people who don’t quite get the post
Know1ng: that’s not how you spell it
It Follows: idk I might be fukt I read pet sematary
Splice: just tie a knot instead
Damn Swedes are horror-proof!
Inget är mer skrämmande än ett halvår av totalt mörker per år
förutom kanske sex månader av obevekligt dagsljus

Kiruna
The Ring: “I don’t even OWN a TV.”
No VCR
I don’t wear jewelry.
I never boxed.
My survival suggestion is, “never assume the monster is dead until you have removed its head from its body.”
Doesn’t work in Return of the Living Dead.
Sinister: I won’t move house
The Burbs: IDGAF what my neighbors are doing and you shouldn’t either.
Evil Dead: Reading Books? I’ll wait for the movie.
Tremors: Leave
The Purge: Fake wound and blood and inject a paralyzer. Play dead until morning. Wonder if they visited that in the sequels because I have only watched the first.
I know this is a shitpost but I can’t help myself, paralytic drugs also paralyze your diaphragm and only last a few minutes. Pancuronium is the longest lasting paralytic and a single dose will get you 60-90 mins max. Youd spend your time fully conscious while suffocating and be dead before anyone could notice your sweet prosthetic makeup.
Also, you’d still have a pulse and warmth/color to your skin. Paralytics don’t stop your heartbeat, and are know to raise it to dangerous levels or cause dysrhythmias if not carefully controlled. So anything more than a passing glance (assuming you lived long enough for it to matter) would immediately give up the game and you’d be defenseless
Nope: nope
Funny Games: Too tired to play, let’s do it tomorrow
Ready Or Not: Not yet
Rec: Damn I forgot to press record
Seven: Idgaf about catholicism but this one really fucked me up.
It’s probably not even a real horror movie for some; I’m just not for this genre at all.
The Fly (80s version) is one of the few I watched. Also really fucked me up. Help me OOP: how could I have survived it?
For the fly, find Janeway, she will make it her mission to kill both of the hybrid entities, which might result in you going back to normal.
Edit: Or it might result in Janeway becoming like Jason and always slowly walking towards you with a machete. At which point I think you need to recruit Freddy to deal with her.
I think during the time of The Fly Janeway was running for a city council seat in Boston (she had to; her opponent was under the influence of a Melmacian agent.)
Aliens Vs Predator: I would fully support any immigrant who attacks sexual predators.
Except the “Aliens” are pretty much always shown to be born locally and the “Predators” never eat their kills.












